A Christmas Tale
Fri, 2004-12-24 16:46
#1
A Christmas Tale
Twas Christmas Eve on the forum,
The snow was falling fast...
missi wiped his brow, it had been a tiring day, delivering presents to greco and stephen, he was plum tuckered out....
he poured himself a glass of christmas cheer...
... he thought lovingly of Rita, reclining on her evening balcony in Pune with a large lime soda ... such a shame that he'd missed the Christmas post to India, the beautiful writing set he'd bought her would have to wait until the New Year ... but the rival for his affections, the self-appointed beauty of Ontario, would be shivering in the sub-zero Canadian afternoon. He quickly nominated her latest two poems as "great writes" and E-Mailed his enthusiastic critique to his woman of today ...
Devastated when his e-mail was rejected by the server in Iceland, he elected to deliver the critique by hand.
Stuffing his wallet with credit cards and checking his passport, Missieeeeeieeeee made his way to Heathrow via taxi.
His destination...Ontario.
On the way however, he decided, after much serious soul-searching and frantic hair-combing, to make a quick pit-stop at a certain windmill in Amsterdam...
*gggrrrrr, thinks this thread was a bad idea already*
He had, of course, paid a visit to The Windmill in a previous incarnation, during a Christmas past, heavily disguised as A Nice Guy - even bearing wondrous gifts, such as A Ruby Cherry Brooch and Other Marvellous Things, which all bore the heart-warming message, 'Thanks for being a mate', imprinted upon them, in his own fair hand and accompanied, moreover, by many best wishes.
Photographs of various escapades had been taken and exchanged, and were treasured greatly, and preserved with loving care.
On this visit, pre-Ontario, and having perused, although not fully sampled, the delights of Windmill City in the dim and distant past, and being asked, most kindly, by A Higher Being, to revert to his former kind self, he resolved to...
*Nominates Missi's last post for the 'understatement of the year award.'*
*Nominates Alumbloom for 'The most obnoxious twat of the year award.'*
Merry Xmas everyone...Pah!!! Bumhug!!!
*smiles*
A bumhug, eh?! That’ll make a nice focking stiller.
Anyway picking up from post 4...
... he was determined to teach the educationally sub-normal idiot that was single-handedly reducing the reputation of Canada to a mere joke, that people around the world will not tolerate the kind of behaviour that home-taught fools like her confine themselves to. In his case was a cleverly concealed text book on the English language and it's usage. He knew that the Canadian customs were on the lookout for subvesive texts of this nature but he still felt obliged to force it on her. (He was also determined to force the book on her too) As he boarded the plane he noticed the person sitting in the next seat was wearing...
*Nods sageandonionly at Flash's post*
And thereby hangs a tale!
Another thread ruined by a twerp!
No Flashy, NOT you.
Having disguised Ian Healey as a proper person he is sent to Windmill Shitty to seek out a self-serving woman who is also in disguise. Hers is easily seen through though so even someone as dim as Ian will be able to see her for what he is.
*removes alums nomination award due to the fact he doesn't like the idea of a repugnant vile scum bag having the chance of winning something*
**smiles**