what job?

About the 'appropriate vids and mags', John. Umm.. well... er... Fire hydrants are called fire hydrants in Britain, Denver, though we don't have those silver painted lumps of cast iron on every street corner that you lot favour. It's usually a connection to the water main in a small box set in the ground, with a yellow sign mounted adjacent displaying a large black letter 'H' and the distance from the sign in feet and inches.

Yes. It was a very stimulating handjob, missi. Umm.. I mean Job..

appropriate mags were "New Scientist" and "Particle acceleration today" videos were National Geographics.

Quit right Jude. Did anyone think otherwise?

Bob Roberts kid not yourself you are voting Labour. It may say that on the ballot sheet, but you and all your pro war chummy chums are voting TORY. New Labour is just a more George-Bush-bottom-licking version of the Tories.

I work in a call centre and i've just been given the dubious promotion of working as a salesman for the company iteself rather than for its clients. Would really, really, really love a job i like.......

Hi Jude, I grew up in Weymouth, I hope you love it as much as I do ( although I've moved away now). As for my job.... I'm a prison officer, and no, it's not like bad girls!

Bunter - everyone says it's great (weymouth) and I'm looking forward to it? What fun things are there to do there?

I started out as an electrician-hated it. Took up the drums and became professional, even backed a singer who sold 9 million records-hated it. But loved all the groupies trying to rip my clothes off. Didn't fight hard. What is it about young girls throwing themselves at some guy on a stage getting paid peanuts for playing crap? I became a carpenter making kitchens. I took up tennis which is just about as good as sex. Believe me I've tried both. I was about to apply for a grade 1 coaching certificate, then both knees gave out. That did tip me into a deep depression because it meant my carpentry career was over too. So I took up drinking, and only now doing something about stopping. Bloody difficult though. Couldn't possibly consider playing drums again-going into pubs and clubs etc. I'm old and I'm fat and my snare don't rat-tat-tat. So I just mope about the place living - no - existing on benefits. But thank God for those. [%sig%]

Change your name mate, it doesn't do anything for your self respect.

mmm well I'm 29 next week, I've had 4 careers and am currently working on my fifth.... academic, by being 2/3rds of my way through a religious studies and philosophy degree at Kings in London. Mainly I'm just used to the long holidays. I also work part time in a children's nursery (former career #1) so I can eat. George... is there anything you CAN'T do? And you didn't mention photography.

I raise underfed (hence slightly built) grubs which I repetatively post to Archer Girl and she sells on to local fishermen.

No really Mykle... I hadn't noticed. But whats your REAL job eh?

Why, Liana, I get to scrutinise health issues for the county council. A mighty interesting job, indeed.

He's taking a while to answer

I worked straight out of school, studied for cips and became a buyer on the good advice of my step-dad. I'm a musician at heart and always have been, I've just been made redundant and intend on remaining a musician 'til my dying day. It's taken me ten years to realise that I can live happily on peanuts as long as I'm doing what I love. Such a simple philosophy but always one which had to contend with pessimism and "whilst you're living under our roof," from the folks. I told them last week what I intend on doing my mum chirped, "you always were into that music, tut." lol

I'm sure I've been through this before but I'm not really a 'carpenter' though I have done some and still do when I can't avoid it. The only job I was ever formally trained for was blacksmith, a job I did for several years before joining the merchant navy, in which I was a PO mechanic. Since then I've worked as a farm hand, welder, docker, plumber, sheet metal worker, hod carrier, tiler, carpenter, demolition worker, shop worker and more recently as a kitchen and bathroom fitter. I also spent some time in my youth studying Stanislavsky method acting at Southend Drama Workshop. I am now retired and retarded.

Exactly, I am a unix c++ programmer, I work testing microprocessor designs before they are built (making chips is ludicrously expensive and it is best to get it right first time). I'm bored with it, and am looking for something else.

Office. Public Service. Mostly compliance stuff & management information. I don't have to wear a tie.

I work as a vodafone customer care advisor. I love my job. I get to talk to lots of different people. Fills me with feelings of deep inner peace. I really feel like I am part of something wonderful. I can't wait to do my next shift.

I manage a statistical data archive for a huge pharmaceutical company and i loathe it. i don't loathe the lifestyle that the money brings. but i loathe the work itself. i wish i were a dustman sometimes.

I work for a very large international daily newspaper as a toady. Been doing it for about 24 years now.

I measure things.

and count things. The stress ....

I have studied theology, art history and did a three year professional training course in shiatsu therapy. All great background for being a full time mother.

I work for a world famous book publishing company...as a grunt in one of their distribution warehouses.

I edit other people's nonfiction writing.

I worked for local authorities up until a year or so ago. Still do occasional work for them. Recently I've been working for various different bodies, depending on availability. My most recent work was monitoring the Dewar systems in a ivf Clinic. Which involves....(whate for it).............. 'Checking that the cryo - temperatures stay constant'. I now work in Innovation, Patents and the occasional work for others when I need the money, which is almost all of the time. I'm soon to be fully self employed in Innovation and patents.

So what the hell is 'Innovation'? I notice too that mykle declined to give any info, not surprising for someone who has 'no' face or address.

