disappointment

I've heard the piece he's always bragging about using is a little on the short side of 5"

Flaccid or otherwise? Ooops, sorry.

How much did she get for the snogg??? I would also like to add that I think Mr Peter Stringfellow is a wonderfull and charming character who abides by the strict licencing laws of this country and provides a much needed tourist attraction for the beautiful area of Soho. Also who else would we have to thank for that wonderful gourmet DIY meal 'Stringfellows oven chips'

Are the chips a little on the short side of 5"?

and dead greasy? i didn't know you could get celebrity oven chips. put me down for a bag of miranda richardsons

pert, tasty, and good to dip in ketchup

Geeus-one-a-ya-chips, will-ya-robert? Ooooh...ta!

sorry, fecky. mirandas aren't for sharing you crochet what you want but it won't change my mind

Pssst, Robert, he doesn't even KNIT, let alone crochet...

Well, I'm a lot older (well, a bit!) than Greasy Stringfella, and I wouldn't touch him with a bloody bargepole (even if he'd have me)...yuk!

Snogging old shaggy lama Stringfellow ? A career move, surely....

as a child i used to like to suck on an Oddfellow...

Apropos of nothing whatsoever... I've met Peter Stringfellow, at the club, before it turned into a strip joint. He's got really *fat* hands. Squidgy, like. Rest of him's as normal as can be expected but his hands are dead lardy. Ewww.

i am fairly sure i would not snog peter stringfellow ... but then i am not a ripe young thing so he is unlikely to attempt to snog me ... aaaaah the consolations of age ...

I quite like him. Don't think I'd snog him but he always seems very willing to take the piss/have the piss taken out of himself. I have tremendous respect for that. And he does have some very fetching clothes...

oh my word! I read in a magazine where a reader 'won' a date with Peter Stringfellow and he told her she should get plastic surgery! How's that go again? - pot calling the kettle...

...doesn't that Chris Quinton, ex Brian Tilsey of Coronation Street, work at Stringfellows as some sort of meeter and greeter....he's a lot younger than stringfellow...but i still wouldn't snog him......or want to win a date with him...or with peter

is stringfellow coming to the ember tonight? *polishes lips*

Your friend obviously works for Meals on Wheels then, Chant. It was just a peck on the forehead as she tucked him in with his cocoa. Hmm. Do you polish your lips until you can see your lips in them, O finny one?

Oh, sorry Fish, thought you said 'polishes whips'

I thought she said *brandishes hips* but obviously I am mistaken.

*flourishes quips*

Ah yes, that must have been it!

There's a rhyme here that I don't even dare to think about.

Darren was best man a few months ago to one of our mutual friends. Struggling for a speech with a difference, he scanned in a photo of the grooms head onto a picture of Peter Stringfellow wearing a tight g-string, pole dancing...... It was quite a good photo!!!!

Lets all spare a few thoughts for the pole!

Er...MUST we? Prayers yes, thoughts, no.

A job for the health and safety inspector, surely?

Did you call?

how long is a piece of stringfellow?

No answer for that one, but just don't try pushing on it.