Hawaii Or Not?

Karma? Is that freshly ground Karma or Instant Karma?

Missi, I have two old friends living in Honolulu; I'd be happy to put you in touch with them whilst you're out there. One is a graphic designer and the other one designs intelligence software for the military (or something like that; he'd have to kill me if he told me the truth) and I'm sure they'd be happy to show you around and get you orientATED. Honolulu is butt-ugly as far as cities go, but you can't beat Hawaii as a place to work. Go for it!

Yeah well, it seems like the Hawaii job is fading away. I haven't heard from the guy for several days now. I didn't really expect it to materialise, I was only pursuing it out of curiosity.

he might have more pressing issues like his brothers health on his mind, keep it on the back burner..ya never know,and if he does get back to you eventually, you will have had time to work out all the pro's and cons, everything happens for a reason (d'oh, have i just let slip i'm a bit of a fatalist?) no? oh good..

Just done a quick check and it seems to be you that has done most of the bitching Liana. Perhaps your concern should be for your own karma - I'm sure the question of your sanity has never been in doubt :o)

Say Ohhhhm Mykle. You know it makes sense.

how much to chuck him into a live volcano, AG.......it'll save a virgin

Hahahaha. Om mani padme... :o)

I'd go. + take Paul Theroux's Hotel Honolulu with you. It's a great book - eighty rooms, eighty stories

I like Karma Apples...

bidets are great things, best thing the french ever did. Once you get into using them you dont wantg to go back to bog roll. THink of it this way... if you tripped in the garden and your hand landed in some dog pooh, would you wipe it with a paper towel and go about your business? No, you'd wash it several times over. Well skin's skin and pooh's pooh. also, you dry off with a towel which is lovely AND you don't have to remember to buy bog roll.

Oh!! You mean they're not for washing your feet in?

that's another thing, they can be usefull in other ways. if you've got severe food poisoning, you know the kind that proves Newtons laws because every downwards action creates an equal upwards one and you turn into the human hand grip on a pooh and puke double ended light sabre. you can sit on't bog and lean over the bidet. also good as: foot/hair/hamster washer drinking fountain bird bath indoor water feature

PLEASE GEORGE!!! you simply HAVE to stop sending those begging e-mails! YES, I'm a talented builder and YES my eye for design was once insured for ten million by vision express, and YES I can make a work horse look like a pampered cat with my superhuman work ethic but you're just gonna have to do this one alone my friend, I've (probably) got publishers on their way over here to beat my door down and start a bidding war otherwise I'd be right there mate. sounds like a dream job, have a good time and always know the quickest route to the water mains.

I call you Slimey because it is very descriptive of your true personality ( I alos have a predilection for anagrams), and I don't 'attack' your character, I just tell it like it is, you horrid little man. (It's 'marshmAllows', by the way) Ian, the guy in Honolulu hasn't got back to me yet, maybe because I heard on the grapevine that his brother is seriously ill with a cancerous tumour. I've spent all day plastering a bloody ceiling, and the way I feel at the moment I don't care if I never see another house, either in Essex or Hawaii.

ely, you got sunstroke from sitting near a pond all day waiting for some unsuspecting perch to gobble ya sugar puff?........'talented builder?'........'eye for design?'.........wheres the after sun?

well I was talented enough to rewire your house walt if I remember and fit your bathroom not to mention converting Bene's loft (complete with hand built staircase rewiring and a skylight), single handedly in a week. But hey, I guess you've never known a life without a genius for a brother so it's hard for you to be objective. George: I remember the first ceiling I plastered. It was artexed to death and I made some stilts out of pieces of 2x4 thinking I'd be clever and save time. they weighed about twenty pounds each and by the end of the day I was a wreck. My thighs and shins were screaming but they were out done by the pain in my shoulder. I hate plastering ceilings but it does get easier with practice as you know. after the first couple of days spent trying to swill multifinish from the back of your eyeball you tend to focus better. (best wishes to your mate's brother btw)

Ok, I now have so many emails asking if the sender can be my 'gopher' on the job that I MUST ask you all to form an orderly queue and present your credentials in the accepted manner. Guys, here's my empty beer mug, ladies, the casting couch is in the corner.

