Hey Mista Sea-Gull, what’s you doin’ here man
You supposed to be at sea an not in here on my land
If you don’ mind me sayin’, dats an awsome back flap
You jus’ smothered twenty worms man, wit your last crap
Now I’s the rappin’ blackbird an’ I is well fit
But I didn’t get this bad bod by eatin’ Sea-Gull shit
Cos when tings gets hard here an I can’t get a dish
I don’t fly out in the ocean and start crappin on yo fish
I chomped a worm dis morning an thought my throat was stabbed
Turns out, what’s in my wind hole was de asshole of a crab
Well really Mister Blackbird, if it’s embarrassment you seek
You’re doing rather well; there’s a blush come to my beak
Every bird must defecate, as I’m sure you’re well aware
And making such a scene as this; well, it really isn’t fair
I only ventured inland because there’s a storm at sea
And when you refer to this as your land; I’m afraid I can’t agree.
A greater power made this world; I’m sure you’ve heard it said
And there are no strict rules stating, where we get our daily bread
There really are no boundaries; by the way, I must express,
Eating fish is very healthy and would SO reduce your stress.
The Bird-God inda sky made some food for all of us
An de man gets what he doin, you knows he got it sussed
He makin worms for the blackbirds and fish fo all da gulls
Ain’t nowhere says I should be eatin fishes' shitted skulls
Hey fish is probbly healthy cos you eats it ever’ day
An you is one big motherfugger; thats I gotta say
But it could gets unhealthy an I hopes I’s understood
If you keep crappin on the food chain, when you is in my hood
Now I don look for trouble; gots enough with ‘Farmer John’
But eatin all dis Gull-shit’s givin me a bad hard-on
So fly away Peter, fly away Paul
Fly away Sea-Gull or there could be a brawl
You know what I’s sayin?
Comments
scoot | July 15, 2009 - 01:14
This really dealt with my wednesday morning blues. My favourite line of many would have to be
I chomped a worm dis morning an thought my throat was stabbed
Turns out, what’s in my wind hole was de asshole of a crab
Truly, my eyes are watering! Really great.
Karen
threeleafshamrock | July 15, 2009 - 01:38
Lol, thanks Karen, imagine how poor old blackbird rappers eyes were watering ;) My favourite too; just goes to show, assholes can be funny too ;)
Glad you enjoyed
Chris xx
scoot | July 15, 2009 - 01:41
it's the gift that keeps on giving...here i am having another laugh just thinking about it~!
K
threeleafshamrock | July 15, 2009 - 01:47
Life's to short for serious shit (excuse the pun) all the time; you gotta have a laugh every now and then LOL.
sarah wilson | July 15, 2009 - 08:52
And this has set me up for the day Chris. Excuse me while I go and get a tissue......Great stuff. sarah x
threeleafshamrock | July 15, 2009 - 10:36
Thanks Sarah, glad to be of service ;)
pinda | July 15, 2009 - 23:07
Lol brilliant work Chris lol.
This was my favorite part
"Cos when tings gets hard here an I can’t get a dish
I don’t fly out in the ocean and start crappin on yo fish"- couldn't stop laughing.
Great work dude,lol. This has made my day.
threeleafshamrock | July 15, 2009 - 23:18
Lol, glad you enjoyed it Pin...I had a laugh doing it; trying to cheer myself up haha.
Nathan Bednarek | July 22, 2009 - 19:53
Loved it! I think that blackbird had a very good reason to complain ;-)
More please!
Nathan.
threeleafshamrock | July 23, 2009 - 08:54
lol, thanks Nathan ;)
Miss_D_Meaner | September 14, 2009 - 01:13
Love this! It's great!
threeleafshamrock | September 14, 2009 - 07:14
Thanks again Miss D. ;)
Miss_D_Meaner | September 15, 2009 - 14:37
I read this again. It's great!
and fish for all da gulls..... just great.
Miss_D_Meaner | September 15, 2009 - 14:56
I thought I'd say that I keep visualising this on TOTP. Two birds singing and rapping. Would make a great number one! Hope you don't mind me saying.
threeleafshamrock | September 15, 2009 - 17:04
I can't argue with that Miss D. I know lot of people who sing like a crow too lol.
Thanks for coming back (try out 'Christmas Cock-up', think you might like it) ;) XXX
Miss_D_Meaner | September 15, 2009 - 18:21
Hilarious - Christmas-Cock-up. (Not for TOTP though!) lol
threeleafshamrock | September 15, 2009 - 18:43
Lol, no - more for BOTH - Bottom of the heap! Ha-ha!
threeleafshamrock | September 15, 2009 - 18:45
Lol, no - more for BOTH - Bottom of the heap! Ha-ha!
You might like 'Driving Lesson' too - might as well keep promoting myself; it's not everyday someone comes along who is as daft as I am LOL.
XXX ;)