I love the inspiral carpets

So, where do they sell these carpets then? The ones with pictures of Sabi flies from the dark side of Proxima Centauri sitting on office chairs smoking spliffs? Now there's an idea for a story!

I will point out for the record that I have been dragged into this thread through no fault of my own

Wimp. It's good for ya

How does that work then? You should try reed matting or even better wood block, great fun with a wheelie chair and a pot of wax

The nearest star, other than sol, is four light years away

Despite having about 3 million eyes, flies still can't find their way out of a room. Why is this?

smoking spliffs on the forum is prohibited.

Flash, I overrule you. Get out, now. And take your inspiral carpets with you. You can leave the track called "Dragging me Down", cos that was good. Skeeter, because they are on a mission to annoy the hell out of us, by landing with a triumphant TA DA! every thirty seconds on our face/monitor/pizza/cuppa. Do as I do, and have a can full of Weapons of Mass Destruction (available from Spar at 79p for 33ml) dangling from your belt at all times.

Yes but its true, Flash, they do! Even if you leave all the windows and doors open, they still crash around banging into things and trying to get out by going through the wall. Thank you L, I will do that. Its a war.

Well that's nice innit? i try and set up a nice non footballing thread and what happens? You whacky teenagers take advantage and start smoking weed.....i'm not sure what Lexy was on last night but it looks like it was powerful stuff. Vicky it's obvious that you subconsciously adore football, you mention a famous footie player in your statement. Liana nah you can't have "Dragging me down," i'll leave you a nice suprise in your cd player instead. *Pops Bryan Adams cd into L' s cd player* Skeets did you realise you just described what happens at closing time at my local pub. Yours Parentally(sternly) Flashy

Do they serve flies in your pub then?

Only if the chef is in a good mood.

You can find the flies by going to the hats of meat site I posted on the 'tache thread.

I did? who? I only know three, er Gary Liniker, David Beckham and Paul Gasgoign oh 4 theres that bloke from Lock Stock right? Pretty sure I didn't mention any of them...

Vicky i can't tell you because he comes from the dark side, an evil and virulant force that inhabit North London. There is a follower here who dabbles in this hells practice. But I can't even say her name S*b***e, seek her out she might be able to help.

Powerful stuff, Don't tell me you've never tried office chairing across a polished surface. personlly I prefer tarmac at night when the roads are quiet but I smashed my lights on the test run. Plastic wheels and no steering.

He'll be a French chef, then

Medic's i say MEDIC'S!!!