Sorry to disappoint but 'fraid not! I did tell the BF about it though when I went back down to join the party in the garden- he thought it was hilarious!
Oh God, I think I've done most of these. I asked my oldest mate's wife when the baby was due at my sister's wedding - and she wasn't pregnant. I've been locked out and naked (only had to run three hundred yards round the back to get in. Saw three people I knew on the way. No sweat really). I've been arse over tit (in Waitrose though) and sat on my sister's new table tennis table and smashed it to smithereens.
I've pinched the arse of a woman in Exeter High Street I thought I knew but when she turned round I'd never seen her before in my life. She smacked me in the face. 'I'm terribly sorry, I thought you were someone else' - just doesn't play well in the circumstances. The woman I thought it was always pinched my bum when we met and I just thought I'd get my retaliation in first. I was standing for Parliament at the time.
Oh no ... there are just so many...
LOL - loved the bum pinching anecdote! Keep going Tony - I am sure there must be more to come! would you not add having to wear your fluffy space suit in the ice bar as one - if only there were photographic evidence of this!
you know something folks ... that beastly liana has made us all confess ... she has alluded to a fat file of embarrassing moments ... she has threatened to flourish ... and what have we seen? ... NOTHING ...
ok ... this one wasn't embarrassing for me ... but i told rachel about it yesterday and she nearly burst her banks so i thought i would add it in ...
i was on a camper van holiday in france with some people ( i shan't name names to protect the innocent) about 20 years or so ago ... one of the party was suffering anxiety about being locked up in a camper van with the rest of us and as a result was very constipated .... those french bogs can be a bit offputting if you are delicate in the botty department (this will not apply to you, ely) ...
anyway after not being able to go for days she was desperate and i found a nice bar with very pleasant toilets and took her for a walk down to the bar - urging her to relax her bowels as she walked along ... the relaxation worked and by the time we got to the bar she was busting to go (tortoises head as we call it) ...
i pointed out the bogs to her (a row of three doors) and ordered the coffees and waited ... and waited ... and waited ... feeling a little worried i decided to go and look for her ....
she wasnt in the ladies ... i checked the mens and she wasnt in there either ... feeling very worried by then i decided to open the third door...
there she was ... inside a small broom cupboard with an enormous bulge in the rear of her pants and her knuckles stuffed in her mouth ...
she was mortified and dare not come out in case someone saw her ...
i am afraid i laughed until i was nearly sick ...
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