Tipped over by a feather

Cherry

By Highhat

Sun, 30 Oct 2011
  • 660 reads
19 comments
 

when the light shines
it will ease
smooth
for everyone
close
foggy melancholia
lifts
comforting though
a feather may tip over the load
to ask for mercy
the primal lesson
love promised
defying hair thin borders
bailing for aeons
sunrise bringing on the child
wistfully brushing
warm skin
with yet another starry-eyed gaze
one sign is drawn
and the stroke is near perfection
a blank page
the innocent
an unknown quantity

Certificate U
Poem
Autobiography

Comments

Submitted by fatboy74 on
I love this Pia, particularly the second half which meanders wonderfully. Suits no punctuation perfectly - I like how your poems just don't care, they say what they say and fuck all that's come before; that's really refreshing. :-)

 

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
I couldn't have put it better than fb, Pia;-) Another little gem from your pen;-) Tina

 

Submitted by Highhat on
That was a lovely comment Fatboy- really makes me happy about my work.. Thank you very much. ;)Pia

Submitted by Highhat on
Thanks Tina for reading and your kind comment. I'll sleep peacefully now... ;)Pia

Submitted by Highhat on
Thanks for the cherry Ed.. ;)

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Pia, this poem has such a velvety feel to it, gentle and peaceful...so tranquil. It works for me on so many levels, because it flows so well. Your descriptions in this poem are amazing, with words I can only describe as soothing. Definitely one of my favourites of yours. Congrats on the cherries and thankyou for sharing. Jenny.

 

Submitted by Beeme on
I agree with all that has been said. A very enjoyable read and some really beautiful imagery. beeme xx

k.

Submitted by Highhat on
Thank you so much for your eloquent comment Jenny- made me so happy... glad you enjoyed it and yes I was trying to convey something soothing- so pleased you picked up on it... ;)Pia

Submitted by Highhat on
Thank you very much Beeme. Really appreciate you reading.. ;)Pia

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new Highhat Really enjoyed. And it;s images, and calming effects. And well deserved cherries! Now snuggle down sleep well. julie x

Submitted by maggyvaneijk on
Wow, I agree with Julie such a calming effect with your trade mark eloquent style. The ending is sheer perfection. What a master piece!

 

Submitted by Overthetop1 on
Oh this is just great writing Pia. Completely stunning. It's got the wow factor alright. So glad it got a cherry too.

Overthetop1

Submitted by Highhat on
Thanks Maggy, Sundays and Ott. I truly value your comments. Thanks for reading this one. You have all made my day. I'm so grateful for your wonderful comments. ;)Pia

Submitted by MistakenMagic on
"and the stroke is near perfection a blank page the innocent an unknown quantity" - brilliant last lines, Pia. The lack of punctuation really works. Well done on the cherry! Magic xxx

 

Submitted by Highhat on
Thank you very much Magic. Your words are valued. ;)Pia

Submitted by seashore on
The word `smooth' comes to mind Pia - I've no idea why - anyway it was a lovely read. x

Submitted by Highhat on
Thanks for reading Coral- nice to know you are battling through.. ;)Pia

Submitted by Savx on
As promised, I read another one of your pieces! I'm glad that I did, because this one was a very good one, too! The cherries are muched deserved! Merry Christmas, Savannah

Sav

Submitted by Highhat on
And a Merry Christmas to you Savannah- glad you got so much from this one- thanks for reading and telling me your thoughts. ;)Pia