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Anyway

Posted by Louise178 on June 5, 2011 - 14:02
from the ABC set Paper Basket Poetry

This is a word sum
when I am done
will we understand...

me + you x the world turning round
not letting us stand our ground
me + you with the past
running fast, catching up
= problems mounting x 10
hearts imploding heads exploding
off, in passionate bursts of joy
me + you x 1000 bubbling gasses
explosions breaking windows
a ground breaking formulae
me + you is written on the wall
time winked winds blew
drying dark runny ink
as the sun shone on reflections
of glistening puddles full
of happy times fingers talking

me + you x 1 a perfect sum

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Comments

skinner_jennifer | June 5, 2011 - 14:08

Hi Louise178,

I like this, it's very original and makes you think.

Thanks for the read.

Jenny.

Louise178 | June 5, 2011 - 16:52

Thanks Jenny.

insertponceyfre... | June 5, 2011 - 20:41

I really like this Louise. Jenny's right - it's very original!

Silver Spun Sand | June 6, 2011 - 10:03

Original indeed, Louise;-) Tina

Louise178 | June 6, 2011 - 10:31

Thanks ABC for the cherry :)

barryj1 | June 6, 2011 - 12:34

Nice poem. I especially like the way you stripped everything down to bare, elemental essentials and, of course, the last line was best of all. Running the risk of redundancy, nice poem.

Louise178 | June 6, 2011 - 14:45

Thank you barry.

Prettyrose | June 6, 2011 - 19:50

hi Louise :) well done on a well worded poem :)))

I felt the + were a lot for me and kept me on my toes and out of breath lol But you have a obvious talent.

Keep smiling
Keep Writing :)))

Louise178 | June 6, 2011 - 20:04

Did you read the plus + as 'and' and the X as 'times' though :) I cheated !

Dynamaso | June 8, 2011 - 00:40

What a clever piece this is. I've read it a few times now and enjoy it more each time.