Poetry Cafe

*emerges from exhaustion* you guys recover quickly! Harold is a star.. what fantastic nasal hair.. (Harold 1 Stormy 0 in the facial hair stakes).. hope he emerges on ABCTales.. I bet he could tell a few stories.. (prompt for you to suggest suitable usernames) Enjoyed meeting all of you again.. Martin, Missi, LadyWriter, Hoxtoneye, Fish for brains, Wiggins, Ralph.. As for the rest: Wolfie has wolves eyes, Eddie.. nice man but sh*t poems, AJ who passes her crutches around, BobbleHat bobbless, Justyn smooth in Burgundy.. Stormy.. er lovely stormy p*ssed as a fart, Robert and Stephen splendid chaps and lovely Liana who has tattoos in places you would not believe.. I emerged with a few treasures in my pockets.. BobbleHats poem booklet 'nothing else to do'.. print out of 'Whoccyblabber' from Eddie.. Liana's poem booklet with 'artistic' pictures on the cover, Karls self hypnosis tape 'How to make friends' (I shall be reporting).. .. and hardly a dent in my wallet despite not being without a drink throughout.. ..what I call a successful night. When's the next one.

*emerges from exhaustion* you guys recover quickly! Harold is a star.. what fantastic nasal hair.. (Harold 1 Stormy 0 in the facial hair stakes).. hope he emerges on ABCTales.. I bet he could tell a few stories.. (prompt for you to suggest suitable usernames) Enjoyed meeting all of you again.. Martin, Missi, LadyWriter, Hoxtoneye, Fish for brains, Wiggins, Ralph.. As for the rest: Wolfie has wolves eyes, Eddie.. nice man but sh*t poems, AJ who passes her crutches around, BobbleHat bobbless, Justyn smooth in Burgundy.. Stormy.. er lovely stormy p*ssed as a fart, Robert and Stephen splendid chaps and lovely Liana who has tattoos in places you would not believe.. I emerged with a few treasures in my pockets.. BobbleHats poem booklet 'nothing else to do'.. print out of 'Whoccyblabber' from Eddie.. Liana's poem booklet with 'artistic' pictures on the cover, Karls self hypnosis tape 'How to make friends' (I shall be reporting).. .. and hardly a dent in my wallet despite not being without a drink throughout.. ..what I call a successful night. When's the next one.

..thought I'd post twice to make up for earlier absence

I reckon I was the last man home (8pm Monday). Had a great weekend. It was very interesting (and quite surreal) to match faces to names at the Poetry Cupboard. I'm just sorry I didn't have more time to spend with the ABC'ers - I was busy catching up on news with the people I brought with me, one of whom I hadn't seen for 11 years. I really enjoyed hearing Liana and Barenib read. I was impressed by how friendly everyone was. Thanks to all for a very enjoyable evening. I'll be back.

Am I home? Did Stormy's liver survive? Why is there never a chinese takeaway open when you really need one? Answers on a pancake roll please.

Well-- I'M ON!

Well, I posted to the old thread around midnight, just to let everyone know that .....well, take a look for yourselves..... On the other hand it looks like I'm the first one up, even at this late hour.:)) I'll be interested to hear what happened after I left. We may never know the full truth. :)) Though there is video tape of some of it.

Hi mississippi, I wish to thank you and everybody else for looking after my wife AJ,she told me she had a smashing time and looking forward to the next meeting or piss up ROB

It's what friends are for.

What happened after you left Justyn? Why, thyme stopped of course.....inevitable really...

