A woman pushes a shopping trolley;
a man, over a coffee, peruses the paper.
In a cyber-cafe, crowds are mesmerised
by the screens of computers.
A vagrant’s told to leave with nowhere to go
after falling asleep at his table.
A baby in a buggy screams his lungs out;
his mother makes love to her mobile phone.
Thomas Cook is bursting at the seams –
bulging with brochures, magazines...
I’m in two minds whether to buy that dress.
Outside – it’s raining cats and dogs.
Might go back to M & S and try it on.
A tramp moves on through an automatic door.
Comments
Beeme | January 28, 2010 - 21:02
I think this is very powerful poem, Tina. I love the trail of thoughts at the end in stark contrast with reality.
These lines were especially effective for me, "A baby in a buggy screams his lungs out; his mother makes love to her mobile phone." and also sadly very true.
Another great poem ;-)
Beeme xx
Silver Spun Sand | January 28, 2010 - 21:44
Beeme - thank you. There is wisdom in your words.
Tina XX
Nathan Bednarek | January 28, 2010 - 23:51
Beeme pretty much said it, but I'll just add that your poetry never fails to amaze me. The honesty in this piece makes one think ;-)
I too really like the lines quoted by Beeme.
Just perfect. Well done.
Nathan.
Silver Spun Sand | January 29, 2010 - 00:05
Nathan, obviously great minds think alike - yours and Beeme's.
My thanks to you. Hang on in there;-)
Tina xox
Dynamaso | January 29, 2010 - 05:09
Personally, I preferred the lines:
"A vagrant's told to leave with nowhere to go"
So simple yet so powerful. This is another pearl in your collection, Tina.
Silver Spun Sand | January 29, 2010 - 08:55
Thank you so much for reading, Dynamaso and for your appreciative comment. It means much...and I think you made an inspired choice;-)
Tina
kheldar | January 29, 2010 - 11:13
I love the simple yet effective contrast in the final stanza, the tramp with nowhere to go while you decide wether or not to get (another) new dress.
Loved it xx
P.S. Go get the dress but buy a copy of the Big Issue on the way.
Silver Spun Sand | January 29, 2010 - 11:16
I might just do that, kheldar - buy the dress, I mean. I always, but always buy Big Issue though;-)
My thanks to you for reading.
Tina
tcook | January 29, 2010 - 13:59
No 'e' on Thomas Cook!
I like this but I think the Punters make their choice verse spoils it - it becomes moralising rather than observational.
Silver Spun Sand | January 29, 2010 - 15:05
Gosh - I'm really sorry about the 'e' Tony and I guess you should know. And I agree with you, hands down, on readng it again, about that stanza, so have dispensed with it. You are inspired;-) Thank you.
tina
MistakenMagic | January 29, 2010 - 17:20
A brilliant look at everyday life, Tina! There's so much beauty in the truth of this poem ;)
Magic xxx
Silver Spun Sand | January 29, 2010 - 17:22
'Beauty in truth'...is a good line, Magic;-) A poem in itself, I feel.
Glad you enjoyed;-)
Tina xxx
tcook | January 29, 2010 - 17:28
I do think that improves it - thankyou for listening!
Silver Spun Sand | January 29, 2010 - 18:47
Thank you for speaking...perfect sense. I saw exactly what you meant and I have certainly learned another lesson. What life is all about, I guess;-)
Tina
Kachina | February 1, 2010 - 18:56
A woman pushes a shopping trolley;
a man, over a coffee, peruses the paper.
I particularly like these lines. I love the way you write x
Silver Spun Sand | February 1, 2010 - 19:35
Kachina - I like the way you write, too. Your comment was very kind. Thank you for reading and for your interest in my work and I look forward to reading more of yours. Congratulations again, on your more than deserved cherry, by the way;-)
Tina x