I just commited fraud...

16 posts / 0 new

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Tue, 2003-05-13 13:58

Oops. I was in my bank getting some cash off my credit card since I lost my debit card last week. (You will note that throughout this story there are many losses, mishaps and general clumsinesses... yes, this is my life.) I was able to get some money but the cashier informed me that my card was damaged so I ought to get a new one.

Flashback to this morning - I lurch hazily across my room; a strange cracking sound from my jeans strewn on the floor. The credit card is cracked across the middle.

I get my cash and sit down at one of the bank phones to ring for a new card. I am put on hold, Vivaldi, four seasons, by the third loop I give up and decide I might as well report my card lost or stolen; it'll be quicker. So I ring the lost/stolen people and they ask me some questions. When did you lose it? I dunno, i'll make something up... "last night, in a pub." My brain slowly ticks over.

So if I lost it last night and yet took money out today then... then... I have just commited fraud by pretending to be the thief of my own card. Very poorly executed fraud considering I did it all from the same branch. S*it. I phoned them up again to confess my guilt, but they seemed unconcerned, "oh I'm not really sure..." (again on hold, the four seasons... grr) "...we'll send you a letter." What? What? send me a letter? Telling me I'm going to jail... ah. Just thought I'd get that off my chest.

Some of you will stand up for me in court won't you?

Please! I'll five star every piece you have...

Not really sure where the 'general discussion' comes into it but hey...

Anybody else commited accidental crimes? Murder? Arson?
Please...

Wed, 2003-05-14 13:52

Spack

How rock 'n roll. I am going to see the bank people now to give myself up... I can't take the guilt.

Wed, 2003-05-14 18:06

Spack

Just spoke to HSBC, apparently before they even investigate dubious withdrawals (sounds like banking to me!) they will send me lots of letters asking whether I took the money out... thus giving me plenty of time to confess before the army's of flying, SARS carrying, ninja monkeys from Hong Kong and Shanghai descend upon Norwich. Phew.

Wed, 2003-05-14 18:55

Rokkitnite

I think you made those monkeys up, fraud-boy.

Tue, 2003-05-13 14:16

ely whitley

Nightmare. One moment of being put on the spot and you're Britain's most wanted. It seems to me that this discussion should be about the trouble we get into with badly thought through white lies. Those seemingly convenient porkies that we never expect to be examined and that leave us looking like fools, or turn us into massive liars on a grand scale to avoid admitting we made the first bit up.

Tue, 2003-05-13 15:36

Tony Cook

Harold - Ely is nothing of the sort - and his post is nothing of the sort. You have a serious hang-up on bullying and I understand this but you cannot take this on to harrass our users. Behave, please. This is not discrimination against you or your views but just common sense.

Tue, 2003-05-13 16:11

Hen

You'll have to become a vagabond, Spack!

Tue, 2003-05-13 16:32

ely whitley

Harold, or whoever you are. My comments were sarcastic not abusive or bullying in any form. If you think they are then you have a misunderstanding of what bullying is and the general sweeping statements that you litter your comments with are far more insulting than anything I've written on here. Stop it. You're acting like a child and belittling with your dilution of a serious issue those that do suffer. Having read your previous threads it seems you are a petty and weak minded individual, here to stir things up and generally act like a wounded dog if someone so much as replys to one of your threads. I consider you a troll, a fool and a pain in the @!#$ and all in such a short space of time. I wasn't aware of your existence yesterday and I'd ratyher things were kept that way. This is the end of it. There will be no more communications from me to you after this.

Tue, 2003-05-13 17:01

Spack

It's not often I open a thread in 'general discussions' and now it's been hi-jacked by Harold. I feel bullied. This is my last post. Full stop. Ahh, here comes the recriminations...

Tue, 2003-05-13 17:02

#10

Spack

Full full stop.

Tue, 2003-05-13 22:07

#11

Edie

Shut the f.uck up for christs sake! The people on these forums are decent tolerant folks, but you are pushing the limits. Push off instead. Yes yes, Im a bully, whatever you like.

Tue, 2003-05-13 22:19

#12

mississippi

Harold, you are the bully here. You deliberately incite people and when they answer you you get abusive. I'm normally a well-behaved, kind, considerate and understanding man but you have stretched my patience to the limit. Now why don't you be a nice little retard and go play on a motorway?

Tue, 2003-05-13 22:49

#13

Elf

Harold PLEASE STOP! You have been asked to chill out. Please don't make me use my trump card. I understand you feel strongly about bullying, hell I've been there a few times myself not so long ago, but hi-jacking threads and sending the discussion towards this topic is not considered nice. If you want to "debate" this subject please keep it to one thread.. Elfyn (The very tired Sys Admin)

Wed, 2003-05-14 00:04

#14

mississippi

You have a special card for fa.rting Pixie?

Wed, 2003-05-14 00:24

#15

petrel bomb

see new heading apart from that, can't see why everyone is bothering to reply to his posts. You see, Harold is a kind of real troll, the kind who - upon his own admission - posts on several boards, unlike the users of this forum who go anon when it suits them. Although he isn't out to 'get' anyone in particular, he is posting for reaction and, no doubt, hoping for a flame war to start. In the case of this forum he initially received some well meaning replies which he chose, either deliberately or due to his communication/paranoia problems, to see as posts 'against' him and launched the flame war himself. Just ignore him. He'll soon troll off elsewhere. hmm just thought about that ... I would be 'for' thread deletion(s) elf/muss, if someone posted the shitt out of the place thus knocking a load of threads off the page. Another good reason for initiating latest to the top, something requested many, many times. It can't be that hard to do can it? Like, one or two lines of HTML? Sheesh!

Wed, 2003-05-14 01:48

#16

petrel psycho s...

back to the subject ... a few years ago I foolishly succumbed to the charms of a telesales girl and took up her offer of a cellnet mobile on a months trial since it sounded cheaper than my vodaphone contract. my wife used it for the month and it clearly was not cheaper. Meanwhile they sent me a second phone and took a direct debit on my bank account based on the details of the first phone - if that makes sense. I complained. I complained again. and again etc. I stoped both DD's and then started to receive solicitors letters bullying me (get the link?) into paying. A quick check revealed that the solicitors were 'in house BT cellnet'. I wrote back. I received more letters, only more threatening than before. I wrote back, accused them of fraudulent selling and informed them that my hourly rate in dealing with their petty claim far outweighed the cost of the calls we had made (we had used both phones extensively by now) and said I would take legal action against them. I received an apology together with a request to send the phones back in the bag they would send later. Not exactly fraud but I did get £150 of calls (including rental) for free. Cellnet/BT/O2 are a shamble and should be avoided at all non costs. I never did send the phones back but did stop using them. A few weeks later I received another phone (a rather fetching Ericsson although I would have preferred an Ulrika) to 'upgrade my cellnet experience'. I didn't send that back either.

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