Great feedback

10 Votes

Comments

Posted on Wed, 06 Aug 2014

I cannot over stress the importance of commenting on other writers' work.  The benefits aren't just the obvious ones of providing feedback and recieving reciprocal comments yourself.  The hidden benefit is that your own writing standard will...

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Posted in Dust

4 Votes

Not at all, but you don't

Posted on Mon, 31 Aug 2015

Not at all, but you don't want repetition. In the second line you have the word "air" twice and only five words apart. The fourth line has "with every" twice, once again only a few words apart. It may seem petty but these are the things that stop...

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Posted in Chapter 2: Gone (John)

4 Votes

Came for crying tree stayed

Posted on Mon, 17 Aug 2015

Came for crying tree stayed for hard drugs. 8/8

Welcome to the site, you can't leave.

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Posted in Weeping Willow

4 Votes

Oh Tina, So heart wrenching, :)

Posted on Thu, 03 Apr 2014

smileyOh Tina, This is such a powerful, beautiful, well expressed poem, yet heart...

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Posted in Today I Wrote a Poem

3 Votes

tragic, like you I don't have

Posted on Sat, 01 Dec 2018

tragic, like you I don't have an answer. Poverty, not morals is the key. We use the latter as a scapegoat, a standared practice by, for example, Jenhovah Witnesses to get a foot in the door, is to say how much worse the world is getting. They've...

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Posted in When Death Comes Too Soon

3 Votes

I really enjoyed reading this

Posted on Tue, 30 Oct 2018

I really enjoyed reading this because off the brilliant descriptive prose.it also was making me think on different levels clearly the literate short story as it stands then is almost like a bit of george orwell inspired making me think socio...

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Posted in The Empathy Files. The Angel of Empathy (1)

3 Votes

I really enjoyed reading this

Posted on Wed, 26 Sep 2018

I really enjoyed reading this, it brought to life a typical suprmarket shift complete with misery and the type of characters which seem to crop up in most workplaces. It recall my own stint in 'provisions', I got a verbal warning for failing to...

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Posted in Rolling in the Aisles

3 Votes

Thank you for this, Kevin. I

Posted on Mon, 07 Aug 2017

Thank you for this, Kevin. I have a copy of Bound for Glory on my nightstand. (Do read Woody Guthrie: A Life by Joe Klein.) Still trying to find a footing after great loss. You lose your sense of self and wonder if you'll ever get it back. Those...

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Posted in You, me and Woody Guthrie

3 Votes

Hi, Jay. I agree with Elsie

Posted on Fri, 05 Dec 2014

Hi, Jay. I agree with Elsie here. I've read a few of your pieces and it seems to me that these are your personal views (I apoligise if I've misunderstood). These are questions being asked ever increasingly in England, as well as the rest of the U...

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Posted in WHAT'S GOING ON IN OUR COUNTRY?

3 Votes

Good

Posted on Sat, 15 Aug 2015

Well if this is your first poem you've got real potential as your experience and practise grows. I really quite like this piece although romance poetry is not something that I would actively seek out.  A couple of observations if I may?

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Posted in first poem not great

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