Now that I'm suitably rested and my recall is in full working order I think I might be able to do justice to the events of..er...when was it? I left home early yesterday in order to see a friend in Denmark St. and scour the bookshops in the area (Helterskelter is the BEST music and related, bookstore in London, forget Foyles!). Having reduced my liquid assets to the tune of £50 and increased my burden by the combined weight of 6 books I took the tube up to Kings Cross to meet AJ off the 2.31 from Doncaster. After a little confusion involving hotels not being able to book rooms properly, AJ was shunted from her original hostelry just off New Oxford St. to another in Warren St. We eventually made our way to Piccadilly Circus, partly because I felt Jackie should see at least one of the 'sights' of dear old London town, but mainly because P.C. is at the junction of the Bakerloo and Piccadilly lines and Karl, who had been to a ***S Club 7*** concert with his family, was heading into town to meet AJ and I for a pre-piss-up piss-up, (I should state here that I am not a drinker but Karl and Jackie more than make up for me!). Karl duly arrived around 5.30 I guess and we took the Piccadilly line 2 stops east to Covent Garden where we installed ourselves in the nearest pub for said pre-piss-up piss-up piss-up. We drifted into the Poetry Cafe around 7ish and found Justyn the lone taler, having made introductions and got another drink we disappeared downstairs to an empty room and commandeered the only sofa, at the back of the room. A list of those attending as far as I can remember, Hoxtoneye 1Legspider Wolfgirl Martin T Ralph Fish Stormy Ladywriter Eddie Steve Gardiner Robert Liana Karl AJ Justyn Barenib Oh, and I think I was there too, although there are those that would disagree. If I've omitted anyone I apologise; please add your names yourselves. It's with a heavy heart I have to blow Stormy's credibility, and tell everyone that he arrived 'rat-arsed' and almost incoherent! I shall view his postings in future in an entirely different light! Steve did the MC bit for our lot with 'proper' intros (the organising MC just stood up and cried out 'Joe Bloggs'....'Fred Smith'...etc...for the rest!). One the most revealing snippets to emerge from Steves intros was the fact that apparently Liana is 'good in bed'. (Liana maintained a dignified silence!) Our bit of the evening went off fine (I videoed all of it I think, and I'm happy to make a limited amount of copies for interested parties) whereupon Karl, AJ and myself along with Justyn adjourned to the bar upstairs, and after being told we couldn't talk by an irate woman taking cash at the door, to the pub on the corner. We were eventually joined by almost all of our 'lot' where we passed the rest of the evening examing Fish's new black bra (and some of the contents that were spilling out!),and Liana's tattoos, or at least one of the more respectably sited ones. Having bid farewell to all present I eventually escorted AJ back to her hotel and headed for home, arriving at 2.10am. Completely knackered, I nevertheless, logged on and registered my safe arrival! There were other rather dubious goings on that I will leave to others to gossip about!

I think we all agreed on one thing: the Poetry Cafe is not such a good venue for us. The biggest problem is size: it is just too small for the crowds that we tend to generate. I think Embers or the Camden Head are much better physically and seem to be much better managed facilities for that matter. My personal favorite is that upstairs room at Camden Head. Still, it was a very enjoyable evening and in due course there will no doubt be photos and videos circulating.

Missi has a michievous Hobbit's face and a rascally head of hair to match. Stormy was a little merry but still very lovely. It was just an astonishing experience to bring 'fictional' characters to life; it was soemwhat of a surreal moment. How foxy and warm Liana and Fishybone were, full of merriment and poetess-up-to-no-goodisms. Karl, for all his forum fondling, has such a very gentle face and manner. Justyn is dapper, considered and interesting. In fact, I am truly proud of knowing such a bright, funny bunch of people... (wipes away a tear, blows nose and remembers that I have only had a few hours sleep). After I left The Sun, I weaved my way back to King's Cross Station, where my other half was setting up props for a film shoot. I fell over a lady in the tunnel and apologised profusely for knocking a syringe that she was about to plunge into her arm, onto the floor. She was not oriental, but I could have sworn that said something like 'Tuck Soo'. Then I spent a couple of hours freezing my butt off on a platform while man worked, chatting up construction men and bored British Rail security men, who told me endless and involved stories about the murders they had witnessed. Then saw a woman fall over, fall over again and again until she was dragged to her train along the floor, in a scene which looked like a comedy sketch from 'Smack The Pony'. You're writers...you'd understand why this was a fascinating end to an equally fascinating evening.......

I remained my poised and dignified self throughout, as I have reputation to maintain. After all I am the grannie of the site and as was commented upon more than once from a certain writer I look like Germaine Greer. 'nuff said, you know who you are!! Despite being my prim and proper self I had a BALL. Thanks guys and gals you're all BRILL. Ps Not true about pre-piss up etc I NEVER touched a drop, of water that is. PPS I don't think we'd be welcome at the Poetry Cafe again anyway after being escorted through the door.

had a fine old time ... agree that the venue was not the best but glad ABC had a chance to flaunt its wares ... and what lovely wares they were too ... enjoyed all the abc readers ... barenib liana and eddie ... was great to see the talers again ... and what an impressive turnout ... and also lovely to meet a few i hadn't ever met before ... specially wolfie and aj and barenib all delightful and nothing like the back end of buses at all ... ... and was very good to meet sgardiners better half and get the chance to apologise for capering noisily round her house after the last event ...it IS odd how people are so different from how you imagined ... spent a good deal of the evening holding up Stormy Pissedtrel and believe i made a creative contribution to missi's video with some odd angles and a bit of twisting (BEHIND the camera i hasten to add) ... midlands contingent are back from the smoke ... all slightly tired and emotional ... looking forward to the next one? ... not arf ...

