At first he confused her
With his fantasy
Of women in dark corridors
Whose high thighs and tip tap heels
Drew his breath
And captured his innocence
Later he mistook her
For the women
In his recurrent dreams
Whose soft skin and dark eyes
Quickened his pulse
And broke beads of sweat on his brow
Confounded
She played the part
Slipping on the mantle of temptress
And the mask of muse
But the colours of excitement quickly faded
And the fabric of her subjugation frayed
He saw her naked
And did not know her.
Comments
animan | April 28, 2008 - 17:22
Tell me about it ... No, but, great poem - I laughed and I cried at its perspicacity and focus. I like every line - I like every line break. There's no flab in this piece - it's all taut and tight!
sunshine | April 29, 2008 - 07:29
Thank you so much for such a positive comment - I appreciate it as much as I have appreciated previous suggestions you've made. I'm glad you liked this. Margot
Ewan | April 29, 2008 - 08:53
Yes I concur with Animan, you have really nailed something with this poem.
It's a rare thing when fantasy survives reality.
The last couplet is a diamond.
Well done.
Ewan
sunshine | April 29, 2008 - 19:48
thank you Ewan
LeighM | May 1, 2008 - 12:22
Ouch - it all goes wrong when he sees her in the nude!!
I really like this too (though I am not usually a poetry fan). There is something so dark and sexy about it - until reality sets in with the humorous final two lines.
sunshine | May 3, 2008 - 09:09
thank you Leigh - I'm delighted that someone less than enthusiastic about poetry not only read this but liked it. Margot
sunshine | May 3, 2008 - 09:09
thank you - I'm delighted that someone less than enthusiastic about poetry not only read this but liked it. Margot