Am I a fish?

Listen we've got enough loonies operating on this forum without you joining in.

How long have you been here, Jasper? And how many friends have you made?

Too long and none.

It is not that strange if you believe in the aquatic ape theory. In our ape-days, we would have taken to the water to look for high protein food like crustaceans, and that would have made our brain grow fast and helped us to stand up. it explains why babies can swim and why it is easier to give birth under water, why we are furless, and lots of other things.

I'm not quite furless, Milkstone...

Anyone ever recall seeing Jasper answer a direct question? I haven't the patience to go through the reams of his drivel. Come on Jasper - how long have you been here and how many friends have you made? And are you capable of seeing the point I'm making? Everyone else- come on, join the Jasper-predictability sweepstake, will his answer consist of :- (a) four paragraphs of mock-Burroughs drug-addled unreadable nonsense which utterly misses the point (b) eight paragraphs of randomly selected cut-and-pasted quotations intended to prove some point or other, but utterly missing the point (c) eight paragraphs of imaginary dialogue between Jasper and other people which not only utterly misses the point but is spectacularly unfunny (d) A mercifully short barrage of personal abuse, perhaps containing the always sidesplittingly funny reference to bodily parts or functions, the words "Sludge" "Flush" or "Sook" (e) A straight answer to a straight question. (f) Safe bet - more punctuation marks than in an average script for Neighbours. Shall we play?

You're doing it wrong, Jasper. Get them to study each other and tell you their findings.

If Japser's only goal was to hijack every thread and get everyone talking about him, I think he does very well indeed. Hats off to him, the guys a diva at it. A big thumbs down to the Forum administrators and ABC in general for letting him get away with it. Sensible discussion of writing: 1 out of 10 All threads whatever their content hijacked by a bastard: 10 out of 10 New people visiting this forum put off never to return: 10 out of 10 Level of irritability and time spent responding to this fuckwit: 10 out of 10 Oh yes, let us not forget...Free Speech: 1 out of 10 - yes 1 out of 10, there is no free speech on this forum, nothing is free of this annoying and irritating little turd.

Jasper, will you just get off your perch and stop carping on. You've got no sole!

flounder?

Mutant Guppy more like.

i am a fish ...

I hope I don't smell of fish. Know I am definitely an invertebrate - a mussel (mytilus edulis) or a barnacle (semibalanus balanoides) perhaps.

This forum needs a full time Psychoanalysis. Now they think they are a blood fish!

*Attaches self to rock, waves cilia in the air* Nice plankton!

Their can be only one answer to that Jude.. Amoeba Proteases. *Scratches head with stupid look on faces* Waves Cilia to Jude. ~:

Isn't this the idyllic existence! Under the sea, in an octapus' (cephalopod mollusc's) garden How are you John btw?

Very well thank Jude. How goes everything, any progress toward teaching Biology? Not sure what this thread is, but will be interesting to see if it progresses through the Kingdoms.. *Smiles*

I am counting down the weeks...only 10 weeks to go! I can't wait. I'm so excited about life it is so good! And I'm glad it's okay for you too!

My wishes go with you Jude. Keep smiling.

I've been a good boy so far, Tony!

I will *grins*

Which part? Top or bottom?

Please keep in mind that the part mermaid is under fourteen years of age.

Still, no-one has answered the essential 'fishiness' of my original missive...

Sorry KJ, I meant no offense to you. I wasn't sure whether everyone was aware of the child's age. Based on the child's comments on other threads I'm sure nothing anyone here could do or say would come as a shock to her. Yet it could save embarrassment to you or others to know she is a child. (and fairly illiterate with it.) I'm glad it's an adult site, and I certainly wouldn't say to anyone to tone down the adult nature of their comments. I have two small kids at home and I'm glad I get to be an adult somewhere, and speak openly. If a child wanders onto the site and can make some contribution to discussion, especially about writing then great. If she's just here for the titillation of chatting with adults, I don't want to buy into that.

half wit more like ...

...or you could just have sad lonely wank in front of the mirror.

Christ Burin, give the nanny nonsense a rest.

...Twat.

Sellotape your fingers together, George. x

This is an adult site, by that I mean it's not a site specifically for kids. You cannot expect the adults here to restrict their opinions and language to the third grade. The kids should go elsewhere if they can't contribute or accept on the prevailing level. Moreover they need to learn how to spell and stop using that awful...

i think i might bepart mermaid

In fairness, I suspect Burin had in mind the possibility that the conversation might move into flirtation - KJ isn't that sort of person, in my humble opinion, but in light of recent issues at this site, I think it was a timely and fair reminder.