A great evening. For all of us, our social life is expanding from what was originally an online community to an almost private club. It's a lot of fun. At 4.30 this morning I was woken up by my wife saying, "Turn the bloody telly off, will you? Why don't you come to bed instead of sleeping down here all night?" At 6.30 I was woken up my little boy saying, "Daddy, what are you doing sleeping down here in your clothes?" I went to bed without brusing my teeth. However, it makes me feel better to realise that Stormy must have felt like @!#$ this morning.

i am loathe to report that an unabashed stormy was this morning witnessed scoffing a LARGE brekkie with quite alarming vigour ... perhaps he is the sort who gets those Delayed Hangovers ...

I don't think so Alison, after an in depth discussion of the winged ones drinking habits it became clear that he is a 'professional' drinker with many years of practice under his belt. the only surprising thing is that he wasn't sporting the usual drinkers beer gut!

What a good do, despite the location. I don't want to whinge to much about the poetry cafe, as they are at least trying to promote people performing their work. But it was just too hot and cramped - I had to leave before the end and was forced to rehydrate with Flowers best at the watering hole around the corner. Great to catch up with people I'd spoken to at the last event, and to see new faces. It is a strange experience matching virtual people with the real thing: Wolfie is at least three feet shorter than I had imagined. Stephen has asked me to write a review of the evening. I know that some reports change names to protect the innocent, and for a small fee I can be persuaded to do the same for the guilty. Visa / American Express / Switch all accepted.

Thanks guys, I'll admit to have been tempted to write a "all, all alone" thread last night, but was too afraid that I would then answer myself. I'm glad you all had such a great time and that you wrote the highlights for us poor sods who wern't there. any more gossip will be deliciously consumed immediately. *rocks herslfy back and forth singing 'nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I think I'll go and eat worms' in an insane and frankly quite disturbing manner*

you look more like fish than fish. as in michael fish. :>)

Vicky: you MUST go to the next one. Great time had by all.

but DOES STORMY HAVE A MOUSTACHE???

yes fey ... he does ...

a big one!!

Yes we know dear, but about the moustache.

Well, during the time of this event, I was on a lone 130 mile trip to Kansas City, just for the heck of it! It's a bit strange. I've never driven to Kansas City myself. (My family had driven me there several times). And, I swear, I went there using one route and came back a completely different way, unintentionally! I was, however, thrilled that on the way back, I avoided the toll road. (And I have an extry $1.85 because of it!) Although, I'm still with Vicky. I felt like eating a couple of worms, sitting in that car all alone.

...and a bloody jolly good time was obviously had by all...whinge, moan, whine. gripe, grumble...

*collapses into bed...* have JUST arrived home.....

I'm there Aj, put me on the list. With any luck I'll be away from the madness by the time another one is organised and I can do what I bloody want for a change. I could do with a night out. Dog, I wouldn't recommend worms as good eating, not enough protein. Slugs are mush better, far more variety. On a personal note I would just like to add that I have finaly slipped into the depths of despair and I'm off to get rip-roaring drunk in order to start Monday morning off in the traditional hangover induced fashion. If anyone wants me I intend to come out of a comatose state in approximately 9 hours.

Bobblehat was there too and I enjoyed meeting him as well as everyone else. I spent some time this afternoon reading his collection of poems that he handed out .... very good indeed. Wolfie was a delight to meet and all i can say is that there must be some attractive rear ends of buses where she lives. Finally met the luvverly Dubberly and the clever 'Fingers' Handelaar. My liver is coming along nicely and I have only had one beer tonight as I feel sorry for it. I think I told you I would have a drink everynight missi in reply to your query about whether I drink often. I didn't say I get lashed out of my head everynight and I certainly would not be able to type in that state let alone post in the forum. It was the FishLiana's fault anyway.... starting me off on strong vodka cokes on an empty stomach at 3pm. Still, gave you all something to talk about didn't it?

*refuses to take responsibilty*

*or to even spell it*

Dear All I thought the music was nice. Kind of 'Everything But The Girl' on Lucazade. It was a night that did not live up to its expectations for many reasons. Socially it was good with writers that I had not personally met joining the ABC affray. The venue is awful, fridge pschiatric white-room car-hire style. Plastic chairs are a big turn off. The Poetry Cafe received a lot of funding to make the place work as a performance venue and they have failed in a dazzling manner. The atmosphere is also joyless which makes the performer and the listener overwork themselves. For poetry performance to be popular, it has to be fun and dramatic but not earnest. Everyone deserved something a whole lot better in my opinion. Shame I dd not get a longer chance to chat with Robert. Bobblehat is a very sweet man who we all want to make dinner for. Liana: You naughty thing. Did it wiggle, wiggle and tickle? Performance of the night : Stormy by a long chalk. Love you all Ralph

Sounds great! Can you cook?

