Gordon Brown's Cabinet Shock.!

Now we know why the Spice Girls have reformed, Gordon Brown wants them in his cabinet.

Posh Spice will head the Nutritional Guidance Unit for schools. Lettuce is thought to figure predominantly.

Ginger Spice will head the new Sexual Advice Dept for schools. It's thought her vast active experience in this field (usually on her back) swung it in her favour.

Baby Spice of course heads the Paedophile Sic 'Em Out unit. She has a pair of gold plated nut crackers she says, but remains enigmatic about their potential use.

Sporty Spice is of course seconded to the All England Club and promises that any British player who doesn't get into the second week of Wimbledon, she knows where she can get her hands on a pair of gold plated nut crackers.

Scary Spice will accompany Tony Blair to the Middle East as Peace Envoy (sic). She will be arm wrestling tanks in front of the nabobs of Hamas and Fatah. She says that if that doesn't make them make peace with each other, she knows where she can lay her hands on a pair of gold plated etc. etc..