Timothy and John Q. Averageman oh and a very long rant please

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Thu, 2005-04-07 12:08

As a 17 year old, unsurprisingly, I often fall foul of severe fits of depression. No biggie, but the reason for this is mostly my loathing of mankind in general and the overwhelmingness that comes with performing even the simplest of co-operations with regular people...
What's this post about? Oh yeah
Uh, sorry, I kind of got off topic before I started...Ah...Um...Oh, no, it was related. Sort of.
I came up with a few names for the stereotypes that one invariably comes across when dealing with people, or just when you see a large group of people. In my biology class, for example, there are many dull, lifeless people whom I assume never have the trouble of dealing with a real thought in their heads; on the rare occasion I talk to them, to borrow a pen since, for the ninth time this week, I've lost mine, they usually respond with one or other of the following:
a) Classic drug addiction accusal (for some reason, I decided to start a rumour that I was a heroin addict, and it seems to have caught on, so it's my own fault I guess...I do look pretty gaunt) e.g. "Here you go you fuckin' druggie/stoner"

b) A quote from Little Britain. It used to be the Simpsons, but now only the Timothy Q. Normalmans quote the Simpsons (more on that later). More amusing and charming if the quote bears no relevance to the 'conversation' e.g. "Yah ah know" ... you know what? I asked for a ruler.

c)Outright refusal. And I can't really blame them here, I would keep the pen.

d)Unintelligable muttering, followed by the proffering of the stationary. My favourite, as usually no response is illicited on my part.

Anyway. Back to the point (in case you haven't guessed, this has turned into a plain out rant). These people tend to fall into two camps: Timothy Q. Averageman and Johnathon Q. Averageman (or Normalman, whichever seems most apt). Now they are fairly easily discernable from sight, but the defining point re the differences between the two characters is this - John would have, on 5 occasions, participated in the reefer circle, whilst Timothy would have never had the chance to do any illegal drugs, but has been drunk 6 times. All other social implications stem from these facts.

I was low, considering our friends here. I felt pity, the worst emotion and one I usually avoid like a shiv in the shin. But soon, after a discussion with my good friend David Davies about his 'Twat Execution' plan for world domination, the matter of energy production etc. came up, and I realised that the Capitalist system really does work. By keeping these people the way they are at birth, they're breeding a workforce, nay, an army of Averagemans, like in that 70s film with all the clones. This gave me some respite at least, knowing that the world could not function without these droids.

But on my recent trip to Spain, an Easter trip to a crummy hotel in some touristic resort, I encountered some even more depressing factors of the nation; the Normalmans were there, only this time they were from all over. German Normalmans, old Normalmans, infant Normalmans; I fell into a quasi-catatonia for 3 days just from the thoughts of these peoples' lives.

But! Another factor in the depression. Who am I to act so high and mighty over these people? Are they not happy, in their own way? The answer is no. They may think they are, but they work for a whole year, and their rest is here? How can they be!?!?! I can't even think in the same way as them, so how am I going to make it in society? Am I going to have to become a hermit? Terrance X. Hermitman? I tried getting a job, an 8-4 shift on a Sunday at my local Co-Op, but it was like thrusting myself into Normal soup. My cow-workers, the people I served, well, that's it, but that was everyone. And I realised that I'm literally incapable of working alongside regular folk, let alone getting up at 7 EVERY MORNING, which is bad enough when I'm going to school but at least I get a little stimulation...

I fear the dole. I can't conceivably afford living on whatever meek wage I get acting or writing or whatever it is I wind up doing, and I know I can't get a 9-5 to support myself. I thought about going on the game, but I saw a program on that the other night and unless you're gay (oddly I'm not) there really isn't enough money in it to keep you going alone. Maybe I should marry into money. But that's virtually the same, and besides I'm also incapable of acting normal enough to attract passing rich widows etc. I've modeled myself for my perfect mate: as long as I find myself attractive, then the person who is perfect for me will also find me attractive! Only I get distracted a lot by mirrors. Uhn. Losing track of point.

Society is terrifying. Yes. And there are too many John Q. Averagemans, Rob H. Beefmans, Timothy Q. Normalmansa and Mrs. Etceteras to sift through before you find the people who are real gold. And even when you think you might've find one they turn out to be a Ms. Mirrorson when you see them around other people...old wounds...