Sounds fantastic. Aren't you abit of an old sod to be working your butt off in that heat? Something to think about. Your health should always come first gramps! :) Work Permit...hmmm...a friend of mine clinched a job working in miami and had it all fucked up because the company employing him couldn't come up with a good enough reason why a US citizen couldn't do the job. good luck!! I hope whatever you plan to do you will put your priorities right. :)

Old? You got it all wrong, some of the fittest guys I know are my age or older, and anyway I've been assured that all the work is indoors and the place is air-conditioned. The work permit bit might be a problem but at the moment nothing is decided.

If they get you on a surfboard George, we want pictures.

I can imagine you are fitter than a great deal of todays youth missi but you need to maintain your health sensibly at your age, not test it! Get rid of that gut for a start, cut your hair and take anger management :) It's a bloody great opportunity if you can get it. I doubt you'd even need a work permit if you were to arrange a holiday there and electronically transfer your cash in the right direction? I dunno, I'm guessing.

Hahahahahaha :o)

What makes you think I have a big gut? I'm a bit overweight I admit but hardly a lard-arse. As for the hair, it stays until the grim reaper burns it in hell. Lastly i don't need anger management, I manage it very well as it is. When I lose it, it's because I WANT to lose it. The first things immigration asks you when you arrive at any entry point in the USA is, 'What is the purpose of your visit?', and 'How long are you staying?' I can hardly say ' Oh, I'm just gonna ride the Banzi pipeline for 2mths', now can I? Especially with a full plumbing kit in my suitcase and a plastering trowel tucked in my back pocket! Not to mention the tiling tools and a van load of carpentry tools. The only bit that WOULDN'T be a problem is the money, which I could have funnelled through friends in the USA. The thing is, if I were to be caught working without a permit I'd be permanently excluded from the USA, and I spend a lot of time there these days, (three visits in the last 8mths).

lol. That's what I always say to ppl who tell me to get my hair cut. "What do you mean? Everyone gets long hair eventually." Unless you're cremated that is. Mine is nearly down to my waist right now and it's been long since, gawd, since I was 11. But I'm not fat so that's where the comparisons end. Ship your tools out before you leave. I'm sure your temporary visa gets you through 4 months doesnt it? Not sure. We stayed on at I-drive for a further month and we went in october and I'm sure it said we had til january until we were illegal. fact is, if you're gonna apply for a work permit in the states, you're gonna be waiting for a long long time! I'd do it...sounds fantastic. And to be honest, if you did croak it out there, I wouldn't lose any sleep :)

I don't need a visa, but they still expect you leave after 6 mths. The point is, lying and getting caught is not a good idea. I also doubt you'd be the sole person to hear of my demise with indifference.

point taken, but you know when i asked you why the toilet flushes every time i switch a light on and you said " its all in the regs" what exactly did you mean? ah, am very grateful........really..........honest!

That's probably so you don't have to view the crap you've so absent-mindedly left lying around.

left lying around? i'd like to think the old arse-rocket hit its target every time! (of course i wouldn't know..its always dark, but i'm sure there'd be some sort of squelching...wouldn't there?)

Dunno, depends on whether you had a curry the night before or maybe a bit constipated, in which case you're just as likely to trip over a log and bang your head on the foot bath!

same for everyone I should expect. realising that "I wouldn't lose any sleep" is a bad choice of words for a raving insomniac. Choosing to rip the piss outta myself these days seeing as you're not playing :)

she HAS a foot bath! how did you know? actually it's a foot by a foot and a half but it's still tiny by any standards. ... err yeah, Walt, it's building regs. You know, like those fans that come on whe you turn the light on whether you want them to or not, this is the flush equivalent. Stops any "wee beige jobbie" moments. .. and you know how fussy I am about flushing things away!

I'd say so g... the money alone is worth putting up with the grass skirt.

Am I a size 12 or 16?