I was trying hard to develop your web persona Stormy. I always wanted to be involved with the creation of a legend!

Ralph - I always thought it was wiggle giggle and tickle....i bow to your superior knowledge though..... However, back to important things... i TOLD YOU SO (poetry cafe tiny and cheerless) How i do love saying that.... BUT, the sheer delight, the hooting and merriment of the entire day and night was absolutely marvellous. I dont think I have recovered yet. I am hoping that the photos Fish took will come out (did i really let her loose with my camera??) Justyn - look forward to reading the review. Wolfie - back end of a bus indeed!! There is a distinct possibility that if Johnny Depp appears, he will fancy you more than me. That will never do, and I may have to murder you now. Missi - thank you for the book, you lovely lovely man, and AJ - that was lovely! :o) Steven Gardiner - not only smoochy voiced, but smoochy faced, though I developed vertigo looking up at him. Karl - exactly how i thought you would be, Ralphie - not at all how I thought youd be. Eddie Gibbons was my biggest delight - what a wonderful man... how funny and kind he is. Shopping Forecast made me weep with laughter.... I had a great time. Cant wait til the next do.... The poetry cafe can work better than that - when i read there before it was at a multi media do, there were more sofas and squishy chairs with tables too. Made it seem smaller, but was much more cheering, with music and films and text projected onto the wall... So, the poetry cafe receives funding for that? thats loony.... maybe we should start a new venue....

So, when ABCtales achieves charitable status we will get some luscious trust funding and open a bar/cafe (in Skeggy for centralness) that will feed everyones overindulgences and prey on all our weaknesses and have us all in rehab and detox(toneye) before you can say "rhyming couplet". Hmmm, very charitable aims. I like it.

Liana 'Wiggle giggle and tickle' you are right of course. It was lovely meeting you too Liana, a pleasant surprise. So glad that we did not make each other flinch. Fifty grand is a lot of money to waste on a soulless white room. Stephen, you know we can do a better job than that. Ralph

*signing up for photography course*

I have just discovered the delights of free net access at our local library. This is serious. I could develop a five times a day forum habit. Is there a clinic? I must say that I am truly looking forward to another of ABCtalers reading their work.....Eddie Gibbons is a natural performer, hilariously witty and seriously deserving of a wider audience. Good to hear that Stormy has finally emerged coherent and fighting forum fit. Did you know there are books in this library as well as computers and videos? Must go and check some out. 1Legspider remarkably quiet...could be exhausted, perhaps...with all that web spinning of course.... What else did you think I meant?

...was disappointed that Stuart didn't turn up, or if he was there, made himself known to us... apparently he has 3 body piercings...as has liana....6 in all....might have been too noisy if they were both in the same room, all that metal rattling... loved meeting liana for the first time, and bobblehat, and wolfgirl...all were lovely as were the talers I had met before...of course.

i agree wolfie ... so when is the next event then? i think one of the reasons for the great ABC turnout was the fact that the event was on a saturday night ... week nights can be offputting ... so if we combine a weekend with another venue we'll be laughing ... (any excuse to book into a swanky hotel ...) two other things: i ate KFC for the first time ... (thank you for THAT experience) somehow got my hands on a bobblehat collection and just wanted to say his poem "carrot and stick" made me hoot ...

...forgot to mention stormy...apologies to him...he was a scream of course...he looked sort of military...like an ex-officer of the guards....

Hi Martin. You were a gentle soul too, just like Karl. A great aura of calm washed over me amongst you lot (without the aid of alcohol or drugs, I might add Mary Whitehouse-like). Ralph reminded me of Ben Elton though...the quick speech, humour and glint in his eye I might add...not that he wore a nasty shiny suit...... Glint in his EYES, I should say...he did have two. Stephen Gardiner was indeed a very tall silver birch....very naughty to allude to Tony Cook's contrasting lack of hair when poor chap was not that to defend himself. Someone is toupee, no doubt...

yes, wasnt marty gentle? though rather nervous looking following that Very Brave "2 women close to 40" remark he made..... *still havent forgiven him*

yes i noticed him surrounding himself carefully with a posse of blokes ... hmmm ...

glad he looks FAR nearer to 40 than WE do Fish... didnt you think? :o)

yes darling ... nearer to it from the OTHER side i'd say ... hahahhahaaa ...

it must be because we keep ourselves so fit sweety.. abstention is always good for the skin... no alcohol, no fags... you see marty? where you are going wrong?