Fantasy Job

Nell McAndrew's G string.

oooops sorry wrong thread.

I'd be a location-finder for a film company. "Here's your corporate credit card, Karl. Off you go and find a location somewhere in the mid-west with a few rickety old bridges. We're filming something called, 'Bridges of Madison County.' And after that we need you to find a beach, anywhere in the world, but there can't be a cloud in the sky and there must be loads of topless ladies soaking up the rays. You can perhaps combine that with your third assignment of discovering a beach bar with a volleyball net outside on the sand, girls in bikinis serving and a pretty wild atmosphere. There's a £200,000 bonus if you find all three by the deadline. You've got about six months. The credit card should cover all your needs."

He must be deluded mustn't he.

Believe me Vicky, you don't want to be part in a think tank. You spend all you're time thinking up solutions to questions that no one really understands. For what it's werth................An International Spy!

God Karl that sounds great.....and of course your 'needs' would cover quite a few things too.... Oh John, I told you before.... answers I'm good at, don't need to understand the question International man of mystery huh? Suits you (pun intended)

Hay Vicky. Just had a thought? You are part of a think tank? The ABC think tank! You're which has been granted..

i'm using my inherited Welsh mining skills to dig a tunnel from my flat to the nearest railway station so that next winter, if i'm unlucky enough to have a dreary city job, I won't get wet going to work. Umbrellas are rubbish and should be banned. Would hate to be a miner mind you. Good luck to all miners, and miners that are no longer miners, is what I say. Before that happens 'tho I might be invited to become a radio dj for Vibes FM (ninety something, point something) I think you'd make a good think tank Vicky 'specially considering that the ones around at the moment are so rubbish. If I had to rely on a think tank I think I'd be wise to do the exact opposite of what the think tank recommended at any given time.

Unfortunately John, I think I'm more of the ABC tea girl jaffa cake anyone?

Now thats the best idea I've herd so far Vicky. See, now you're getting the think tank spirit?

Isn't this a contradiction in terms, Vic?

nope, workaholics annon are happy to take your call 0800 600 999

Tan, I'm in the middle of writing a feature-length poem at the moment about miners. I've been working on it for ages. If you send me your e-mail address I'll forward it to you for your opinion. Karl

but don't you have to have been sexually abused to be a lap dancer? An Idea - why don't we all become lapdancers (men and women). If we all became lap dancers then there'd be no audience (except maybe retired people and children) and they probably wouldn't want to be bothered going to lap dancing clubs. That would show the industry up to be the exploitative, sadistic, farcical thing it is. Does anyone else ever get p.ssed off being turned into a whore (man or woman) for a wage? Big up strikers and those who don't like being taken for a wage slave is what I say.

oops, sorry Karl, overlapped there. Am intrigued to find out what a feature-length poem could be. Please send.

Where IS Liana by the way? Anybody know? LIANA i need you. ABC needs you. Hope you pop in from time to time. Power to the Quiente!

Well Tan... never having been turned into a whore for a wage I'd have to say no... it doesn't piss me off. On the other hand I do get upset that I have to get out of bed in the morning so...... maybe It's the ideal career after all

Oh no, think tank better Vics! Or assassin.

HaHaHa! Now that was below the belt Vicky! If you get what I mean?

have you ever been a wage slave John do you think?

mmmm not entirely but I think the aswer is 1/4 inch (no - that's not supposed to make sense so don't try and work it out) What do you mean John?

Yes tan. I still am, but unlike lap dancers, I get payed to think?

Well Tan... never having been turned into a whore for a wage I'd have to say no... it doesn't piss me off. On the other hand I do get upset that I have to get out of bed in the morning so...... maybe It's the ideal career after all *Never turned in to a whore for a wage* *Upset to get out of bed, so maybe ideal career* That was below the belt? I thought you were being extremely funny Vic.

Ahhhh.. yes therin lies the tragedy of my life I'm only ever funny unitentionally I was actually seriously considering it as a life choice John *sighs mournfully at empty tea cup*

I didn't mean necessarily physically violated John! It was a metaphor. Never felt like you were forced into betraying your principles, or dignity or made to feel like an idiot just for being there and working? Most overrated platitude - there's dignity in work! Maybe for some hey.

Maybe you should join the priesthood Tan?

And if it's you're cup of tea vic, just remember to always carry some Jaffas?

Tan. I constantly have to defend my principals and dignity. My work is extremely controversial and is constantly under the scrutiny of people who spend all of there time trying to undermine.

You're in politics then John?

Nop!

Hiya Jones the Tanya! Have you been reading Chaucer??

My therapist has told me to cut right back Neil

You should be studying then?

yes... should be... which is unfortunately a world away from will be what can i say? I'm a lazy git

BTW Liana hasn't entirely gone, she's not far down the "Browse Members" list no doubt keeping a remote eye on us all.

Don't worry Vic. In Cambridge of yester year, the believe was that if you had to study to pass a paper, then you wern't considered to be very bright. So now get you're head down and study. Thats what I do.

why the priesthood? I don't understand, They're the biggest lapdancers of the lot aren't they?

Hmmm. Nun's Lapdancing? *Gets Down on Knee's and repents*

Send me your e-mail address, Tan, and I'll forward the poem, although it's got a long waty to go before it's finished. I'm attempting to make it witty while putting across the poor consitions miners in the 1800's had to put up with.

Tall order Karl, all power to your sense of humour! Hi Neil (hope you were joking about your sister - YKWIM -You Know What I Mean) Dear John, let us not forget it is surely a privilege to be in a position to be able to defend your principles and dignity. Many others are denied even this much, through no fault of their own.

Never a truer word said Tan. I try very hard to keep this in mined.

I don't recall mentioning my sister. Was it in a thread/a story/EMail/ at Extra Time?? (Don't think it's anything to do with the lapdancing conversation on here ...)

Are you suggesting I'm not bright enough to coast John? Tan - for some reason it just seemed to suit, probably best not to ask why Am also considering being a potter. That sounds like a nice, relaxing job

Nothing of the sort Vic. I am certain that you coast just fine.

Damn straight..... ...hang on

Dame right girl, you tell it as it is!

Well good night ABC'rs. Hope all you're fantasy's come true.

I'm up again. I had a sleazy true tale of a local girl who got a job as a lap-dancer but decided not to tell it, particularly as I prostitute myself every day working for the bank. If my fantasy comes true John I won't be here next month (no, not topping myself - I want early retirement!)

to work in a an area where you can be outgoing and friendly...... -unemployed 10 years-

and another monday morning when life seems to be all but against me. Another weekend spent in the dire of yesterday and looking back wondering when it will all change but never having the strength to give up HOPE, hope that change is around the corner..hope that i can grow and fufil my potential as an intelligent loving capable human being.....in hope i trust.