Today young earth is bathed
in His best gold
the warm hillocks shaped
by Creation and Flood -
perfect arcs and angel-trees
moulded by His own hand.
The earth is a reflection
of the greater image -
the holy river of solid belief -
and the scriptural geologist
points westward to where
the sky is much darker, so
dark that he adjusts his top hat
in stern reprimand of the
pegmatite and siluran beds
(handiwork of the devil)
the pagan forests
where farm-boys
and their dogs idle away
into mischief.
He rakes raw earth
with his walking stick
seeking out God's minerals,
pokes the glittering pre-Cambrian
slopes, prays at the sheer
rock-wall of his faith.
"Father, O Father!" says his daughter and lifts
her petticoat by a stream
dips her feet into unfamiliar
waters, washes an unreformed stone
she has found there. But deep in prayer
he does not see or hear
as she holds it to the sun,
tempted by the faintest image -
a forgotten creature that dragged
itself onto shore,
stood upright to be
prized as her treasure.
Comments
maisie | July 4, 2011 - 17:52
hello Kilb50,
I like your narrative poem, however it seems to need a stronger start, because you keep mentioning 'he' and 'his' without saying who or what 'he' or 'his' is.
as it progresses it gets better, i like your imagery and discriptive passages. I think I'd like to read more.
thanks
Kilb50 | July 4, 2011 - 18:18
Hi Maisie - Thanks for your comment. There is a tradition, dating from the Victorian period I think, that capitalises the personal pronoun of the Almighty as an act of reverence. The first nine lines of the poem describe the Malvern Hills as seen through the eyes of the Scriptual Geologist before the poem re-aligns itself and addresses the geologist in the third person. I wanted to contrast the geologist's rather stern - & Victorian - idea of nature with the joyous discovery of the fossil by his daughter. Thanks for reading!
fatboy74 | July 6, 2011 - 20:10
Echoes of Arthur Machen and until you explained the Father/Daughter situation - I was thinking of Francis Kilvert. Took the dog on the Malverns this afternoon and although the view east to the cotswolds is beautiful, the view west to the Black Mountains takes your breath away. Always a pleasure to read your stuff Kilb. :-)