I've managed to find one, the aforementioned Mr. Davies, and a few others through, mostly, channels like my Theatre Studies class, but life gets boring sometimes living with recluses. But I couldn't have it any other way.

I just wish sometimes there was better pay. Or a few more perks.

Ah...I seem to have gone on a bit...And I realise I sound like a sickeningly pretentious elitist or something, but I had to have my rant.

And I can't help but notice, naming no names, that there are a few maybe John J. Averagemans on this here forum. Life is hard, but they're the price to pay for your Sainsbury's scones.
I know these are not original thoughts, everyone's had them at one time or another and many people have said them better than I have, but to share them with people like you, for the most part, would really help me, I think. Sorry for going on a bit.

Chris.

PS if you have any little nicknames for the 'people' among us, please share!

Fri, 2005-04-08 14:02

maxwell eddison

Faithless...asking a person who is bipolar to cheer up and stop taking themselves so seriously is like approaching a wheelchair bound person in the street and telling them to stop being lazy and get up and walk. I'm stopping there because I feel a crusade coming on! :< |

Fri, 2005-04-08 14:05

emily yaffle

Actually, that does sometimes help me - not when I'm properly deep but if I'm sliding off, a sharp word from a friend is sometimes better than sympathy and understanding. And I don't think Jazzpirate is bipolar, he's just seventeen. Basically Chris, don't worry about it - the chances are that you'll turn out alright and stop being so concerned about what's going on in the minds of other people. You sound like an alright bloke, if a little self-absorbed, but then most people were at seventeen.

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:13

fergal

You know, the best thing I ever realised - after being a teenager who thought everything and everyone in the world was ruined and terrible - was that I AM one of the Normal people too, and that everyone has fears, dreams, neurosis, hppes, money troubles, relationship troubles. Everything. I find that a comfort, and I also find it makes it easier to connect with others. Imagining that others don't have the capacity to think and be challenged as you do is entertaining for a while - but mostly, it isn't true. In my opinion.

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:19

Tony Cook

Feel free to rant on here - it was good stuff, well expressed! You really should read Jason Pegler's book (see ABCtales front page) as he felt much as you do at your age - and went very badly down hill. I'm not suggesting that you will necessarily do the same thing but to be forewarned is to be armed - so give it a whirl!

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:28

JazzPirate

I do keep telling myself that this is just a phase, but a large part of me doesn't want it to be over; I don't even want to be able to communicate with people, I'd like to be as incoherent as possible. Which I think is a tad hypocritical, but that's one of the benifits of being a hypocrite. My main problem is that, like most teenagers, I don't know what I want. All I know is that I don't want to 'end up' anything. I'd like to be changing, learning, my whole life. The post wasn't intended to be about myself, but I see the line share of it is...whoops. BUT since we are discussing me- One of my favourite books, Nausea, details how you can go near-crazy just thinking about existance and simply spending too much time alone, and I can see that happening to me. So I guess it's a fine line between not conforming and just being a nut. But at this stage, as things very well may change, I'd rather be a hermit than somebody that drives to work and back, two separate lives...I can only cope with one.

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:32

fergal

It's okay to not know what you want you know... sometimes those people who seem to be fine with sticking at one thing for a long time, actually aren't. I don't know if that will make you feel any better at all - but I'm 28 and I have done so many different things - have been changing and hopefully learning - for years. People conform in different ways. When I was at school there were loads of things I didn't even realise were options for when I left... things seemed so limited. Since leaving school I realised there are loads of people living in loads of different ways, making the most of what they can when they can. As for not being able to communicate with people - you are articulate in type, so that's a start. (sometimes spending too much time alone can drive you nuts... it does help to be around others sometimes if you can).

Sun, 2005-04-10 18:57

JazzPirate

Sounds good. Your cheque's in the post.

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:53

JazzPirate

Thank you, fergal, for the compliment, but this is how I talk in real life, except quicker and with a constant slur for some reason, like a drunken Peter Cook, but slightly less obscene. I think the reason for my worries is mostly all the things my generation gets told at school, and by the parents, that we all assume are true and you have to follow. Like when the Connexions people come in and try and pin down every student with exactly what they want to do, their 'learning style' and so on. I'd never even really considered what if these people aren't right all the time until recently. That was some help to me, mentally, but it does seem difficult doing it your way, because living by your own rules nobody gives you any help; why should they? But it is useful to have people such as yourself wielding advice, you've obviously been there, and I can imagine most people here were teenagers once, but the world is changing in such odd and unnerving ways that everyone seems to have a completely different view on almost everything. Which is good in some ways, but confusing in most... AOL...grumblegrumble....

