Nicholas Cabot and Lola Emms

Yes, it is a bit cheeky but I can well understand your need for feedback, especially for your first ABC entry. Also, a fellow wolf can not resist the call.... OK. It's a very interesting piece of writing with some good ideas and a clever theme. My only niggle would be repeating the word 'long' in the first paragraph and my own puzzling over a few phrases such as 'iron-haired' (Is this colour, rigidity etc?) and the fact that the main character feels from his 'umbilical cord' in one part......it's a rather odd phrase but it might be my particular taste. Otherwise, I think you have a definite style and there is an obvious enjoyment in the writing. It only needs a firm edit and perhaps a replacement of some repeated words and phrases but I do like the central idea very much. Hope to read more of your work and welcome to ABC. I hope others will give you some feedback, because mine is only one opinion...

have just checked out Delillo's Underworld. a very neat piece of writing - sharp, precise and playful. according to the author, there is too much artifice in Delillo, (whom i've never read). when i've got a moment, i'll check out NCALE. i'll be interested to see what canarywolf's own manifesto for prose is.

Thanks Wolfgirl 'Twas written a couple of years back - just after reading 'Underworld', strangely enough. Think in my bemused distaste I didn't notice that I was being influenced to mistake repetition for thematic development. Perhaps hypocrisy is the sum of my two abctales contributions. But hey, if Delillo can do it and 'get away' with it then why not me? I take your points, though. Id like to read one of yours - just tell me which one you cherish most intensely. When I get round to applying a cotton bud to my temporarily blocked imagination gland, I'll put up something a bit more fresh.