I was in Honolulu in early March for a week. The heat isn't hot. It doesn't get that hot there, it doesn't get that cold there, as a matter of fact, the average temperature is almost always between 70-85 degrees F. It never gets freezing cold ever. You'll see about 50 rainbows a day. It will rain and be sunny almost every day (don't know about year around though on the rain thing). Honolulu is a very populated area, the traffic is a nightmare, but the rest of the island of Oahu is a beautiful place. I have a ton of pics, I'll e-mail you some if you like. The Hawaiian Islands are very modernized, and very very beautiful. The cost of living is high, very expensive, but for 10,000 a month (pounds or dollars), you'll have no problem. I would say; if you didn't take it you'd be a fool! I would give up my left nut to move there.

It's not a case of not playing, it's more a case of you've been better behaved recently so I haven't felt the need to remonstrate with you. Jasper I now ignore completely because that's what the sack of crap deserves, and I still feel the need to tell the twerp from Shuddersfield exactly what I, and many others here, think of him.

Oh, there are as many Japanese there as their are Americans....btw...It's a tourist Meca for the Japanese...

50 rainbows a day and $10,000 a month. How could you refuse?

Reminds me of the joke where a few peole are on holiday and after a few pints one mentions that he does a bit of DIY. Someone else jokes that he has a door that needs re-hanging in Hawaii - never suspecting that he's going to get hasstled continously for the next 3 years about when would be a convenient time to start :o)

Thaks denver, I'd like some pics. >> It's a large home (3,000 or 4,000 square feet) and overlooks a Bay on the east side of the island. << That's a bit of the email I got about it, is that near Honolulu?

Reminds me of the joke where a few people are on holiday and after a few pints one mentions that he does a bit of DIY. Someone else jokes that he has a door that needs re-hanging in his holiday home in Hawaii - never suspecting that he's going to get pestered continously for the next 3 years about when would be a convenient time to start :o)

Honolulu is probably about the size (population) of Denver, maybe a little less. A little more conjested and less roadways, it's on the southern shore overlooked by Diamond Head on the southeast shore. There is a large US Naval Base there, Pearl Harbor...you know from WWII and the Movies. The east shore is fantastic, I flew over it in a Helicopter and took about 50 photos. The North shore has some of the wildest surf on the planet. That's where the Banzi pipeline is, the most famous surfers paradise anywhere. 20 ft waves break 50 yards from shore. Wanna die, go surfing the Banzi Pipeline! Very low population on the North shore, you can drive there from Honolulu in 45 minutes, the east shore in about 30 minutes. We flew completely around the Island in about 1.5 hours, making small hovering stops to view scenery. Waikiki Beach is a very famous beach just east of Honolulu, that's where I stayed. And, you have the other Islands, which are just a boat ride or plane hop away, and are no where near as conjested and about 2-3 times larger.

Jesus, I thought the Banzi pipeline was one of those that Saddam blew up in Kuwait. Well it sounds great, all I gotta do now is reach an agreement with the people who want the job done.

DIY is what the likes of you do, Slimey, I am a professional.

Fingers crossed :o)

Re: what job? Author: mississippi (---.server.ntli.net) Date: 05-03-05 22:18 I'm sure I've been through this before but I'm not really a 'carpenter' though I have done some and still do when I can't avoid it. The only job I was ever formally trained for was blacksmith, a job I did for several years before joining the merchant navy, in which I was a PO mechanic. Since then I've worked as a farm hand, welder, docker, plumber, sheet metal worker, hod carrier, tiler, carpenter, demolition worker, shop worker and more recently as a kitchen and bathroom fitter. I also spent some time in my youth studying Stanislavsky method acting at Southend Drama Workshop. I am now retired and retarded.

You can uncross them Slimey, if I go it'll only be for a couple of months, and I'll have internet access there anyway, I've already established that. Sorry. Perhaps my next job will be in Scarborough and I can buy you a pint!

Talk about Fish's karma.. I reckon yours is taking a battering this weekend Mykle. Don't you ever ever *ever* stop needling????? Jut TOP it. It's not clever and it's making you look a complete numpty. Get away from the pc... back away, go make tea, do SOMETHING else, ffs...

And now my S wont worked. Please don't top it, STOP it. I doubt you COULD top what youve managed lately.

Well, it's a nice thought George... let's hope you can hold it. Now if you could just learn to spell Smiley correctly :o) Good luck with the job anyway.