Last Minute Present

He knew this would happen, it always did. He should have bought the bloody thing at the weekend, but no, he went to football instead. He promised himself he would do it on Sunday, but once again never got round to it. One phone call from the lads and he was straight down the pub!

Now it was the day, the big day. His wifes Birthday!

He hadn't even got her a card yet, left that till the bloody last moment as well. Here he was driving home from work without a bloody present.

Still, all was not lost. There was a 24 hour Tesco on the way home, they sold everything, didn't they?

Yes, of course they do. He'll get a card and some posh perfume, can't go wrong with posh perfume can you.

Chanel, thats it, thank god for Chanel. He knew she liked it, he'd seen some on her bedside table. It was expensive as well, thats good, she'll like that, the more expensive the better!

Ten minutes later he was in Tesco car park. It was just gone 7.30 pm.

He ran into the store and bought a card within seconds. "Happy Birthday to my Dearest Wife". Fantastic, just the job.

He then spotted a perfume counter next to the pharmacy bit.

" A bottle of Chanel please young lady", he said with a confident smile.

" 50ml is £63, and the 100ml is £105, sir" she smiled at him instantly knowing he would go for the more expensive.

" 100ml of course sweetheart!"

She put it in a bag and he ran back to the car. He wrote the card with an old argos pen that he found on the floor next to the front seat.

Fifteen minutes later he was opening his front door. He felt a sense of relief, job done!

He kissed his wife on the lips and shouted "Happy Birthday my beautiful Darling". He then handed her the card and present.

She just smiled, knowing full well that he'd probably stopped somewhere on the way home to get it all. But no worries at least he'd remembered this year! She read the card and said thank you. She then started to undo the present.

Time seemed to go slowly at this point, the wrapper came off the perfume and she looked at the box at exactly the same time as he did. Thats when he saw it, two words that were to cut deep into his soul. Two words that summed up his whole gift buying experience, two words that could destroy their evening. The two words were

POUR HOMME.