What Do YOU Want For The Next 12 Mths?
Sun, 2005-01-02 19:45
#1
What Do YOU Want For The Next 12 Mths?
I don't know who Bill Borrows is apart from the fact that he wrote a column oin yesterdays Daily Mirror that had me in stitches. I've 'borrowed' a selection of Borrows column and invite you to add your own 'wants' for 2005. He wrote I want;
Busted to split up as promised and then to lose all their money in an ill-advised time-share scheme.
Prince Harry to be issued an ASBO preventing him from having ginger hair, ruddy cheeks and breeding.
The Blairs to actually pay for a holiday like the rest of us.
Manuals for all electrical equipment, especially mobile phones, to restricted to a maximum of 4 pages.
No more animated films.
Ron Atkinson to open the Notting Hill Carnival.
To those I would add;
Barclays bank to go broke.
The discovery of so much crude oil that the price drops to 2p a barrel.
The European court of Human rights to uphold the verdict that speed cameras are illegal.
Scoffing a whole Battenburg cake every day helps you lose 2lbs a week, strengthens your teeth and prolongs your life by 10yrs.
Scientists to discover a way of reversing the ageing process allowing me to be 25 again.
Please feel free to add your own 'wants'.
Brownie_1
Have you ever thought...
If we had world peace, with no devistation; death; loss; greed, envy and only happiness prosperity and wealth, what the heck are we all going to write about???
Rainbows and happiness just don't seem to do it for me or even sell from the book shelves days.
Who wants to read about great Aunt lucy's cat having kittens...
(They are cute though)
What a sad life we lead... sniggers...
J. Prince
Look, George, what is it about this forum and Busted? They are clean, healthy-living young men who write all their own instruments and play their own songs. They are innocently going about their business of racking up hit singles and small personal fortunes. What could be more commendable for young people? I'm sick of people coming on this forum and slagging off Busted and Bullseye.
Next thing you know you'll be telling me that S Club were rubbish and that Jo from S Club was not the most sexy of all the girls in S Club and S Club 7. Shame on you! You're a grown man. Stop casting aspersions on clean living young popstars and Bullseye! Apart from that, I hope the next twelve months bring the full quota of 365 days.
Liana
i saw a lovely bit of gossip on popbitch about one of the busted lads.
Clean living you say?
mississippi
Matt, I just copied that bit from the newspaper article. I don't even know who they ARE fer chrissakes. Is Elvis in the charts this week?
flash
hahahaha i knew it Busted are ladyboys!!!!
J. Prince
No, but he's releasing all his no.1 singles in the weeks to come in a (posthumous) bid to gain the 1000th no.1 single in the UK.
Liana, all of those boys go to church and are in their homes by 8pm sharp most nights (except Fridays which is youth club night and they get an extra hour).
mississippi
I think you'll find that 'he' is dead, mate.
J. Prince
You're joking?
flash
No, they are Jeffy honest.
mississippi
Well i called on him at Graceland 2 mths ago and the cook said she'd cancelled the banana and peanut butter order!
Liana
sorry jeff, did you say in their "homes"?
J. Prince
That's bad news for all Elvis lovers the world over.
Liana - if they do stay up later than 9pm it's likely that they're practising new dance routines and/or quietly strumming their instruments.
mississippi
never heard it called strumming before. Spanking, yes. Tugging, yes, but STRUMMING!
flash
Bloody hell even i rejected that joke.
J. Prince
Get with it, Flashmaster!!!!
Rachel
I would like a happy healthy child with small shoulders please.
flash
Actually he beat me to it to be honest.
flash
There's life in the old dog yet.
mississippi
I got another want;
All the gypos, pikeys and dids to move to Middlewich.
mississippi
And a large pelvis?
Rachel
Well no because, a) it would look silly, a bit like a warning triangle and b) it would defeat the object of having small shoulders.
Rachel
Oh I see, you meant me? Well, we wouldn't want it falling out in Sainsbury's but yes, I suppose it might help.
(Not much danger of that. As Midwife said yesterday "Cor, he's a big bugger". I think I was supposed to be proud but instead came out in sweats).
Ely Whitley
...take your bottom lip in a pair of pliers
... pull it out as far as you can until the pain is no longer bearable
... now pull it over your head until you can taste the tag in the collar of your shirt
childbirth, nature's wonder!
flash
My friends sister asked her mum before her first child
Is giving birth as bad as say, like shitting a Melon mum?
oooooooo no dear, it's ten times worse than that!!!!
I don't know how she was able to make the comparison, but it's a true story.
Hox
To be able to read a thread which hasn't been hijacked by a trolling no-life social misfit with an inferiority complex and a tendency to masturbate in public.
oh, and world peace.
[%sig%]
Rachel
Thanks both, that helps so much.
There's still a long way to go and the torture has started already. This morning there were two women on my doorstep demanding to take blood samples. I told them where they could stick their needles and it wasn't in me. Exchange also included bizzarest argument I've ever had in my life:
Me: I don't need to be tested for Sickle Cell, I'm white european
Woman: Yes but you might have had intercourse with a man from another ethnic background and he might be the baby's father.
Me: But I haven't
Woman: but you might have
Me: No, I definitely haven't
Woman: Yes but you might have
etc. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRr.....................
mississippi
They obviously judge everyone else by their own promiscuous standards.
jude
lolol...is that for real Rach?
mississippi
Ooooo Eamonn, you're so outspoken these days! I like it.
Rachel
Dead serious. They wanted 8 tubes of blood for everything from blood group etc. to Syphillis, HIV and SickleCell. I said they could have one and share it out carefully. And they could have it when I decided and not when they decided they had the time to come and doorstep me like a couple of bailiffs (considering they should have done all this three months ago they didn't really have a leg to stand on). They looked a bit put out, but honestly, in their profession, you'd think they'd know better than to mess with a pregnosaurus.
flash
I wonder who he means?
jude
I want to bevcome a better person, become slightly more learned and slightly less foolish, drink less cider and more champagne, sing more tunefully and dance. I want to see council and income tax cut and the higher tax rate threshhold raised.
rose
I want to become a calm, less stressed out person. I want my finances to look less like a war zone and I want peace.
Also Arsenal to win the EPL and the CL