Admission

Admission (11th June 2008, 10.05pm)

I came back here
where I started out
to share my life with you,
surety amongst doubt
about what the future held;
at the time I didn’t know
how I would have to split in two;
I could not be both
halves of myself with you;
I was the party girl you loved,
breaking all the rules;
it was time to grow up;
I thought you were doing it too.

I came back to you,
two hundred miles,
doesn’t sound like much;
I’d made my escape,
got as far away as I could,
but I scaled the fence again,
turned myself in for love;
I could not continue to live
in your world of week-old washing up,
overflowing ashtrays
and infinite amounts of drugs;
it was time to grow up;
I thought you said it was too.

I came back home,
followed my heart,
she got me into trouble
and ripped herself apart;
I have one question:
how could I have loved you?
I knew right from the first
that one day our connection
would overflow and burst;
I poured love down the drain;
I swallowed lies like bleach;
I was trying too hard,
growing up beyond your reach.