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:57

#10

maxwell eddison

Don't worry about the money. I've been living on peanuts for what seems like an eon, and it's actually very rewarding. It enables you to appreciate what REALLY matters in your life.

Thu, 2005-04-07 12:59

#11

fergal

<> You'd be surprised at how helpful some people can be if you're willing to ask. You seem fairly smart to me... and I doubt they could pin you down even if they wanted to. At school I did one of those careers assessor things and it came out that I should be a prison warden or a policewoman. My eyesight is rubbish, so the police is out, and I'm a bit of a giggler, so I don't see how working in a prison would be my forte (though I would be willing to give it go perhaps....). They just do things to give you ideas. I had one friend who was told she was going to be a vetinary nurse. That one proclamation has pushed her onwards and onwards and she is now a successful journalist and is about to have her first novel published. I'll stop going on now... Keep posting on here though. I enjoyed your rant.

Thu, 2005-04-07 13:12

#12

maxwell eddison

Mental illness is a very lonely journey. I think the only true bit of wisdom my shrink has come up with so far is that describing a severe depression or related mental illness is like trying to describe grief to someone who has never experienced it. There's a terrible stigma in society. It's still very much acceptable to rip the piss out of those suffering from mental illness as opposed to say, physically challenged individuals. But it's very much the same. Time will right the wrongs.

Sun, 2005-04-10 20:14

#13

megan

whats this about ?

Fri, 2005-04-08 19:50

#14

JazzPirate

I'd feed you monkeys any day Jasper =^D

Fri, 2005-04-08 20:35

#15

faithless

everyone's a therapist these days. sheesh. jazzpirate you sound healthily messed-up and what you need is years of self-indulgence garnered from every random opportunity that presents itself. that will be nine million quid please.

Thu, 2005-04-07 21:45

#16

JazzPirate

People often say that there's no such thing as a normal person, and to some extent they're right. But if we were all staunch individualists then nothing would work would it? If you've never met a normal person, Jasper, I assume you've never had a job in an office or a similar environment, or visited a factory or any workplace with a large workforce, or bought anything from a shop, or left the house, which although believable is hardly likely. Everyone is unique, but as somebody said once, some people are more unique than others. And in different ways. And there's lots of crazies trying to pass themselves off as 'normal' people, and that I hate more than anything...why would anyone gifted by being interesting want to be average? But I think one main reason I want to be 'different' is down to my uninteresting childhood...but I'll leave that to my future shrinks. Chris

Thu, 2005-04-07 22:45

#17

maxwell eddison

When you begin to consider yourself a normal person in a crazy world - THAT's when you should start to worry!

Fri, 2005-04-08 02:20

#18

faithless

some advice chris. stay a student as long as you can, take up a course with a criminally low amount of contact time and have a year off to deal with whatever crisis you can invent. this will stretch out to four years. then take up a masters degree in a city with incredibly low rents, after this embark on a phd which involves a lot of experiencial research, and hopefully you might hit 30 never having had to work on a regular basis. this course of action will also massively reinforce the sense of superiority and vague intolerance you have already acquired. or you might just take up alcohol and bypass all this guff through the simple expedient of chemical shutdown. or you might cheer up and stop taking yourself so seriously, giving us all a break from your extensive and rococo neuroses. love m xxx

Fri, 2005-04-08 12:21

#19

JazzPirate

Haha, thank you m. I only take myself seriously half of the time, the other half I'm uhhhh I'll say fine. I used to think it was cute to tell people I was manic depressive until I met someone who actually was and realised that it's a pretty stupid/intolerant thing to do. My big problem is and always has been that I think too much about the wrong things; in fact the only time I didn't have any worries was when I was 14 and I drank myself stupid every day, so that does work but I really couldn't keep it up as I now vomit instinctively at the taste of vodka. I'll take the cue to stop whinging now, but thanks to yous all for your help. Chris

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