backhanded love songs

A backhanded compliment, is a compliment with an insulting undertone. A forehanded insult, is an insult with a complimentary undertone. Thass whaddi'm talkin' bout baby.

OK I'll let you have that one.

How about 'take a look at my girlfriend... not much of a girlfriend, but she's the only one I've got' - Supertramp. If there was ever damning with faint praise. But then, I do think that these backhanded lines in Pet Shop Boys "Heart" are very true and still romantic, yet realistic. "If I didn't love you, I would look around for someone else. But every time I see you, it has the same effect. My heart starts missing a beat, every time" Almost the whole of Sinatra's Love is the Tender Trap is a backhanded love song, about how easily women can snare your heart and you find yourself in love before you know it. Witchcraft is similar - praising the woman to the skies but simultaneously pleading that she has made him fall in love, a state to be avoided if possible.

Specifically "Cos there's no nicer witch than you..." And I always felt sorry for Marc Bolan's friend Deborah. I don't know a woman alive that would be flattered by "Oh, oh Deborah, you look like a zeb-or-ah" (So that's a stripey horse then) Likewise for "She moves so fine, like a flamingo / I'll make her mine, pretty flamingo" (so, sort of tottering on far too skinny legs and with a big nose and prediliction for vivid pink...) And on one of the most romantic love songs ever, I don't think I know any real people that wouldn't be utterly spooked in a Hitchcock way if 'birds suddenly appear, every time, you are near'

OK do an example of a forehanded insult. I've never heard of that.

The One I Love - REM. This one goes out to the one I love This one goes out to the one I left behind a simple prop to occupy my time This one goes out to the one I love Most backhanded EVER. And as for conditional songs, what about Lean On Me, Bill Withers. Basically he's saying, I'll help you out PROVIDED you're prepared to put in exactly the same donkey work when I'M in need. Great artist, Bill, tho. Grandma's Hands. Mmmmm.

"I love your new haircut.. it really suits you. I bet it looks great when its brushed" My Mum, June 2003

Hmm, but when you listen to Lady is a tramp, he is praising the woman to the skies for being a free, real person instead of a stuck-up bitch just because she has money. Do agree that 'honey, I think of you as a tramp' is not the deal-clinching line I'd ever use.

Your Mum sung that to you? Is it on Cd?

Havent you heard of that band? Flash, you are so behind the times. Do put that Queen cd away and get with it.

Freda Sadly, I do get what Grec is saying. Ol blue eyes is calling the woman a tramp affectionately. I was called an insane weirdo the other day by someone who then said they liked me a lot.

The most back handed love lyric in the world is in Thunder Road by Bruce Spingsteen "...You ain't a beauty, but hey you're all right Oh and that's all right with me." Brilliant. You might not be that pretty, but you'll do. I never thought that I could feel such a princess...

I agree. Isn't the whole point of the song Frank saying what a cracking lass she is, and the line "That's why the lady is a tramp" is a snipe at all the bitter, jealous society bitches who put her down? So rather than a backhanded compliment, it's more a forehanded insult. Or something.

A few dodgy one's here You're The Top (Verse 1) At words poetic, I'm so pathetic That I always have found it best, Instead of getting 'em off my chest, To let 'em rest unexpressed. I hate parading my serenading As I'll probably miss a bar, But if this ditty is not so pretty, At least it'll tell you how great you are. (chorus 1) You're the top! You're the Colosseum, You're the top! You're the Louvre Museum, You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss, You're a Bendel bonnet, a Shakespeare sonnet, You're Mickey Mouse. You're the Nile, You're the Tow'r of Pisa, You're the smile on the Mona Lisa. I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop, But if, Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top[! (verse 2) Your words poetic are not pathetic On the other hand, boy, you shine And I can feel after every line A thrill divine down my spine. Now gifted humans like Vincent Youmans Might think that your song is bad, But for a person who's just rehearsin' Well I gotta say this my lad: (chorus 2) You're the top! You're Mahatma Ghandi. You're the top! You're Napolean brandy. You're the purple light of a summer night in Spain, You're the National Gall'ry, You're Garbo's sal'ry, You're cellophane. You're sublime, You're a turkey dinner. You're the time of the Derby winner. I'm a toy balloon that is fated soon to pop. But if, Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top! (chorus 3) You're the top! You're a Ritz hot toddy. You're the top! You're a Brewster body. You're the boats that glide on the sleepy Zuider Zee, You're a Nathan Panning, You're Bishop Manning, You're broccoli. You're a prize, You're a night at Coney, You're the eyes of Irene Bordoni, I'm a broken doll, a fol-de-rol, a blop, But if, Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top. (chorus 4) You're the top! You're an Arrow collar. You're the top! You're a Coolidge dollar. You're the nimble tread of the feet of Fred Astaire, You're an O'Neill drama, You're Whistler's mama, You're Camembert. You're a rose, You're Inferno's Dante, You're the nose of the great Durante. I'm just in the way, as the French would say "De trop," But if, Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top. (chorus 5) You're the top! You're a Waldorf salad. You're the top! You're a Berlin ballad. You're a baby grand of a lady and a gent. You're an old dutch master, You're Mrs. Aster, You're Pepsodent. You're romance, You're the steppes of Russia, You're the pants on a Roxy usher. I'm a lazy lout that's just about to stop, But if Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top! (chorus 6) You're the top! You're a dance in Bali. You're the top! You're a hot tamale. You're an angel, you simply too, too, too diveen, You're a Botticelli, You're Keats, You're Shelley, You're Ovaltine. You're a boon, You're the dam at Boulder, You're the moon over Mae West's shoulder. I'm a nominee of the G.O.P. or GOP, But if, Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top! (chorus 7) You're the top! You're the Tower of Babel. You're the top! You're the Whitney Stable. By the River Rhine, You're a sturdy stein of beer, You're a dress from Saks's, You're next year's taxes,' You're stratosphere. You're my thoist, You're a Drumstick Lipstick, You're da foist in da Irish svipstick, I'm a frightened frog that can find no log to hop, But if, Baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top!

