Now For A Topic That REALLY Matters ...

Yes... I think Harold Shipman hung himself because he didnt have the Aussie Miracle Hair Insurance for weak and distressed hair... i mean, have you *seen* his beard? I bought some yesterday, and my mop of startled hair is now swinging like a hair advert curtain of silk....

Beyond a shadow of a doubt, it must be the classic D&G Old Jamaica Ginger Beer. Simple, spicy, lovely nicey.

Muji's facial moisturiser...... [%sig%]

I must say fishy, that I find the use of this subject matter in a humorous way to be in very poor taste, and extremely insensitive. Hair products that is, not Shipman. [%sig%]

I would just like to state that as someone who cannot stand mayonnaise, the Boots Chinese Chicken, Jalfrezi Chicken and Thai Chicken sandwich three pack was a godsend, so of course in the new relaunch they have got rid of this, replacing Jalfrezi Chicken with coronation chicken, which is wet. I mislike wetness in a sandwich, it makes me shudder. Why can't folk leave well alone? And what is with the lunatics at M&S who trumpet their "No Mayonnaise" range and replace the mayonnaise with creme fraiche, or sour cream, having no understanding of the reasons WHY us non-mayo people can't stand it. On the plus side, roast beef monster munch are turning up in shops again...

Mayonnaise very good for the hair...

.... yes ... mayo conditioner with a spritzing rinse of refreshing vinegar ... that's what i use ... i am really shocked to hear about the boots sandwich fiasco andrew ... now if anyone has any good mascara advice i would really like to have it ...

oooh, i have good mascara advice.. for two years i have used the bourjois coup de theatre, and it is VERY good... you put on a base of white stuff from one end, which has fibres in it for thickening and legnthening, and then you cover with the black side (dont forget, or you look like a russian left out in the steppes for a week)

Buffalo sauce in the Discovery range of sauces (I've bought it at Sainsbury and Tesco) is wonderfully sublime when cooked with chicken and stuff - the ultimate meal experience. Highly addictive. You'll never taste anything better. You won't want to eat anything else.

Tesco's Value range sparkling water (19p for 2ltr)... decant into Perrier bottles and who can tell the difference?

The above is best eaten with rice.

Bassett's hard tack liquorice - there's no beating it.

Vaseline Clinique mascara Rimmel eye-liner That's me sorted in the boat and race department... As for food: Patak's curry pastes M & S Calamari rings Walker's Sweet Thai crisps

I can also recommend those male enlargement offers (choosing my words carefully here) they keep emailing you about over the internet. I invested in one and I kid you not it led to a DOUBLING of size. 49 dollars is a lot of money but worth it for that extra inch.

sorta related.... what is Pele doing on that erection problem ad?

No mayo in sandwiches?!! I'm the opposite of Andrew. I can't abide dry food/sandwiches. It needs a sauce or a gravy of some kind on it! When I go to Pizza Hut I always nick a bowl of the salad dressings (blue cheese, garlic mayo etc) to put on my already moist pizza. Nobody complains and it makes the crusts etc much nicer to eat. Of course you all know that putting an eyeliner in the fridge/freezer will make it a lot easier to sharpen and give a finer, more accurate line. .. I mean you ALL knew that, right? As for Harold Shitman: rot in hell you evil little turd.

Sharwood's Mango Chutney Buttoni's proper longggggg spaghettttttttti - hate the 4 inch strands they do now Jacob's Fig rolls - and actually Fig Jam from anywhere!! I've never seen it since I left Liverpool???? and can I propose a 'Get Mayo Out' campaign pleeeeze on behalf of the dry ones - it's blended vomit as far as I'm concerned.

My own home made garlic mayonnaise (aioli to you) if just wonderful. At this rate I'll end up selling it door to door.