*** TA CHUCKS ***

Liana Frowns in "d'you think l hang round ta chucks all day waiting for you" manner. Defected to The Varsity today with Fishwife and Andrew. Very nice :o)

Si just sits there and thinks " Ooh well. Another person I should have talken to". He grabs another Gin and Miltonic and thinks of another 'loser type' poem to write.

So did I hear money off Pedest ale? If so count me in.

fgghhhhssss is you shore this is orange jusch? I I I I think it's tha besht I've ever tashted. BESHT I EVER TASTED *Does a little jig on the table* Does thish jukey box av achey breaky heart?

Very glad that the film crew have finally packed up and gone. I understand that they're going to put most of the regulars in as CGI effects, as no actors were suitable. I have a lovely poodle stole that I am going to wear to the premiere. My slim volume turned out to be so slim that I now can't find it. I'm sure I put it down near that ashtray. Maybe someone has used my slim volume as a roll-up. Anyone in tonight Hilda ?

Me geeting quite drank on tose Sin and Slytonics. BUUUURRRRPPP!

IFB = Sharon Stone? What plaque?? *Bob hates child actors*

studiously ignoring andrew pack and his alleged stylish accoutrements *puffing on roll up*

pops in for a quickie. where's El Poop?

HIC HIC....Hic ...hic...sooo tthiiiis is chucks ta..hic ...I mean bar ta chucks...no Iz ....meanz bucks tucks...ta.. nope Iz meanz.. hic ..hic.. nice day ent it. whooos round pis it? Yours saageteeeeeee...hic hic...

no stormy ... NOT sharon stone ...

I I I I I jes wanted to shay that y-y-y-ou guysh are great...really great...[tearfully]I luv you guysh all-all-almost as much as luv mi pint ....glupglupglupglup. !! ALRIGHT WHICH ONE OF YOU B"@#8%#DS SHTOLE MI CLOTHES!!!

AWWWW I can just see you on THAT chair as Bob plays the detective. How about Jamie Lee Curtis (droolndribble) in the scene where Cleese speaks Russian?

I couldn't resist seeing if I could pop this back to the top - I do miss Ta Chucks. We had some good times in here. Sadly, some of my ravings here still make sense to me. Any chance of reopening the old gaff, Hilda? Get some of this new crowd in here, Radiodenver, Emma, the charming girl from Aberdeen with good taste, whatshername Purple something? My lads at the Varsity invented a new cocktail last night - cider, Kronenburg, grapefruit Bacardi Breezer and Tequilla - it is called a (forgive me) "Mexican Lady-F**ker" and it is mighty fine. Can anyone witty/booze-raddled (yes, I'm looking at you Stormy) come up with a brand new cocktail list for Ta Chucks?

Another night creeps in, another night of Gin and Miltonics. Si looks around and then grabs his favourite beverage and hopes to finally chat to Liana and everyone else.

mmmmmmmmmm

or should that be ..... Macaw Lee Curtis? don't say mmmmmmmmmm like that. I'll have to go and lie down for a while now. stradislava pudenda boorsch vladimir niet lada tvorich anatoly vostock dominova da?

hilda!!!! what's all this about a JUKEBOX?????

*issues contract on obviously under-employed Tommy Steele fan in Lincoln*

Well bugger me... what a blast from the past! I will have to dust me pinny off...

thanks liana, even tho i told you to say that it still warms me old cockles.

I did go, honest! Just popped back for the post! Anyway, Hilda Dear, I've noticed that the redevelopment of the area makes it more difficult to locate your fine establishment. Perhaps you should consider leasing one of the newer properties in the Arndale front page emporium? I'm sure your existing clientele will be only to pleased to save themselves a load by dropping in at the new premises. yours in toilet roll repel my trots

...and where' the Guinness?...

er...yo all, I'm doin' the night shift, er...this is Hilda's yea? Bit confusin' with these superstars struttin' their *stuff* Just thought I'd pop in for a piece of the crack, a hair of the whippet, and a swift pedest ale or five. I'm going to hang around for a while to watch the auditioning. *rubbing hands* Oh by the way, if any of you spot my pet bluebottle Archie, give me a shout.

blimmy this place is going to the dogs ... may consider taking my business elsewhere ...

Nah, nah, nah - Ivoryfishbone's all sorted. Got that English bird off of ER. She's dyeing her hair black now. If she can just put on a posher accent, we'll be sorted. Strugglin a bit to cast Robert, Spaghetti Si and Fey. What we need is a bleedin plan, mate.