and how about Meat loaf, ".I like you, i need you, there aint no way I'm ever gonna love you, but don't feel bad..." Oh no that wouldn't make me feel bad at all.

"I'm not in love so don't forget it. it's just a silly phase Im going through" 10cc Classic

Love your song title! I'd buy it. Can't think of any song examples, but how about Shakespeare's 'My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun.....if hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head...'etc ?

mm, but the lyrics are just silly people being, well... silly... or just plain mean. Shakespeare was saying that his mistress wasn't the most beautiful woman in the world, and she was imperfect, but he's still have rabid monkey sex... ahem... he still loved her the most. Or so my English teacher claims.

I love the hitchcock reference, I never thought of Burt Bach....(Damn can't spell it, you know the one), like that. And in line with Zeb-or-ah's how about " I really love your tiger feet"? Well ok, so I am a freak with the feet of a large cat, but hey Barc Bolan likes them. Whew.

Whats the old funny valentines song? Ella Fitzgerald is it? Found it... My funny Valentine Sweet comic Valentine You make me smile with my heart Your looks are laughable Unphotographable Yet you're my favourite work of art Is your figure less than Greek Is your mouth a little weak When you open it to speak Are you smart? But don't change a hair for me Not if you care for me Stay little Valentine stay Each day is Valentine's day Hmm.

I think Shakespeare was saying his mistress was a man ! Basically most songs are part of some conspiracy to make us feel crap and useless if single. The ones with blatant sexual lyrics are probably more wholesome.

...something along the lines of 'let's do it in the road' ??

Dean Martin's "Ain't that a kick in the head" Frank Sinatra's "The Lady is a Tramp"

I think you're right Freda - Shakespeare's sonnets are believed to have been written to a boy.

Well what about Chaucer - he was excellent at back-handed compliments about certain pilgrims in the Cantebury Tales.

oh lordy from meatloaf to chaucer in 9 easy stages, via shakespeare's boyfriend. If this is what happens when you get people together on the basis of one common interest I might join AA too. Or the masons, except I think their common interest might exclude me, not having one rolled up trouser leg.

Or even try Alexander Pope - the sharpest, wittiest, cattiest poet of all time (in the UK). He came up with 'damning with faint praise' - and that's what all these backhanded love songs are about.

"I want a girl, just like the girl, who married dear old Dad."

Liana: your mum's words constitute a backhanded compliment...a compliment, balanced off with an insult (as if as an afterthought, but really that's what she meant in the 1st place). *shakes head* God, at least Sab is starting to get me. The classic forehanded insult might be epitomized by the eighties Kit Kat advert, whereby a man, a record producer of some sort, or maybe an a 'n' r man, says to a young, hopeful band, "You can't sing; you can't dance; you LOOK awful... ...you'll go a long way!" NOW do you get me. Sheesh.

Paul - have you ever heard of errorless learning?

QUEEN!!! really what an insult, i'm a hip daddy and don't you forget it. *Takes out Steps cd and pops in S-Club juniour cd*

A forehanded insult. What are you talking about? It is a backhanded compliment. He loves her, but is saying it in a cackhanded way as most men do

If incest was legal I wouldn't need you because my mum's a good cook too!

For the record, those are actual lyrics to a real song. I didn't make them up. I personally wouldn't want to be anywhere near someone like my mother.

I'd quite like it if Shakespeare wrote that to a bloke... just, y'know, a nice thought. "my bloody valentine" by... some random punkish band.