Star Trek (2009).

Star Trek has got a bit like Star Wars trading on nostagia rather than storyline, but the former goes back further and was there at the start of the telly universe.

Star Trek (2009) I grew up with Star Trek. It was one of the highlights of my week, which just goes to show what kind of deprived childhood I had. An extra edge was given to it by knowing or not knowing whether we would be able to watch it. My brothers and sisters weren’t as addicted as me, but they hadn’t been brought up by Spock as Dessy. It was illogical to watch Star Trek because there was always something on the other side. We had three channels then. Spoiled rotten. Star Trek was a BBC 2 tea-time show. William Shartner before the hair weave and Leonard Nimoy were Capt James T Kirk and Spock respectively. Uhuru, the black chick, had one whole episode devoted to her doing some kind of snake dance. Scotty, had a song devoted to him ‘Star Trekking over the universe.’ Dr McCoy (De Forest Kelly) was another stalwart who could cure Jim of anything, but jumping up in the air and giving his assailant one in the chin with the smooth toe of his right foot. Many a young child had to explain to their mum that they were sorry they would have to spend the rest of their lives in wheelchairs because they’d tried one of those kicks and landed on their tail-bone (or cox). There was also Checkov. He was vaguely Eastern European and did that whistling noise when he beamed people on and off planets. So…the whole backstory of these characters in a film that takes two hours and as a bonus, a young Spock and an old Spock-the original Leonard Nimoy. Two for the price of one deal. James Tiberius Kirk is shown as a boy driving a racing car his head barely above the steering wheel. Anything less than ninety and the car skidding off a cliff would be an insult. Next he’s the guy that hits on a young Uhuru and who can blame him he’s hit everybody else in the universe with one of his famous fly-kicks. Obviously this is back story and he hasn’t learned how to hover yet and takes a bit of a pasting. What was needed then was a craggy captain coming in and tell him to get his life sorted and come join the academy, what with his brilliant, off the scorecard IQ (yes they had that sort of thing) he was a natural to be…well just like his poor old dad…who died defending dipsticks. I was betting on Jim winning him over and destroying the poor Klingons, or whatever else they were called, but William Hill wouldn’t take my bet.