Tony the Cosmo Centrefold
Mon, 2005-03-14 14:23
#1
Tony the Cosmo Centrefold
Alas, not our esteemed chief exec, but our vastly less respected PM, who has made a last ditch attempt to appeal to the younger female electorate and has chosen Cosmo "the magazine for real women" as his vehicle of choice (along with Howard and Kennedy).
Now, I am not really that interested in fifty ways to a better orgasm, or where Kate Moss buys her knickers, so I guess it stands to reason that I'm similarly disinterested in whether the PM prefers Britney to Christina Aguilera (or is it the other way round).
Similarly I am not interested in reading about the aforementioned twaddle or in buying a magazine that claims to champion womens issues but employs women in third world sweatshops to create the bits of tat that it peddles monthly on its covers, therefore the Britney / Aguilera piece of information from Mr. Blair is as far as I've got (and that was from yesterday's Observer). But if what Cosmo regards as real election issues is representative of the views 19-34 year old British women then I'm a tin of pears.
So come on all, what do we care about? If Mr. Blair popped into the forum for a pre-election powwow, what would you want to tell him about?
[%sig%]
fergal
Shame - I thought it was 'our' Tony.
Well, you know Tony Blair turned Cosmo down out of hand so the editor made her readers know 'just how little he cared about them' and he did a usual u-turn and joined the other two.
I would ask him 'Do my navy jeans look better with the silver strappies or the cork wedges?' or 'If I had sex with you on the first date would it make you lose respect for me?'
OR
'Why should I believe the resurgence of the ever-sincerity in motion 'Trust me Tony' when you've blatantly lied to me in the past?'
and 'Who the hell am I supposed to vote for now? And do you think that getting in on the back of this attitude in apathetic and disappointed voters is something to be proud of?'
and 'What do you count as being 'left wing'?'
jude
Damn...I had hoped for a link to a saucy pic of our CEO in nought but a thong!
Emma
I don't think Tony would survive long on these forums!
I would like to ask him if he remembers the moment when he left behind any integrity and authenticity and became a performing monkey.
Rachel
I'd like to know seriously, why he thinks I should listen to him and his band of monkeys now that his job's on the line, when he blatantly refused to listen to me in the middle of his term.
And... if they stopped using such expensive envelopes in the House of Commons and bombarding me with them on a daily basis, wouldn't they be able to afford to do something useful with the millions they could save. Ryman do perfectly acceptable lickystick ones for £2.99 per 100.
I have a more substantial list but I have to try and find an NHS dentist and it's proving more difficult than finding a decent politician in whitehall (although I'm sure not impossible).
Rachel
Ferg, that made me laugh so much my waters broke... (as they do on an hourly basis) Mr. Blair, if you can't do the decent thing and offer any kind of maternity service on the NHS then please at least dish out free incontinence pads for giggly pregnant women.
fergal
glad to be of service (it was a *nice* experience I hope Rach).
I've thought of another question:
'Tony, I know you've admitted to making *mistakes*, but could you quantify the difference between making *mistakes* and *lying* to the people of the nation you are always saying you love so much?'
Rachel
OK I have two:
Mr. Blair: do you really think anyone believes that the war on terror is anything more than a battle of inflated egos?
And... do you think that two antenatal appointments, no antenatal classes and no choice of delivery method in one of London's biggest maternity teaching hospitals is decent NHS care?
And following on from that.. if I have to have a c-section because your doctors think that there is a risk that I will sue them if something goes wrong in a normal delivery, even if I object, and then I or my baby catch MRSA, can I sue the NHS anyway?
Liana
"Tony, what really happened to Dr. David Kelly?"
"Tony, how come I have to pay £12,000 for my degree and yours was free?"
Rachel
Tagged on the end of that then... "Tony, is there any correlation between your inexplicable toadying to Mr. Bush and the fact that you are able to buy a £3.5 million house in central London?"
ssssss
anyone remember the address, it was printed in The Guardian?
Rachel
Cavendish square somewhere? Something like that. Why?
Lizzie
Didn't Cosmo do that charity naked celebrity calendar - with celebrities such as Gordon Ramsay etc., naked except for strategically placed tools of their trade?
Well, they could get Tony (Cook) to pose naked with a stategically placed ABC tales mug - that could boost mug sales TC!
Emma
But realistically speaking, an abc mug wouldn't hide his bald head, would it?
Lizzie
LOL - maybe not - but it might just cover something else (not that I have any personal knowledge of TC in that way, you understand!!!)
Emma
I understand perfectly, Lizzie... ;-)
Nice to have you around, btw, how's things?
annie
I'd like to know how he sleeps at night.
Emma
Who TC or TB??!
Lizzie
Hi Emma, things have been a bit hectic on the old work front recently! Have been reading some of the work and forums on ABC but not had lots of time to join in! As have been at home with lurgy today, however, I thought I might as slide in the odd comment! Thanks for asking!
BTW - What do you know about this UKA site - it seems to receive a fair bit of comment on here !!!!
AS for TC - perhaps it would just be safer to feature him in Cosmo in that rather odd "ice-man" suit with fluffy hood that he wore in the ice bar in Iceland, or wherever it was, last year - did you read that thread? I'm sure you did! Speaking of Mug promotions, I have indicated to TC, on his "Mugs" thread that he should pop over onto this ones for out top tip on Mug Promotion!
Tony Cook
Look you lot - I can assure you that an ABC mug would not cover my...
head.
It would do fine elsewhere but what would I have to hide my belly?
On a diet from yesterday - but not doing very well. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Ho Hum and pip pip
tc
Lizzie
Well ho w about a custom made, Limited Edtion ABC Tales Mug, the size of a large ice bucket, to cover your.........
Head/Belly,etc.
...or a Limited editon mug, the size of a thimble, to cover your
Thumb.
Radiodenver
You could sell them in pairs.
A-Cups
B-Cups
C-Cups
May want to include a little string or something to hold them on though.
[%sig%]
Lizzie
LOL - hold them on to what??!!! Clearly you haven't met our esteemed CEO TC! (Only joking , Tony!)
Radio, I should point out I used to work with Tony way back (well, not THAT long ago and I'm MUCH younger!)