native britons

Simons Schama's 'A History of Britain' is a good read (or three).

i swear you're giving me flashbacks.

jasper, chucky and mummy are actually of german descent, saxe coburg is their family name i think, they changed it to windsor about 90 years ago during the first world war...

Well, according to the book 'Artemis Fowl: The Eternity Code' (by Eoin Colfer) Stonehenge was a pizza parlor.

Ohhh, what was that I heard last year...Stonehenge is shaped like a woman's vagina... I'd bet it's a hot spot for tourists eah?

england wasn't really the saxon-anglo's land tho was it? They stole it from the celts, and the celts stole it from the beaker people; and whether the beaker people stole it from someone else I don't know, there must have been a time when the whole place was covered in forest - maybe the original inhabitants were a lost race, maybe they were elves...

Thing is...sexual symbolism survived along with many other pagan customs us Xstians inherited! I read an absolutely fascinating article by a Dominican Friar called Herbert McCabe (a bit of a wild one)...apparently in the Easter Vigil service, the plunging of the Paschal Candle into the water in the font is a phallic sybol being plunged into the womb of the Church, fertilising it and bringing new life! A highly sexual fertility rite...most people miss this though!

I think Freud knew more than most people care to admit.

I quite happily care to admit that Freud knew heaps. He'd agree with why I like latte with a slotty lid.

Martin, I think the wanky windsors original family name was actually Battenburg, hence the old git insisting on being Lord Mountbatten. Battenburg was seen as too provocative in England after the first world war. Roswald! hahahahahahahaha

Ferg, My latte straw keeps getting bigger. Please explain.

I thought Prince Albert was Sax Co berg Gotha

Fayed reckons the scots where egyptians and so do some scots, i know theres a secret sect of scots who believe they carried the remains of Jesus to scotland and that his bones are actually burried there today, although, i think in reality most scots hail from the celtic race in the Glasgow area and maybe the romans have strong representation in the Edinburgh area.

First people were Golgafrinchians!

Ummmm.... you're trying to get too much through the straw at once...?

maybe it's the latte that's getting smaller

Or it's wishful thinking...

Or they do it deliberately to make you *think* the latte is getting smaller, and so buy a bigger one.

they must be turning in their graves at the state of the telephones :0)

Funky. The place was covered in forest and the inhabitants segregated from the rest of Europe due to global warming. When the romans first landed they described the majority of early brits as having long golden hair, hence the name "angles." Nothing to do with anglo's as one would assume. I'm trying to recall what I've read so any errors are entirely my fault.

remembering that the romans landed and then left centuries before they conquered.

The Angles actually came from the part of Europe that is now North Germany/Southern Denmark; the Saxons came from a little lower (well, Saxony). There was a tribe the Romans called the Brittanii; but they weren't called Angles by the Romans! That came after the Romans left in c. 410 C.E. . The Angles began calling the land Anglaland, and the people Anglalisc. The Romans had all the other tribal names, though: Iceni, Catavellaunii, etc.

And funky, I'm not sure we'll ever figure out who the first Britons were. The island was obviously inhabited during the warm spells in the last Ice Age but they were hunter/gatherers; we can know only bits and pieces about their culture because hunter/gatherer cultures don't leave much in the way of material archaeology to work with. The Beaker people were a settled culture, I think, to have sophisticated pottery; nomadic cultures usually have very little in the way of pottery (it gets broken during migration and it's usually very rudimentary). So, who were they before they were the Beaker people...no doubt related to the same peoples living in the valleys of France at the time, since the island wasn't an island back then... maybe some geneticist will figure it out.

are you sure such people existed. I think maybe the britons where a cross section of all these people who managed to live peacefully together and started ibreeding.

and so may she goonandonandon

I thought the first human in GB was Piltdown Man and his fossilized cricket bat.