:o)

I used to be a computer programmer and analyst for a building society, then project manager for a software company till I took redundancy. Now I have my own company ( staff of 1 ) putting video on websites. I love working for myself, and wish I'd done it twenty years earlier. I still don't make as much as when I was employed, but I don't get assessed, reorganised, transferred, evaluated, inspected, or generally shat on. [%sig%]

Depends what you like, there's the standard cinema and ten pin bowling (and other touristy bits!!!!) but loads of gorgeous walks around Weymouth, the surrounding countryside and island of Portland. If you're there soon try and catch a glimpse of the Prison Ship before they sink it!!!!! Of course there's the beach and sea, nature reserve, chesil beach.. - There's loads, it's a beautiful area. Up the coast towards Bridport is Hardy's monument (good walking), Abbotsbury Swannery and tropical gardens (and the old village). Hope that's given you a start!!

Well. At the moment it means sampling. Or Pre-marketing testing. Soon. It will mean. Product illustration. Product Prototyping. CAD Engineering. Patent and Commercialization. And much more, which I'm still in the process of retraining for.

My Name is Mark and I run a creative writing website. Before that, I was extremely unemployed. Before that I went to university for two months out of two years. Before that I was a support worker working with adults with learning difficulties in the community.

Well...um... left school after A levels, went to Uni in Kent - dropped out 2 terms later, moved home, worked as a griddle chef at The Little Chef. Got chucked out of home, moved to London to live with boyfriend, worked for one day in Past Times in Covent Garden. Worked for one day in The Works book shop opposite Camden Tube. Applied for more jobs. Had several illustrations published in magazines. Became full time carer for my ill dad. Got married. he died Started a French degree at Queen Mary and Westfield in London. Mum died. Dropped out after 2 terms. Moved to Colchester with husband who was doing a PhD in Quantum Optics and was a jazz trombonist. Started degree in LIterature...moved out of home with husband...got divorced... Got a first class BA whilst working 3 days a week as a chef in a wine bar. Graduated. Got my first job in magazines - as editorial assistant on Coll..ect it! magazine - underpaid lacky for £10,000 a year. Moved to Slim..mer magazine as Food Editor, for about 8 months. Left to go to UEA to do MA, and worked as editorial co-ordinator on Arts In..dustry magazine part time. Got distinction for MA. Got Christmas job in the Cole...man's mustard museum. Got over 50 rejections for jobs in the Norfolk area. Went back to same company as Sl..immer in Essex and got Deputy Editorship on a new gardening mag. Had to live away from home in week, and travel too expensive. Walked out one lunchtime with a sharp pain in my head and a need to crawl into a corner and weep. Got another 50 rejections for jobs in the Norfolk area. Shit. I shouldn't have responded to this one...

Christ John, you are difficult to tie down. 'Sampling' can mean anything from tasting free bits of pizza in Asda to stealing bits of music and using them in 'new' recordings. WHAT EXACTLY do you do? (I need to know for my files. Mykle is fiked under 'nothing', jasper under cyber terrorist)

As of today, I am officially on maternity leave. I don't know what that makes my job - cake eater I guess. Before that (ie: yesterday) I was freelancing as translator and copywriter and sometime marketing consultant and before that I ran a language training company. Before that I was a Principal of an English language school and before that I was a hairdresser. On balance, I like being a maternity leaver best. The snacks are better and you don't have to share.

Errr....what's 'fiked' mean Sludge? Are you Mykle....ummmm...you know....teapot-ish*wink*?

Yes I knew it would happen that someone would say that, and I wouldn't have had anyone else say it than you Miss Pippi. But it's called black humour. But if I can lose this swollen liver that most people take to be a beer belly, I shall become skinnyalky. [%sig%]

Black humour is only funny when it comes from Lenny Henry. Choose a name you have to live up to, not one you have to live down.

Are you and Mykle

I've been an English teacher since September which basically entails having a headache most of the time. Don't listen to the tv ads - it's awful, unless you're in a posh school I suppose. Best jobs I ever had were being a basic skills tutor - classes of five, all kids that hadn't done well in school so were now panicking and eager to learn - and writing lonely hearts ads (well audio typing them). Both jobs were great. Both paid absolute peanuts. Seems to be the way it goes...

I picked my toes iin Pokipsy once.

OK missi, for your files. Last post, = Lab assistant or 'Lab Jockey', as I like to call it. Normally bio- Physics in nature. Which is very boring and mainly involves recording data and ticking little boxes on stupid forms. I use to get so excited when one of the alarms on the cryo units went of, especially if I was working nights. Because I got to drag some stuck up embryologist out of bead at 2 in the morning. Well! I couldn't let all those little spermatozoa denature, now, could I! Now. I work for my self, In a similar area as the later, but far less boring and no ticking little bloody boxes. Well. There is 'some' box ticking involved. If I don't make some money soon. You will find me traipsing up and down the motorway holding up a large sign saying. "Scientist needs work.... Me love you long time" *Christ. I hope it don't come to that again*

I used to do nothing, George, but I've lapsed.

So John...lets get this right...you were a frozen sperm monitor?

you need to play down your command of English if you want employment in Norfolk

Yup.

'e's roight oirish

10 or so years working for housing associations, currently freelance, doing agency jobs for a variety of housing associations in east/north london - managing property, dealing with anti social behaviour and the like.... currently trying to deal with 2 warring neighbours who share a garden, they want it divided so that neither of them can go in the other's half, i have to go there with the contractor and ensure that he can lay a path that divides it and referee the neighbours when they conplain that she's getting more than me, that path should be 6 inches to the left or to the right.... the exciting world of social housing