Joan Collins. part 2

I was peeling the label off the beer bottle, making a neat pile of tinfoil and sticky paper on the table. Every now and again I twisted my ring the right way around. It was a little too big and it kept slipping the other way so the stone didn’t show. Joel finished his drink and looked across at me;

“So what we do is put down that we’re engaged, and then we go on the waiting list, and eventually they give us a flat. It’s a piece of piss. Ok?”

He pushed the form over to me, with the little William Hill pen balanced on top of it, making a detour to avoid the sticky rings our bottles had made on the table. I was amazed at how easy it sounded and signed my name quickly. What a brilliant idea! I never knew you could get a flat with so little hassle.

I passed the papers back to Joel, and then held out my finger to admire my ring again. I suddenly thought we could use it as proof. Ok, it wasn’t exactly an engagement ring – it was much prettier than that, and anyway, who said you had to have a bog standard diamond one after all? I much preferred the little piece of onyx in the middle of mine. “Black, like your heart” Joel had said, when he’d given it to me a few weeks before, which had made me laugh a lot and after putting it on, I’d flung my arms around him to say thank you.

I remembered how red his face had gone when I’d done that. It was funny; I hadn’t been expecting anything nice to start with, even though it had been my birthday. When he’d told me to close my eyes, I’d looked at him warily;

“Promise it’s not going to be anything nasty and I will.”

He and T had fooled me that way once before, and then launched themselves on me once I’d done what they’d said and was standing there defenceless, waiting for the nice surprise.

Joel had rolled his eyes upwards;

“Honestly – you don’t trust anyone do you? I promise. Ok?”

So I’d taken a deep breath, because I still didn’t entirely trust him, closed my eyes, and shortly afterwards, I’d felt a little box being put in my hand, and then Joel had said,

“Ok you can open them now. Happy birthday”

I’d ripped the paper off, opened the lid, and there was a tiny silver ring inside. No one had ever given me a ring before and I was thrilled.

“Mum helped me choose it. It’s black onyx”

“Fucking hell you never said anything to her did you?” I was embarrassed at the idea that Marnie knew about our new plan. I wasn’t sure that she’d understand.

It had all been my idea – and was just as brilliant as the council flat scam in my opinion. I’d thought it up a day or so after failing my A levels so spectacularly. I think it was partly because of that, and also because of T going off with his new girlfriend and us hardly seeing him anymore. Suddenly it had felt as if everything was changing and I didn’t want it to. The idea of both of them disappearing was too horrible to think of.

It hadn’t started out as much more than a joke idea in my head, but once it had come out of my mouth it had actually sounded like quite a good plan – certainly a fun thing to do - that if we reached thirty unattached, we should get married. Once I’d suggested it, I’d wondered if Joel would laugh at me, but he didn’t at all. He’d said he couldn’t see why not, and obviously, the ring had been a continuation of the joke.

I’d felt much happier after that day. It meant the future was all taken care of, and so I didn’t need to bother worrying about it anymore. The only thing was, I didn’t think he ought to have told Marnie about it, in case she got the wrong idea.

“Oh I didn’t say anything about that part. I was just checking about the size and stuff. It’s not like it’s serious anyway”

Joel stood up to go and get more drinks, tucking the envelope back into his jacket pocket. He looked at me and smiled;

“Tequila sunrise to celebrate?”