Skeletons in the cupboard

Missus, that is seriously revolting!

Yeah I know, but the bastards had it coming!

I once killed my Technical Drawing teacher at school because he said my design for a ship was crap. I went on to become a ship designer and actually drew up the plans for a ship named the Titanic. They actually built it, too, although I forget what happened to it.

In my *senior* years at secondary, I was the faster female runner in the whole school. Sports days were filled with glory and unlimited dates. Sadly, these days I cannot run to catch the bus. (I used to go out with the fastest guy from the boys school...those two weeks were bliss man)

(I also used to be in a steel band)

I used to own a Robin Reliant.

I knew a fast girl once, but I couldn't find a sharp enough hacksaw to get her out of the steel band.

All you needed was the heavily clothed "d" steel stick to unleash unknown demons :O)

a had my appendix out at 12... I was a boarding school at the time and I faked a stomach ache because I was homesick.....whoops Well...how was I supposed to know it would go that far?

i knocked 'relax' by frankie goes to hollywood out of Boots when i was a young teenager. i'm glad, really... i felt i would have betrayed my musical integrity (Shut yir fecking gobs) if i had actually PAID for it.

Yes folks I was Joe Coral on another thread, I really must get my act together!

I once beat the bishop on his crochet lawn

I once ate the eye of a trout for a fifty pence bet. In hindsight it's a better story to tell than the experience itself. I could feel it looking up at me from inside.....

Err.. Tan63, spare a minute, got something to catch up with you..

But the eyes are the best bit, MYB...

When I was 15 and in my first job, I had to make the tea for everyone else and was obliged to suffer the abuse of all of 'em. Eventually one of the bullies chucked his tea over me and at the next tea-break I secretly pissed in the pot and sat back tealess with a grin on my face! I always laugh when I hear someone use the phrase, ' he ain't got a pot to piss in '.

I've got a Skeleton in the cupboard

I won a He-man competition when I was younger. I had to stand on stage, and shout "I have the power of playschool" while holding a plasic sword up. I won cos I was hte only one to rip my t-shirt off while I shouted. Oh yeah, I won a bottle of champagne in a singing contest. It was originally for the best singer but I was soooo spectacularly bad that they changed the whole competition especially for me... ... and I shaved my legs and dressed up like a girl for a day on holiday, everyone did it but I shouldnt bow to peer pressure. Oh and I was the only one to shave my legs for it, I was told I was the sexiest Lady-Boy on the island :) Beat that peeps

Easty, you clearly have a dark and sordid past! I once bought a peter andre single *shudders* why, god, why do you make me do these things?

i knit, really well. I crochet too. *waits for onslaught*

I was winner of the Bouncing Baby competition at Butlins Skegness in Nineteen-cough-mumble. At seventeen I dragged up to play the female lead in school concert play, and was measured with a 48 inch bust. But at least I don't knit :o))

I murdered my granny and her terrier with an axe, and stuffed them in a cupboard under the stairs.. that was some time ago.. *expects notes from animal lovers*

I used to do synchronised swimming but left when I was thirteen as the rest of the girls doing it were nine (and puppy-fat free unlike myself). It's actually quite hard and you have to wear nose clips which hurt like hell so those forced smiles you see on the telly really are under duress!

No, no, terriers are ok. As long as it wasn't a PROPER dog, like a retriever or a St Bernard or anything... And I have FAR too many skeletons in my cupboard to reveal to you judgemental lot. Rest assured, though, that I don't knit or crochet...

i fear, Andrea, that it is your dubious association with batty bird poet Phyllis White that posterity will judge you most harshly for.

I wouldn't count on it, Chant...

I had to do knitting at an Irish primary school for a year, and I can honestly say it was the most traumatizing experience of my life. The teacher hated me, I couldn't do it at all, and I spent pretty much every lesson staring helplessly at a ball of wool and two knitting needles, whilst everyone else effortlessly produced scarves and gloves with seemingly a mere flick of their wrists. The teacher would yell, and demand to know why I wasn't trying. She even called me a trouble-maker. Well, at least I could make one thing in that stupid lesson. So Liana, if you can knit really well, you have all my respect!

Do vegans knit? Just a thought.. Ralph

Yeah, they do. They just dont eat the jumper/sock/scarf afterwards. :P

perhaps they use acrylic wool.... *feels self getting sadder by the minute*

I've heard that the New Zealand moe is an endangered species as the result of Liana's Stahkonivite practices. Just a rumour, though. I'm not giving it much credence.