Songs that will never be Covered

Even more-so now. Denver's quite the city by the sea? The Paris of the Rockies. We're a very cultural place compared to 1987.

It was a lovely town, except for the 12 tornadoes that touched down the first time I visited the place. Autumn was gorgeous. Left in November before the first blizzard hit.

No doubt the victims were volunteers for the drowning bit.

"Treat Your Mother Right" by B.A. Barracas

Going back to Hox's original, I'd love to hear Eminem cover Spurs are on their way to Wembley. Ossie's off to Wembley, his knees have gone all trembly, the mother F**&ing idiot, I got his bitch in the trunk of my car, Steve Archibald is the man, that's what Dre tells me. Oh, if I had some spare time, I'd rewrite the lyrics of Stan, accordingly. Stan, you gotta understand, I do want you as a Tottenham fan... he drove his car off a bridge and he had Liam Brady in his trunk.

I always thought a good Spurs song would be Sugar (ba ba ba ba ba baaa) ahh, funny money

Presley's wooden heart may havejust been tolerable if he didn't attempt to sing German; Sei mir gut Sei mir gut Sei mir wie du wirklich sollst with a yank accent sound appalling

Foxy - how dare you put the immortal FZ's Willie the Pimp in with that lot - and it has been covered - many times over. It is one of the greatest songs of all time - without a doubt - and none of the covers have up to the original with those magical Beefheart tonsils and that crashing FZ guitar break. Forty dollar bill gonna set you straight.... Just meet me in the lobby of the Lido Hotel...

Is Wooden Heart the Christmassy song? I rather like hearing that German sang with an American accent. Sorry Missi. Didn't he sing a song about a lobster in one of the musicals? That would surely be worse. Or was it about a bull. *evidently not a little white bull, because any such song would be a masterpiece* Going back to Stan-and-Chas-and-Dave :- TrophyRoom is bare, I'm wondrin' why, I bought a season ticket at all, another ropey quarter-final, but Spurs have won f**k all, another midfielder, then it'll all be great, but then Leeds remind me, that it's not so bad, not so bad at all.

Denver, he was one of the first DJ's to play Presley records and met him several times as a result.

My Boy Lollipop was my Millie.

"Blue" by Joni Mitchell would be a very difficult song to cover adequately, because of the breadth of Joni's vocal range and the emotional pain coursing through the song. But no doubt someone's done it. LOVED Rolf Harris doing "Stairway To Heaven", looking rather like Michael Palin in some absolute shit-hole with the "What-am-I-doing-here" expression on his face. Well, once at least ...

Little Arrows by Leapy Lee.

Sarah McLachlan did a rather nice cover of Blue, but I havent heard the original so can't compare the two.

'Slim Shady' was covered by Dave Spikey's character in Phoenix Nights at their Stars In Your Eyes Night. And damn fine it was too.

Little Arrows!!! Arrrgh! Just reading the title has lodged the song firmly in my head... it keeps repeating over and over and over ...here they come falling out of the blue, little arrows for me and for you... Make it stop ...little arrows in your clothing, little arrows in your hair... Help! [%sig%]

:o)

hi all

Hiya, Roxie.

Andrew, apart from the first four movies, no self-respecting Presley fan would be caught alive watching his awful acting career. Christ, he even despised them HIMSELF, he just didn't have the guts to tell Parker to fuck off and find a decent role for him to play. I don't own any of the soundtracks or singles from the 'movies!' and have no wish to. They are garbage.

megan !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dan, might your googling turn up the most infectious song of all time? The lyrics go :- *be warned, this has eaten my brain for the last twenty years* My name is Alan Johnson / I work in Wisconsin / I work in the laundromill there / the people I meet / as I walk down the street / say / Hey, what's your name / And I say / My name is Alan Johnson (repeat to fade) I heard this ONCE on the Chart Show, on the indie chart in about 1983? And it still pops up once a week. God, that really was twenty years ago. I feel sick and wrong. How about Ice-T's Bodycount, the song which on the lyric sheet inlay went "Bodycount mother-F***ing Bodycount - repeat to fade" - it's hard to imagine another group managing to cover that. Godspeed you Black Emperor put me off new music for about eight weeks (which is astounding for someone who buys an album by someone he's never heard of at least once a month). It made me unnerved.

No need to get excited, Megan :)

Tony, I included Willie the Pimp because I couldn't imagine anyone else doing it justice, and that was also the reason why I included Oh Superman as well. Frank Zappa was a genius. Now, let's upset all the Bowie fans and remind everyone of the crime against humanity he committed when he released The Laughing Gnome... David Bowie in full on Anthony Newly mode... Yeuch! And speaking of Mr Newly; anyone remember Pop Goes the Weasel? Another low point in the history of popular music. [%sig%]

just megan

pfft!

Bowie's biggest crime was not spending some of his ill-gotten gains on getting his 'rat' teeth fixed.

Dan, you're a star - I was sure it was Alan Johnson, but the rest of the words are spot on. Great, great song. I really ought to consider replacing the Barron Knights Smurf song with that in my Define5 list.

Oh, I think David Bowie is very...toothsome.

Have my share.

