Is there something in Stephanie's bite,
that we're all infected with twilight shite?
I just know I'll get it in the neck,
but all these undead, all over, by heck!
John Polidori must be very sorry
at showing no patience with his former patient.
A dreadful penny, the price of Varney's fame,
produced imitators, so feebly lame
- I dare not even say their name:
gone, forgotten and it's not a shame.
Sheridan - one-time critic of Bram -
had his own version of the blood feast sham.
This nineteenth century metaphor
for sexual disease is such a bore.
Annie Rice must have thought it nice
to coincide with a plague, its origins vague
but laying swathes of people low
their lifestyles deserving of this blow,
as tv preachers loved to say
- their own sins hidden from light of day.
But why now, an ever increasing list
of dentally challenged protaganists?
What allegory are these writers making?
Or are these novels all they're taking?
Comments
lenchenelf | October 7, 2009 - 09:44
Err, a sci-tech zeitgeist dependant allegory or rehash? mmm, good question. :-) atb Lenax
threeleafshamrock | October 7, 2009 - 12:13
There's a lot of them about alright. Bring back Buffy, I say...
chuck | October 7, 2009 - 13:11
It's the old romantic outsider thing innit? All they want is some love and respect.
threeleafshamrock | October 7, 2009 - 13:21
... and a dark room with a coffin in it; not much to ask for...
insertponceyfre... | October 7, 2009 - 14:30
I don't understand vampires, but twilight shite is brilliant - wouldn't that make a great name for a band?
Ewan | October 7, 2009 - 18:02
It probably already is IPFNH, it probably already is.
threeleafshamrock | October 7, 2009 - 19:31
And here we have it folks; the number one record from 'Twilight Shite'....
'Blowjob with Menaces'
..... Yodel, yodel, yodel.......
chuck | October 7, 2009 - 20:52
....from their incredible new album 'Fangs for the Memories.'
insertponceyfre... | October 7, 2009 - 20:58
oh god I wish I hadn't said anything now....
WilkyBarKid | October 8, 2009 - 08:37
Interesting question you pose. I've been wondering myself about why the mythos is being watered down.
Modern vampires are romantic/tragic heroes. They still have that 'bad boy' aesthetic, but they are sensitive, tortured souls struggling against the bestial nature of their addiction.
Their audience demographic is moving younger, from the MTV to the High School Musical generation.
Why have they been de-fanged so that they are no longer out-and-out evil and dangerous? Why are they more obviously erotic yet less sexually predatorial? What does it say about our current sexual mores? Are we such wishy-washy liberals that we now support the rights of monsters living in our midst?
Centuries old creatures seduce young teenagers and it is now acceptable and somehow noble? Is the subtext therefore some sort of covert warning about paedophilia?
Or are we just being invited to integrate economic migrants from Eastern Europe into Western society?
Ewan | October 8, 2009 - 08:58
All very good questions to which I have no answer, but there's a lot of them about. I must confess to having looked at True Blood for a one-and-only time recently; it seems that they have removed all the evil from the glamour, which renders the whole business ultimately pointless.
chuck | October 8, 2009 - 11:36
It's not just vampires. Zombies are hot too. These are cynical times. Or maybe young people just like scary stuff?
threeleafshamrock | October 8, 2009 - 18:58
I think that a couple of mine are Zombies!
PipConn | May 4, 2010 - 19:20
Bravo :D
P.Connelly
V.C.Willow | May 31, 2011 - 21:06
Love it. Buffy was fangtastic and even Anne Rice wasn't too bloody bad, but the monotony of Vampire movies and books are making me cross.
Great poem BTW
All best
B. Lud-Thursdy