New definitions
These apparently come from the Washington Post:
Abdicate (v.), ---------to give up all hope of ever having a flat
stomach.
Esplanade (v.), --------to attempt an explanation while drunk.
Willy-nilly (adj.), ------impotent
Flabbergasted (adj.),--appalled over how much weight you have gained.
Negligent (adj.),-------describes a condition in which you absentmindedly
answer the door in your nightie.
Lymph (v.),---------- to walk with a lisp.
Gargoyle (n.),--------- an olive-flavored mouthwash.
Coffee (n.),------------ a person who is coughed upon.
Flatulence (n.)-------- the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you
are run over by a steamroller.
Balderdash (n.),------ a rapidly receding hairline.
Semantics (n.),-------- pranks conducted by young men studying for the
priesthood including such things as gluing the pages of the priest's
priest's book together just before vespers.
Rectitude (n.),-------- the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a
proctologist immediately before he examines you.
Oyster (n.),------------ a person who sprinkles his conversation with
Yiddish expressions.
Circumvent (n.),------ the opening in the front of boxer shorts.
Frisbatarianism (n.),-- The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up
on the roof and gets stuck there.
Pokemon(n)------------A Jamaican proctologist
Can you add any more?