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Comments
Posted on Wed, 06 Aug 2014
I cannot over stress the importance of commenting on other writers' work. The benefits aren't just the obvious ones of providing feedback and recieving reciprocal comments yourself. The hidden benefit is that your own writing standard will...
Read full commentPosted in Dust
Good
Posted on Sat, 15 Aug 2015
Well if this is your first poem you've got real potential as your experience and practise grows. I really quite like this piece although romance poetry is not something that I would actively seek out. A couple of observations if I may?
...
Read full commentPosted in first poem not great
A column of comments is often
Posted on Thu, 25 Sep 2014
A column of comments is often a barometer of the talent of the writer and the quality of their submissions. I'd like to add to the column. I missed this one Philip, don't quite know how.
I like the whole thing but especially the simple...
Read full commentPosted in Smoke
I'd like to see the first
Posted on Sat, 06 Sep 2014
I'd like to see the first stanza given a looking at. Make the sting and the urgency that lives in this great poem hit right from the start. Very excellent nonetheless. Congratulations on the pick.
Read full commentPosted in Time-Lined
Edit Suggestions
Posted on Wed, 06 Aug 2014
I like the opening sentence - straight into the action with no spoiling preamble. I'm less keen on the way that Ahora 'deemed' it to be 'of sufficient width' I get that you are trying to instil an aura of other...
Read full commentPosted in Under the Ice (2)
Ok
Posted on Sun, 06 Jul 2014
Your writing is convincing and packed with intrigue and excitement.
Read full commentPosted in Chapter One: The Old Compton Street Murder
A second piece from you - a
Posted on Sat, 08 Feb 2014
A second piece from you - a poem this time and a damn fine one it is too. There is lots to like in this and I particularly admire the soundless feet image.
However the whole is greater than its parts and all that.
That you have...
Read full commentPosted in The Acrobat
I love this! Welcome to
Posted on Sun, 02 Feb 2014
I love this! Welcome to ABCtales Tina. Can't wait to read more..
Now, I've read it a few times and with each read I have liked it more. There is a lot going on here. A fragmented mind at work in terms of the poetic narrative perhaps. ...
Read full commentPosted in DRIP
"nicotine tarred walls(.)
Posted on Wed, 08 Jan 2014
"nicotine tarred walls(.) Many of the patients"
"that wouldn’t meet my eye, or look at me." If she wouldn't meet your eye then we know she couldn't look?
"The walls were a sickly mildew green and (the) radiator"
"ward...
Read full commentPosted in school photos 36
I just delivered an Angel
Posted on Fri, 13 Dec 2013
I just delivered an Angel Gabriel costume to school for my son (see left) despite me being a born again atheist. He has been revelling in his new found God-given super powers that include balls of powerful light that he can throw at enemies and...
Read full commentPosted in Julian Asks About The Nativity Play ( Christmas Special)
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