Til the Leaves Come Falling Down

As stated before, I am all new to this, so can anyone explain how my harmless little story has been given an 18 rating, it really isnt that sexy or scary ? Mary

I can't see why either Mary. Sometimes submissions are inappropriate for the age-rating entered by the author and are caught by the swear-filter (which also 'spikes' stories with unfamiliar words). Editors clearing the 'spike' have the ability to change the rating before approving the submission. Perhaps there was a glitch in the approval process. 'Til the Leaves Come Falling Down' now has a 'U' rating. [%sig%]

Mary, and anyone else whose stuff comes out at 18 (there is an awful lot lately) but should be a U or whatever, don't forget the default setting is now 18 and not U like it used to be. When you create a story there is a box on the page for you to select your rating. If you ignore it your piece comes out as 18. I would imagine that's what happened to Mary's story ... it would be highly unusual for something innocent to be upgraded by an editor.

What a lovely suprise to have such a nice comment made on the story. Mary

Can we have a link, please?

Tried to find it but failed miserably

I think it is at http://www.abctales.com/story/37824 It is Cherry Picked, what ever that means. Love Mary

Cheery Picked means selected by one of the editors are particularly good Mary

I enjoyed it. Liked the falling leaves link with the past. I thought it could've done with a bit of tightening up, in the sense that some sentences are very wordy and there's quite a bit of repetition. [%sig%]

thanks for thr feedback. If anyone else wants to comment, I will then try and edit it. All comments welcome, as this is my first ever attempt at a story. Love Mary

As the Editor who cherry picked it I am astounded that this is your first piece of writing. I agree that a little tightening would help but not too much. It needs the space that it has, if that makes any sense. Keep on writing - we want more!

I read this with interest as I felt able to identify with where this was coming from. I'm probably the same age as the woman in the story, and have those treasured uni moments/relationships etc that I like to write about and work through occasionally. The hardest thing is trying to make it appeal to a wide audience; finding a reason for wanting others to read it. I agree with Tony that we want more. I don't feel involved with the romance enough yet. I am always very conscious with my writing that my own little romantic intrigues etc may well be utterly tedious to others, (ok, no need to rush in and agree everyone) so it is important to sort out your priorities in terms of what you want to communicate to people - why do you think they might benefit from reading your story? Make us connect more, get us going. I liked the setting, and I think Mary has managed on the whole to keep away from the cliches of this sort of story. I felt the tension build up and really felt myself wanting to know what the story behind the relationship was, with that nice leaves image which seemed so significant. However, I will say that sometimes it rambled too much and I started to speed read, like the part on the coach for example, and I agree about too much repetition, I became disengaged at times. I felt very much that this was like an experiment in starting to write - which is exactly what it is, as you say it's your first attempt at a story. In this sense I can excuse the way it all leads up to her putting pen to paper and writing 'Chapter One'. I don't like poems about poems or writing about writing on the whole, and found that all a bit contrived. I think this story can stand on it's own without such contrivances. I also thought the dialogue a bit strained occasionally. However, all that said, there is a confidence in the writing that shows enjoyment in telling the tale, in communicating. Crikey though, you've made a great start.

I liked this Mary and could certainly stand to see some more. Occasionally the dialogue is a little stilted, but not in an offensive way, and I think it sort of fits the characters - the simplicity of it was nice, and it captures the mood and feelings that it sets out to. There were some decent little hooks in there - why did she walk away from him, what was the promise about falling leaves, that got me interested. Very fine piece of writing, and welcome to the site.

for those who did not find the link, heres a helping hand