Miss Ivory, the jukebox is in my head. So just humour me. Ta Chucks rules!

Yes, but WHERE'S THE GUINNESS?? Would consider taking my business elsewhere too, if anyone'd have me...

Andrea, I'll buy you a Guinness! Guinness, takes nearly two minutes to pull the perfect pint. Nearly as long as people realising that my conversations are inane and childish.

*arrives at Ta Chucks making plenty of eye contact* *wonders where the 5 $ Shakes are* *sheepishly realises he suggested them in the wrong thread* *Leaves quietly without making any eye contact*

mmmmmmmmm ..... elizabeth corday ... perfect ... and she is SO much more sexy than madonna ... and yes ... she could do some voice coaching ... ewan for spag si?

NOT FAIR!!! NOT FAIR! I am the one that doesn't make eye contact! No-one is as shy as me, dammit!

You following me? *he said without looking)

Wasn't I here before you? Can't remember as I didn't see you come in due to my eyes looking at the floor.

Si is heading out of here as someone is stealing my thunder :) Some of us have work to do.

I hear Ta Chucks is opening a London branch on Tooting Common called Ta Ducks, where whelks and liquor are to be served - is there any truth in this?

I am SO not getting drawn into whether Elizabeth Corday is sexier than Madonna. Hilda, what's with all these cockney mockney geezers ? And all these Sainsbury's bags littered around the place ? And is that... nah, it can't be bloody Toploader on the fantasy jukebox, how did they get on there ? I'll just have a word with the new chef - alright chuck, what's cooking tonight, like ? "Pukka, sorted, blindin'. I'll just bung it all in the blender, some fresh herbs from me winder box, bit of buffalo mozarella, they do this at Sainsbury's now me old china... pukka. " HILDA ! What's going on ?

YESSSSSSSSS Ewan McGregor! But would he fancy Edith Sitwell?

Right, Alex Kingston, this is your line okay "I am agog. " Practice it, you'll be saying it a lot. And keep old of that poodle, for Gawd's sake, or the whippet'll have it for breakfast. I've had calls from Catherine Z-Jones and Anna Friel, they both wanna be in it - they say they wanna play someone elfin, but if Emily gets some acting lessons, maybe she could play herself. I still need a Robert, a Mandylifeboats, a Si and an Andrea. And Mark Y-B is gonna be Mark Radcliffe or Colin Firth, I've not sorted that out yet.

errr excuse ME mr. ritchie ... I'll have you know that this poodle is a STANDARD poodle and not one of those piddly little toy poodles ... it is a big masculine macho super poodle and i defy any scrawny flea bitten whippet to get the better of it ... *huffily* ms. fishbone

Ah, I geddit - you think there should be a dog-fighting scene in the domino hustling movie ? Bit strong love, but hang on... It's an underground dog-fighting club, where bored pedigree pampered dogs go to feel like wild animals again... The first rule of Kennel Club, is YOU do not talk about Kennel Club - like it, like it. (Note for Madonna's US Attorneys - the real Guy Ritchie does not in any way endorse dog-fighting in any sense)

Can I be "Sicko Si" the mad scissor weilding poodle pamperer? Let me know Guy, I want that role.

hey hilda ... nice to see the old place with its own proper and fitting position ... and .... where shall i sit? any suggestions ... *eyes pontificator's pedestal and Knock em back table* hair of the whippet please ...

I worry about you Si, really I do. I'm thinking of Christian Bale for your role; or Jack Nicholson if I can get him to have twelve face-lifts. Primal Scream for soundtrack of dominoes movie ? "Junkies keep scoring, whores keep on whoring, Ivory double-fouring... Get your knocks off, get your knocks off honey, shake it now now, get em off downtown. " (Sadly only Richard w and Robert are likely to appreciate this gag, but I still wanted to make it. )

If I was a trifle younger, mate Guy, I'd be all gaggin' for the Sooper Poodle part (even if it IS a huge macho hound and I'm only a tiny, delicate lapdog). As it is, I'll just have to offer meself up for the challenging role of...er...Whip-it.

didn't primal scream have a lyric which went "ivy, ivy .. you destroy me ..."

I have noticed that no one ever pops in any more Hilda. But it's your own fault for not listening! I told you no one wants a long walk.

Hey, someone mentions Chesterfield football team on this thread. My original home town...I used to play round at Jamie Hewitt's house when I was a kid...you know, the one that scored THAT goal...finishing him up with a front pager in The Times.

It sounds marvelous. Dunno if I could match rhyme with others. I'd love to see the whippet though. lol

hey si nice to see you ... can i get you a drink?