...give your characters a long life, right through to the end
don't waste my time getting to know them, learning to care, to love
then in a power trip -I'm the writer and I can - moment, kill them off.
Make your heroine (she is a heroine, right?) smart, sassy, cynical
avoid gullible, vulnerable, naive
Do not let her fall in love.
Give her a friend, a loyal trustworthy friend
-for I'd like to know what that's like-
But do not - however tempting - betray that trust
make me believe it.
And give the Villain (there's always a villain, right ?)
a tiny bit of him that's good
-make him kind to animals or love his grandmother or a poet-
give him some hope, some chance of redemption, some love,
and make him sorry.
When they meet (and they will meet) they will be drawn to each other,
Beware...
Do not let them kiss, Do not let them have sex,
Do not let them fall in love.
If (despite my warnings) tragedy befalls them
- from a great height, out of the blue, head over heels-
resolve it in twenty pages, do not let the pain go on and on
chapter after chapter, finish it, let them move on.
And make it a happy ending, sunsets and rainbows, do not fuck this up
you're a writer, imagine.
Comments
skinner_jennifer | January 6, 2011 - 13:02
Very good advice shoe.
Jenny.
insertponceyfre... | January 6, 2011 - 15:02
brilliant!
Silver Spun Sand | January 6, 2011 - 17:33
This is so original, Shirley. Well deserving of its cherry;-)
Tina
JoseHdz | January 6, 2011 - 18:56
clever!
Highhat | January 6, 2011 - 18:59
Funny AND clever
;)Pia
Kahdai | January 6, 2011 - 23:08
I like it and it made me smile even though it is kindof
sad isnt it? And found it funny hope it meant to be K x
MistakenMagic | January 6, 2011 - 23:58
I love the straight-talking voice of the narrator - a wonderful realist, but with lots of heart ;) Well done on the cherry!
Magic xxx
shoe | January 7, 2011 - 11:41
Thank you everyone, I'm glad you seemed to enjoy it.
Blighters...I kinda hoped they wouldn't get killed off. but you're the writer, I am at your mercy.
I don't know....sometimes unhappy endings are just too much to bear, too real, you need to have good defences.
fatboy74 | January 7, 2011 - 17:45
I am never sure when I come to your poems from what angle I am approaching, which is a wonderful gift - originality and the voice to put it across and not being afraid to use the word fuck evry now and then. Just wonderful Shoe. :-)
shoe | January 8, 2011 - 18:14
Hmm.. it does sound a bit facetious, Guess I've been reading too many books that use tragedy in an attempt to make them um, powerful or moving or something. Actually I don't want sugar sweet endings,(I hate Disney) just a life goes on and it's O.K kind of ending, (turtle diaries comes to mind) sorry I grated on you BR.
FB, I hardly ever swear in real life, it feels good to do it incognito.
kheldar | February 8, 2011 - 17:47
A fantastically original piece, though I'm not sure my novel, despite having a heroine, will ever fit the bill.
:--) xxx
marionwozere | March 11, 2011 - 10:30
I love it! Especially the 'incognito' swearing at the end, really made me laugh. I think the way you've given familiar stereotypes a fresh perspective is really clever...and very funny :)