What the fuck God?

Lately, I've been hard to reach.
(By God)
Busy making a living.
(That's odd)
Why?
(He's been ignoring me too)
For real?
(For real, don't know what the
fuck I've been through)

Like I said, I've been hard to reach.
Keeping the food on the table.
Flying colours and images.
On the screen, paid by cable.
I worked my ass of for that to.
Feel like God showing no love.
Like he doesn't know what we've been through,
Like he has no fucking clue.
Doctors, saving people and helping.
Get paid to save, ok.
What about these poor labourers, yelping.
Like dogs on a fucking leash,
Keeps on happening.
Like life is making this into a pastiche,
People aren't seeing too clearly.
Hallucinogen effect, bastard hashish.

(Chorus)
Life is a haywire.
Just fucked up in the head.
Don't give two fucks,
about hat makers.
Dying from poison of lead.
Guarantee I would be ignored.
If I ever blead, blood pouring red.

Rappers, dancer, actors.
Doctors, nurses and teachers.
Notice a difference?
Nope, me neither.
Now, you probably thinking.
Pinda, chill out man.
Take a fucking breather.
Become the lost soul.
Just become a piss poor leaver.
But no, I'm a strong believer.
The diffrence between those six.
Is 3 are helpers and the others,
are born spoilt fucking pricks.
Earning more than a fucking labourer.
Why are you not helping us,
My saviour?

(Chorus)
Life is a haywire.
Just fucked up in the head.
Don't give two fucks,
about hat makers.
Dying from poison of lead.
Guarantee I would be ignored.
If I ever blead, blood pouring red.

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Comments

jennifer | August 7, 2009 - 12:18

'People aren't seeing to clearly.
Hallucinogen affect, bastard hashish.'

needs to be 'too' and 'effect'

Otherwise, some excellent rhymes but the rhythm is too stilted because of all your unnecessary full stops - consider replacing a few with commas or just taking them away altogether,

J x

pinda | August 7, 2009 - 13:39

Thanks Jennifer :), changed them. I will try stopping overdoing my punctuation. It's just that I write full stops, when I pause when reading or rapping it. Just a real bad habit on my behalf.

P.s. where have you been recently, been ages since i've spoken to you on here

jennifer | August 7, 2009 - 16:04

Been manic with the end of term, catching up with everything that gets neglected during term time, etc. such as my social life! I have not had much time to write or read recently! Good to hear from you!

J x

Cavalcaderl | August 7, 2009 - 16:23

New Hi! Jennifer I too been thinking
where have you been to. See your very busy.
julie x

threeleafshamrock | August 7, 2009 - 21:52

Good one Pin, lots of good stuff here!

Chris ;)