A Quiet Forgiveness

I remember the very first time
that I saw
her

My JFK moment

Me and Nathan had been up all night
with Bessie

She didn’t fare well … .. .

The room was thick and oppressive
with the hallowed stench of
familiarity
I had to escape
Had to get away before all the
unsaids suddenly became
saids

Even Nathan didn’t deserve that specific box to be opened

Slowly I walked over to the eastern
side of the island
Past the old neglected Shuttercroft Farm
and beyond

Beyond

Beyond the blueprint that had so crudely attached
itself to my eyelids

I held my head high

I Walked on

The wind felt cathartic as it lashed against my weathered skin

Slashing

Lacerating

The ancestral grooves of my fore fathers

Then I saw her

Down in Buckle-By cove

A vision of

Purity

A vision of

Oneness

I

Was

Mesmerised

I watched from a safe distance as her tiny delicate hands moulded and sculpted
the most intricate and extraordinary shapes
that I had ever seen
in my
life

Her melancholy face emitted an illusory quality as she worked the sand

She was detached

She was isolated

I

Was

Enthralled

The wind was spiriting her long dark hair up into a wild frenzy

It was chaotic and feral yet it was so beautiful

Exquisite

Tempestuous

My new found vision was oblivious to the cold harshness of her surroundings

I continued watching

Until

Eventually

A

New

Creation was born

A new dawn

I sat there stunned in complete awe

Who was she?

Slowly she gathered herself

Stood up

Then simply walked away

I sat there

I could not move

Would not move

And that was where Nathan eventually found me later on in the day

He gently wrapped me up in his arms

Carefully lead me back to the battered old van

I saw the fear in his eyes

The fear

How could I make Nathan fear after all that had happened?

I closed my eyes

Enough