Blessed are the Children

Hi Shirley,

I'll do the "but" first, i,e the juxtaposition of the relationship with one's religion and with one's parents is a simple enough idea. However, your use of religious language in a domestic situation is so veru clever and incredibly pertinent. I gave up religion when it became nothing more than duty, it is a harder call and a harder decision when dealing with one's parents.

Once again you have peeled away the top layer of your experience leaving us to wonder at the stort that lies beneath.

David xxx :--)

I like it - the poem can mean so much to so many different people coming from so many different backgrounds.
:-)

Hi David, I have used religious references before, It's a sort of cheat really. Although I am not at all religious in the traditional sense, I find the language very moving. I thank you for your insightful and astute comments (as always) Parents of course have an effect on all of us, for better or worse!
Tough call? yes, but I'm getting better at it.
Shirley, :}

P.S Can you really give up religion, like smoking, or hope?

Thank you Canary Islander, Pleased you like my little effort.:}

Hi Shirley,

It was easy to give up when I was 12, it took me another 30 odd years to realise that a lack of sprirituality (as opposed to religion) was a big hole in my life.

David xxx

was?

I've gradually been getting into Western Buddhism. I went on a retreat to learn some meditation techniques but it opened my eyes to there being more to life than just material things.

Wonderful combination of two different themes, Shirley! I especially loved:

'The miles tick by
on a rosary string.

We invent our own liturgy;
'best change the subject'
'don't rise to the bait'
'they mean well''

Really well done ;)

Magic xxx

Very powerful! I really enjoyed the metaphor.

Just one thing, a niggle, there's the odd bit of punctuation missing, which could easily be corrected and then the writing would be as technically perfect as it is poetically,

J x

Thanks Magic, I too like the rosary string line, I wanted to get rosary bead in somewhere, but I couldn't get it to fit!

Thanks jennifer,

I fiddled with the punctuation for ages on this, it's not my strong point, and had a feeling something was amiss, I still can't see it though. would you be so kind as to make your sugestions?

Shirley

Hey, it's mainly right, and often down to personal style, but I feel it should be this: (sorry for long post - easier to copy and paste whole poem to show you what I'd do!):

Twice a year
we make this pilgrimage.

The miles tick by
on a rosary string.

We invent our own liturgy: (colon)
'best change the subject'; (semi-colons for phrase lists)
'don't rise to the bait'; ( " )
'they mean well'. (full stop to end sentence)

We kneel at the alter
of our fathers (and mothers)
repenting, resenting, relieved.

Every small tale is a confession.

We hold out our hands for the eucharist
and try not to choke on the host,
washing it down with sacremental tea.

We leave absolved, forgiven, blessed.
Like any miracle, (capital 'L' to start a sentence) - and I think the comma, too)
it doesn't even last until we get home.

Hope this helps?

Great poem, re-reading it this morning it's even more powerful!

J x

Thanks for your help jennifer, much appreciated, I left out the semi-colons, it looked like too much on the page.

Shirley :}

OOh, just noticed cherry, sure improved punctuation played a part, so thanks again jennifer.

No worries ;)

J x

Hello Julie,
Thank you for your lovely long comment, spirituality is a very individual thing as you say.

I understand your concern about my use of tea instead of wine, In this instance I have used it metaphoriclly
and therefore it is not it's literal meaning.

I hope this clears things up for you.

best wishes
Shirley

well done on the cherry, richly deserved.
;)

.

.Shoe sometimes it can be the only thing people
have and do for changing lives.
And my opinion, prayer's, and sprituality
is the thing done all over the world.
But you have put it into a fun poem.
We have Nolan and David, and many more on
AbcTales and all over the World, and for
the Troops, Praying to change everything.
But I disagree, with you putting it into
a funny context Poem. This is very sacred
to thousands.MILLIONS ARE PRAYED FOR.
Must go. You could have done any subject
bar this. Many have been healed! and many
are to-day. We are all sinner's but forgiven.
must go. Maybe I have it wrong, and must read
The Code of Practice on Here! AbcTales.com
I haven't been church for over year, busy.
If you have been to the shrines etc;
Then why be against it all. The spitfire? has spoken[now? Really upset think you think this way,
we are all different. God said "suffer little children come unto me. What is happening to the world take fun, ou of religion, one befor someone did, called OUR FATHER= IS The LORD'S' PRAYER
and tried the same.
Everyone has a point of view, thing's can be funny but certainly not This, to me. And so many in the world.= Forgive.
Must go.
julie

well done on the cherry, richly deserved. I really enjoyed :)

Beeme xx

Hei shoe, really like this details especially, rosary beads tick by miles' am writing religiousy things at mo too, you can quit, it like smoking, easier for some people & depend how addicted or devouted you were, I quit both very easily, now I have more in good people, love, lucky charms or superstitions (which I stick to like commandments)& anything I can wish on! maybe still have a little belief for angels... kheldar, good to hear you can fill the hole, buddhism is good, faith is the most important thing ;) K