Troubled soul

I really like this pipmic

thanks ...i'm at the point of despair

i thought that by making it into shorter lines it would give it more of a desperate edge! I dont know whether it worked... Don't know where I can find some other and extra criticism of my verses.

it does work I think - quietly desperate and resigned is how it reads to me. I hope someone else comes along to comment - people are normally very generous on abc. Sorry I can't be of more help : )

Thanks....perhaps my thought process worked after all!

definitely an edgy piece and another good one you get the feelings across very well.
;)

thanks wolf...much appreciated. I often feel that if a poem doesnt rhyme, that somehow it falls short of appreciation.

I know tcook can't give cherries all the time but I wish I could be guided or advised where it is that I'm failing in his estimation!!!

Its always brilliant to get cherries but there are loads of stories posted all the time and the vast majority are worthy of cherries but they can't all get one. Don't beat yourself up about it; there's nothing wrong with your work and i'm sure the cherries will come.

gosh ..thanks wolf for you support

np ;)