Una Paloma Blanca - Jonathan King (or ANYTHING by him, I imagine) You Wanna Be In My Gang - Gary Glitter (same as above, though I guess King IS in his gang)

"Fog on the Tyne" by Gazza (although it was itself a cover I think) "I'm too sexy" by Right said Fred That Mr Bloby song

grandad - clive somebody and a choir of kids (probably now all in their 40's)

Mr Blobby - Mr Blobby Shut up Your Face - Joe Dolce There's No One quite like Grandma - Some bloody awful school choir Match stalk Men and Match stalk Cats and Dogs - Brian and Micheal Mouldy Old Dough - Lieutenant Pigeon Grandad we Love you - The guy from Dad's Army Oh Superman - Lori Anderson (I think) Willie the Pimp - Frank Zappa

... and i have a really HORRIBLE memory which i've tried to bury ... of listening to the top 20 on the radiogram and there being the most appalling spoken song ... a pack of cards? vile... it makes me shudder ... if someone were to cover that ... brrrrr ....

matchstalk men .... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh ....

what about ernie.... the fastest milkman in the west? ... who would cover that? this thread is making me feel quite ill ...

You're a Pink Toothbrush, I'm a Blue Toothbrush - Max Bygraves Dick a Dum Dum - Des O Conner Save your Love - Rene and Renata

oooh that Grandad song by Clive Dunn was cheesier than stilton I've been sitting here all day thinking Same old thing ten years away thinking Now my days are gone, memories linger on Thoughts of when I was boy ENTER KIDS CHOIR Grandad, grandad you're lovely That's what we all think of you Grandad, grandad you're lovely That's what we all think of you Grandad grandad DIEEEE

I wish I hadn't started this now........ Jake the Peg: Rolf Harris [%sig%]

Russ Abotts Atmosphere oooh I actually liked Benny Hill's Ernie, the fastest Milkman in the west! I liked BEnny Hill...and the 2 Ronnies *looks ashamed* Now Ernie loved a widow, A lady known as Sue: She lived all alone in Lily Lane At number 22; They said she was too good for him, She was haughty, proud and chic, But Ernie got his cocoa there Three times every week. They called him Ernie (Ernie!), And he drove the fastest milkcart in the west.

Benny Hill was a master of sexual innuendo (cocoa three times a week). There was one song called garden of love about aall the flowers that grew after he had fertilised the garden

I´ll be your long haired lover from Liverpool : Jimmy Osmond Remember it and Suffer mwahahahahahaha [%sig%]

The Festive Flop Forty (December 1992) The Neighbours Theme Song (Max Bygraves) There's No One Quite Like Grandma (St Winifred's School Choir) Kinky Boots (Patrick MacNee and Honor Blackman) Who Hid The Halibut On The Poop Deck? (Yogi Yorgesson) Long-Haired Lover From Liverpool (Little Jimmy Osmond) Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini (Bombalurina) To Be Or Not To Be (The Hitler Rap) (Mel Brooks) The Qwaka Song (The Waders) Here Comes Another One (Monty Python) Geordie Boys (Gazza) Right Said Fred (Bernard Cribbins) The Sideboard Song (Live) (Got My Beer In The Sideboard Here) (Chas and Dave) I Live In A Split Level Head (Napoleon XIV) It Takes Two Baby (Liz Kershaw, Bruno Brookes, Jive Bunny and Londonbeat) John Kettley Is A Weatherman (A Tribe of Toffs) Right Said Fred (Bernard Cribbins) Rocking Goose (Johnny and the Hurricanes) Hole In My Shoe (neil) I Like Chinese (Monty Python) Beethoven's Ninth (Rainbow) Goodness Gracious Me (Peter Sellers and Sophia Loren) Fudd On The Hill (Little Roger and the Goosebumps) Seven Tears (The Goombay Dance Band) I'd Rather Jack (The Reynolds Girls) Winchester Cathedral (The New Vaudeville Band) The Joseph Mega-Remix (Jason Donovan and Friends: The Original London Cast of "Joseph" featuring Linzi Hately, David Easter and Johnny Amobi) Two Little Boys (Rolf Harris) Making Your Mind Up (Bucks Fizz) Donald Where's Your Troosers? (Andy Stewart) Ay Ay Ay Ay Moosey (Modern Romance) Spuggly (Burnessence) Agadoo (Black Lace) Snooker Loopy (The Matchroom Mob with Chas and Dave) Ernie (The Fastest Milkman In The West) (Benny Hill) Hits On Opera (The London Symphony Orchestra with Kimera) Downtown (Mrs Miller) The Grease Megamix (John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John) I'll Be Back (The Dancefloor Devastation Kick-Up) (Arnee and the Terminaters) Little Boxes (Pete Seeger) Fog On The Tyne (Gazza and Lindisfarne)

Billy, Don't be a Hero - Paper Lace Tears for Souvenirs - Ken Dodd Agadoo - I can't rember the culprits Convoy GB - Dave Lee Travis and another cretinous Radio 1 DJ Boom Bang a Bang - Lulu (I think) The Floral Dance - Terry Wogan

THIS IS JUST WRONG My Dead Dog Rover - Hank/ Dave Dave: See you later, Hank... Well, there's that Rover now. (Rover barks.) Hey, get out of here! You can't come on here while I'm mowing the lawn! Get out of here! (Dog barks again.) Rover, get out of here! (Dog continues to bark and is suddenly replaced by shrieking whistles.) I'm looking over my dead dog Rover Who I hit with a power mower: One leg is missing, the other is gone, A third leg is scattered all over the lawn. No need explaining, the one leg remaining Is spinning on the carport floor, I'm looking over my dead dog Rover Who I overlooked before. (Replay of dog being mown down.)

ah, Nick Drake is hard to touch due to his tunings. I'm still waiting for a punk version of 'Making Your Mind Up' by that band with Cheryl in it.

I Live In A Split Level Head (Napoleon XIV) Didn't he do "They're Coming To Take Me Away" too?

Has anyone done a cover of the Beatles' "Yellow Submarine"? It seems like a song that would be impossible to cover appropriately; some, I suppose, would consider it sacreligious...

they're coming to take me away ha ha he he ...to the funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time and I'd be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats...