Any Old Jerusalem

Gold cherry
Poem of the week

By ralph

Tue, 14 Feb 2023
  • 717 reads
10 comments
 

On the laps of our beloved smoking mothers –
I heard them talk about the world
when they were young.

The festooned nights of war-torn bingo halls –
where everything was just about right and unjust
about wrong. Where no one owned a phone.

How Steph danced with a Stepney Elvis –
love me tender, love me true. The mortgage 
and the factory belt. The disappointment of the pill.

Gloria and her boy from Des Moines. 
That morning he found God, the evening she found gin.
Waving him off at Tilbury Docks. Another sailor, every sin.

And Julie wondering how to make ends meet.
As she pushes the roundabout, rocks the swing.
Beans and bread in a plastic bag, snagging on a ring.

Yes. I can still see them on abandoned mornings –
alone with scratched blankets for their winter ghosts.
Cigarettes in mouth. Eyes down. Enraged of England.

 

 

 

Image:When Docklands Meant Docks by Peter Jeffery (Wiki Commons) 

 

Certificate U
Poem
Love

Comments

Submitted by catherine poarch on

I feel like you've caught a place and an era. Loads of short, apt, loaded descriptions that catch eyes and brain, like 'snagging on a ring.'  

 

Submitted by Mark Burrow on

Congrats -- this excellent poem about an England from a different time is our Pick of the Day.

Do share on social media if you can.  

 

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

Really enjoyed this visit to the past - so beautifully done. Congratulations on the golden cherries Ralph!

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

You are definitely on my wavelength with this poem. So much of it stirs the memories of another time.Nostalgia is something I always enjoy reading.

More please.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by airyfairy on

'That morning he found God, that evening she found gin.' What a brilliant line. Evoking that time so well. I could hear my mother and her relatives saying all these things.

Submitted by lenchenelf on

Seems famliar from your past collection, is this a re-write?

best

Lena x

 

Submitted by ralph on

Yes. It's a rewrite. I have been working with my PhD supervisor on extending some of my poems a little. It's a dangerous game, whereby balance could be lost by going too far. I decided to bring the characters of 3 women into the poem, to try and give hints of their stories. The poem is not there yet, but it's close. Thank for liking it. 

 

Submitted by lenchenelf on

Yes tricky, in dismantling ( literary toffee hammer) may lose central coherance of your muse. Good stuff tho'

Not for me to tweak, though an interesting addition would be a subtext of observed competative dynamic between the women, who, non conforming through circumstance to top down acceptable standards, had their own internal heirarchy...maybe for another poem?

best to you Lena x

 

 

Submitted by Ewan on

Well done!

Author Page at the 'Zon
 

Submitted by agnosticnun on

Lovely and haunting, congratulations on Poem of the Week!

Kristi