Super Laura IP

Well done on this one, Pia. My mind is a blank at the moment as far as the IP is concerned, but I really enjoyed hearing all about the adventures of Laura, and its rather poignant ending;-)

Tina

Hi Tina- thanks for reading- glad you liked this- it is based on facts-she is still on her voyage and will be the youngest ever to have circumnavigated the globe!!
;)Pia

Hi Pia,

what a great adventure for a woman, and what a
great idea for the IP, you have really used your
imagination on this piece.

A very enjoyable read.

Jenny.

Go, Laura, and Go, Pia! Really enjoyed this, the ending in particular, and as Jenny said, what an adventure :)

Rachel xx

Hi Jenn- you know I didn't use my imagination that much because this is based on a true story: 15 year old Laura is still on her circumnavigation- she has reached French Polynesia at this date. Laura is a young girl from The Netherlands. You can google her Laura Dekker- it is an incredible story.

Thank you so much for reading and commenting- I really appreciate it
atb
;)Pia

Hi Rachel- I am not sure if I understand these lonely seafarer's quest but I do admire them. Yes she truly is an adventurer and so young.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
atb
;)Pia

This is lovely Pia - and the ending is excellent.

thank you OTT- she is a remarkable young lady.

;)Pia

Oh I like this! I used to live in Portsmouth Harbour and went to watch the yachts go off around the world from from teh Quays, once saw Dee Cafiri set off on the Vendee Globe race, so this struck a chord. Lovely use of line length.
LEJ

Thanks for reading LEJ- must have been lovely to live right by the harbour.

;)Pia

I'm being totally honest. This is a good poem
and one of the most striking things about it is the vocabulary that you use.

Reading this, it is difficult to believe that you are not a sailor because you use nautical terms
so convincingly.

Parts of this poem are also very dramatic and atmospheric like

All was quiet
There wasn’t a wind
Only the shackles
Could be heard
Clanging against the mast
The sails hung limp from the riggings

And the eery quietness you describe really helps to convey a sense of being alone but also of how frightening it might be for a teenage girl to face
such dangers alone and thus how courageous she must be.

There is also a romanticism about this poem. You are celebrating a real life romantic heroine

"Young maiden of the seas
Stronger than most"

And a serious minded young woman with grit and determination:

'made a decision
She had to keep her timetable'

But this is also a poem about someone facing and overcoming obstacles; the elements; loneliness;
sailing such a large boat single handed; youth
and all the conventional assumptions/stereotypes about youth and gender.

It's an inspirational poem, I think, because it isn't just about sailing a boat but about universal things like getting through life alone and facing obstacles.

Reading this poem convinces me that you are a writer and should keep writing.

Thanks very very much John- you a very supportive. I really appreciaate your praise. You know I may very well look into the poetry handbooks you recommend on the other thread. If not for anything else- I am sure I will learn something but I do feel I have come to a bit of a standstill with my poetry writing in english. It is all a bit strenuous- but hey who said you get anything for free? Ha ha I know it is hard work but it used to come easily to me.

I am so glad for your words. I can't thank you enough. So kind of you.

;)Pia