Roasted Chestnuts

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Roasted Chestnuts

From Guardian Online today:

"Under the title "Increase in scrotal temperature in laptop computer users", researchers today reveal in the journal Human Reproduction that a combination of the heat generated by the computers and the position of the thighs needed to balance the machines leads to higher temperatures around men's genitals.

Yefim Sheynkin, who led the research team from the State University of New York at Stonybrook, said it was possible that years of heavy laptop use "may cause irreversible or partially reversible changes in male reproductive function".

Dr Sheynkin said, however, that except for an anecdotal report of genital burns, the effect of portable computers on scrotal temperature had not been known. "Laptops can reach internal operating temperatures of over 70C. They are frequently positioned close to the scrotum, as well as being capable of producing direct local heat, they require the user to sit with his thighs close together to balance the machine, trapping the scrotum." The researchers worked with 29 volunteers between 21 and 35, measuring their scrotal temperature with and without laptops, during two one-hour sessions on different days, in a room where the temperature was around 22C. "

What I want to know is:

1. How did they get research funding for a project called "Increase in scrotal temperature in laptop computer users"

2. Who in their right mind would volunteer for the tests.

3. Is the lab assistant female, and if so, does she warm her hands first?

[%sig%]

Jeff Prince
Anonymous's picture
"2. Who in their right mind would volunteer for the tests." Students - men who prize a fee of £500 for doing the test more than their own knackers.
Stephen Gardiner
Anonymous's picture
1. It was seed funding. 2. I would volunteer. 3. She wore marigolds, warmed.
radiodenver
Anonymous's picture
I heard the lab assistant was a fellow named...Edward Scissorhands.
Liana
Anonymous's picture
I now have "frequent user of laptop" in my list of desirable criteria for new blokes. Anyone see the "rat brain flies plane" link at the register?
Hot Bol Hox
Anonymous's picture
£500 for two hours? For those rates they can stick mine in a toaster. [%sig%]
Jeff Prince
Anonymous's picture
These volunteers must be nuts.
ely whitley
Anonymous's picture
its a genuine problem! the reason that the balls are in a little sack on the outside of the body is that sperm can't operate it temperatures as high as the internal temp of the human body. a marked increase in infertility in young males during the seventies was put down to tight pants pressing the knackers against the body and thus warming them up to the point of uselessness. remember men... you can't have roast chestnuts AND put a bun in the oven!
Jeff Prince
Anonymous's picture
Let it all hang out, chaps. For the sake of all our futures!!
Emma
Anonymous's picture
So - that flasher I saw in Blackpool the other day, with nothing but a kilt, lifted at frequent intervals towards the sea breeze, is doing wonders for his fertility? God it was hideous - like a butcher's shop window.
neil_the_auditor
Anonymous's picture
A well-displayed butcher's shop window (such as the metzgereis in Germany) is a thing of beauty ... gosh, what am I saying??
John
Anonymous's picture
A few years ago i worked in an IVF clinic for 8 months. Part of the Clinic was dedicated to a Bio technology, sampling and Cytology training. Apart for the usual patients hoping to either conceive are have there spermatozoa or eggs placed in to the cryo storage facility, the 'Dewar' system which was my job to monitor, there was no shorted of 'student volunteers', who for a couple of days received from 500 1500£ depending on the trials being conducted. Most of the testing was related to other larger out side privet companies trying to get there product on the market. This kind of activity requires a constant supply of volunteers.
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