LOL denver... Chronological Outline of Prehistoric, Celtic, Roman, and Anglo-Saxon England Paleolithic & Mesolithic periods from 250,000 years ago to around 5,000 BC Neolithic period, c. 5000-2000 BC, agriculture, mound tombs Non-Indo-European people New Grange, Ireland, 3200 B.C., passage grave. Stonehenge I & II (2800-2000 B.C.) Bronze Age, 2000-500 B.C. Indo-European language, burial with drinking vessels, flint, metal Stonehenge III & IV (2000 B.C. -1100 B.C.) Farms, circular huts, oblong fields 1200 B.C. Celtic inhabitants arrived around 750 B.C., hill forts Iron Age, begins in Europe around 8th century B.C, in England around 500 or 600 B.C. Population growth Celtic people in England: Britons (hence Britannia) (some Celtic tribes: Atrebates, Belgae, Brigantes, Catuvellauni, Dumnonii, Ordovices, Silures) Celtic languages: Gaelic, Brythonic (Britannic) Further Celtic (Belgian Gaul) migrations, coins, potter's wheel, practice of cremation c. 100 B.C. Roman Britain Julius Caesar invades Britain, 55/54 BC 43/50 A.D., Roman Emperor Claudius, Roman conquest; Romanization/Christianization, Latin conquest of southern and midland peoples completed, 78-85 A.D., Roman Governor Agricola Roman historian Tacitus, author of Germania (98 A.D.), description of life of Germanic tribes, concept of comitatus Hadrian's Wall (73 miles long), 121-127 A.D. Fortification against Picts and Scots Germanic tribes (Ostrogoths, Visigoths, Franks, Burgundians, Vandals, Lombards, etc.), migrations throughout Europe and raids against Rome (Visigoths sacked Rome in 410 A.D.) Roman departure from Britain 410 AD Anglo-Saxon Invasions (map: very large, large, small) Britain besieged by Picts, Scots, and Saxons British leader Vortigern invites Saxons (Angles, Saxons, Jutes) into alliance against Picts and Scots; Jute leaders Hengest and Horsa, Jute settlements in Thanet, Kent, and Isle of Wight Saxons rebel against Britons 442 Large-scale Germanic invasions (Angles, Saxons, Jutes), 449 Saxon settlements in Sussex and Wessex, 477- 495 British Celts driven into Wales, Cornwall, Ireland, and Brittany (on northwest coast of France) British resistance, King Arthur, British victory at Mt. Badon, A.D. 500 Gildas, De Excidio Britanniae (The Fall of Britain) (c. A.D. 540) , a Latin work describing and lamenting the fall of Britain to the Anglo-Saxons. Anglo-Saxons in control by sixth century Anglo-Saxon England (map: very large, large, small ) Angles' settlements in East Anglia, the Midlands, and Northumbria; term "Anglo-Saxons": originally Saxons in England (as opposed to continental Saxons); Angles > English, Angle-lond > Engla-lond > England ("land of the Angles") Anglo-Saxon Heptarchy: Northumberland, East Anglia, Mercia (Angles), Kent (Jutes), Essex, Sussex, Wessex (Saxons); seventh century Northumbrian dominance, eighth century Mercian dominance, ninth/tenth century West Saxon dominance Pope Gregory sends St. Augustine (the "Apostle of the English," a Roman Benedictine monk, NOT the more famous St. Augustine who lived 354-430 A.D.) to Kent A.D. 597 Aethelbert I of Kent (Jutes), converted to Christianity by Augustine, first Christian king of Anglo-Saxon England (Rex Anglorum), also compiled law code (c. 600) (definitions and rules of kinship, wergild, slaves and freemen/ceorl, nobles) Gradual Christianization of Anglo-Saxons by Roman and Irish missionaries (St. Aidan and others, 635-655); coexistence of Christian and pagan beliefs, Wyrd and Providence Persistence of pagan customs, cenotaph of East-Anglian Raedwald at Sutton Hoo, 625 A.D. Caedmon, oldest poetic vernacular work ("Hymn of Creation", c. 670), monastery at Whitby; also one of the earliest works, Widsith (c. 650-700), a poem in which a poet named Widsith recounts his own experiences as a wandering minstrel Lindisfarne Gospels, 698, Latin Vulgate text with interlined Old English paraphrase Venerable Bede (673-735), Historia Ecclesiastica Gentis Anglorum (Ecclesiastical History of the English People) (731), Latin work; Ruthwell Cross (early 8th c); origins of Beowulf? Offa, king of Mercia (r. 757-796); Alcuin of York (732-804), high level of scholarship first Viking attacks 787, sack of Lindisfarne Priory 793; Book of Kells: Irish illuminated manuscript of four gospels (8th c.) West Saxon King Egbert (r. 802-839), defeats Mercian king Beornwulf at Battle of Ellendune (825); conquered Mercia (829); lost Mercia to Wiglaf (830-831) Cynewulf (c. first half of 9th c.), author of Juliana, Elene, Fates of the Apostles, Christ King Alfred (849-899), king of Wessex (r. 871-899), victories over Vikings at Ashdown 871, Edington 878, Treaty of Wedmore 878, Danish king Guthrum forced to accept Christianity and retreat to Danelaw; 886 Alfred captures London and is recognized as king of all England (except for Danish parts) King Alfred's employment of Mercian scholars (Plegmund, Waerferth, Aethelstan, and Werwulf) in educational and literary endeavors (885), revival of learning, beginnings of Anglo Saxon Chronicle West Saxon dialect became literary standard of Old English literature; oral tradition second half of tenth century: Dunstan, Ethelwold, Oswald, monastic reform, copying of manuscripts Battle of Brunanburh 937, English army under Aethelstan defeated army of Northmen, Scots, and Welsh allies; poem Battle of Brunanburh recorded in the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle late 10th and early 11th century, renewed Scandinavian invasions, led by Norwegian Olaf Tryggvason and Danish king Svein Aethelred II Unraed (r. 978-1016); married to Emma (daughter of Richard II, duke of Normandy); peak of monastic and literary revival: Aelfric (955-1020), Catholic Homilies, Lives of the Saints; Wulfstan d. 1023, Sermo Lupi ad Anglos (1014, "Sermon of the Wolf to the English People") (in Old English with Latin introductory words). Exeter Book (c. 1000) manuscript containing the Wanderer and the Seafarer, Widsith, The Wife's Lament, Guthlac, Juliana, Christ, The Ruin. Junius Manuscript (c. 1000), containing the Old English Genesis, Exodus, Daniel, and Christ and Satan Vercelli Book (c. 1000), manuscript containing Dream of the Rood, Andreas, Elene, Fates of the Apostles. Battle of Maldon 991; poem Battle of Maldon recorded in manuscript Cotton Otho (destroyed by fire in 1731), currently known version comes from transcript made in 1724 by John Elphinstone Cotton Vitellius (c. 1000), manuscript containing Beowulf, Judith, partially destroyed by fire in 1731 Danish Canute (Cnut), king of England (r. 1016-1035), married Aethelred's widow Emma and fathered Hardecanute, king of England (1040-1042) Edward the Confessor (last Anglo-Saxon king) (r. 1042-1066), son of Aethelred II Unraed and Emma; lived in exile in Normandy, during Danish rule of England, until 1041; conflicts and power sharing with Godwine, earl of Wessex, and his son Harold Norman invasion;William the Conqueror, Battle of Hastings 1066, end of Anglo-Saxon Period

No need to be offensive. (ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa - sorry)

Jude, you left out the part where the aliens from outer space landed....when was that? I thought Stonehenge was an alien landing zone.

Yeah, Roswald...that's the place. What state was that?