annoying ads

Why is Missi in that Volvic drinking water ad?

The most annoying ads are for things I can't afford to buy.

Wasn't she a 'Liver Bird' about three decades ago? I hate that ad with the syrup-slurping toucans.

I quite like the big dollop guy, but I hate that Lea and Perrins table sauce guy.

Any advert to do with insurance is rubbish isn't it. They are so tight they can't be bothered to spend their hard earned cash on a decent ad. I like ads that take the piss out of themselves. Even then though, they are still trying to manipulate our brains and I hate that. You can't do anything or go anywhere without having people trying to get into your head these days. Any one watch that programme about hypnotism last night? Scary.

The Tesco car Insurance ads where they have really well known actors playing supermarket trolleys, the whole premise is dire!! It just doesn,t work.

Fools? No fergie, it was obviously an old bull, haven't you heard of OMB's?

agree 100% with Rachel and add the Orange ads before every movie you see in the UGC cinema, I will never buy Orange, never...even if I get to see Hugh Jackman get his kit off afterwards:-) - which incidentally is he only thing worth going to see Van Helsing for....or the line Dracula: "Igor, why are you tormenting that creature?" Igor - "It's what I do" come to think of it there were a lot of funny lines in it as well as Hugh's lovely bod...but too long and too bizarre.

McDonalds...fly Mcflurry ads!!!! oh and mum I want a rabbit, mum I want a rabbit, mum I want a rabbit Argh give me a bloody shotgun!!

I've just seen one for Elvive with 'nutrillium' that makes hair FOUR TIMES SMOOTHER! Where do you start with smoothness that gives you a calculable figure that you can then mulitply by 4? BASTARDS!

At certain times on the weekends, CNBC plays infomercials in German. The worst are the one's selling leg hair removal cream using rather elderly women with very hairy legs as models. The product is industrial strength, that much we know. :))

i'm afraid it's the new el paso fajitas ad, where the dowdy lower middle class and snotty upper class parents of newly weds bond over a magical meal of el paso fajitas.

Rachel sorry to disagee on the Esure one as I love it makes me laugh every time, maybe it got something to do with living in a small world or even little things please little minds. Martina I was only saying yesterday to my recently aquired lovely cleaner that I haven't been able to think straight lately as something or someone seems to be messing with my head and not being used to it I don't like it very much. I noted the hypnotism programme was on wanted to watch it but in the end gave it a miss, now after what you said I'm glad I did as being elderly and living alone being scared is the last thing thats needed especially before bed time. There are lots of ads I don't! like but can't think of them till they come up on the screen then, I either scream and shout like some loony or go to the kitchen get a large drink of ice water from the fridge to cool me down, may not work for everyone but works for me...

that el paso one where the bloke cooks some fajitas while his bird slags him off to someone on the end of the phone. he should plonk the lot on her head and go back to Footballer's Wifes where he belongs. Stupid cow.

Nutrillium! I just love how they conjure up what sounds like a newly-discovered element whose major properties just happen to be cosmetic. The advertising industry obviously reckons that most women never made it through to GCSE Chemistry. Still, the nutrillium may just make you pretty enough to merit a place in the passenger seat of an advertising executive's new gadget-riddled car.

Footballers' Wives in fact. Or Footbalers Wives as they call it on't TV

The funny thing about the Esure ad is that there is a massive billboard that you can see when you get the train from Clapham Junction to Waterloo where the really annoying woman has a speech bubble coming out of her mouth saying "Look mum, I'm on a bill board". Makes me smile every time I pass it, for some strange reason. Kath, adverts will do that to you. They are meant to clutter your brain. That's why I avoid them whenever I can. (although my mate Lars is in the new Egg advert and I haven't seen it yet so I have been watching them this past week - anyone seen it. The crazy danish guy pretending to be a gangster apparently)

You've hit the nail on the head there Neil. What empty, shallow lives we all lead when defined by the advertisers.

He sounds like a character in an Andrew Pack novel.

'Haromatic Spysays,' Yes we've mentioned her before Fergie, Andrew Pack knows her.

He is like no-one you have ever come across before, I can assure you.

I feel my life is totally bereft now... as I don't recognise many of the adverts mentioned here... *Resolves to watch more TV* Seriously, though... its ok slagging of advertisers, but they are resolutely not stupid.... if you are discussing their crappy adverts and giving them additional publicity... it means they are now imbeded in your conciousness and they have succeeded.. no?

I've known one or two Scandanavians in my time, including a Danish dwarf. Does he make slow gin and tell you when your toast needs turning over?

How about the current O2 adverts about 'business zones'? (the one about you being able to choose two area codes for cheap calls or something). Not that there is anything particularly annoying about how the advert presents itself, or that there is anything particularly distateful about the company / product it is promoting. But, the adverts do insist on highlighting the codes - '0207' and '0208'.... you would think that a company that is / was an offshoot of BT would know that there is only one area code for London - 020 - and that the 7 or 8 became part of the phone number years ago...

Like the fajitas one, any ad promoting "kits" to make food which is very simple to put together in the first place.

*thinks - Emma has been sniffing glue today*

isn't it supposed to be a dutch gangster? they are playing up on the dutch lottery scam

I dunno, I haven't seen it. Have you? Lars is Danish but has many talents

you haven't seen it? did you know that you are a winner on the dutch lottery, just send me £500.00 to cover administrative charges and a large prize will be yours

Last night I saw the stupidest ad for BT or AOL broadband. Frumpy housefrau explaining how son "used to be terrible at spelling and handwriting but since we've had broadband his homework has improved no end" - yes, because he's cutting and pasting straight from the net. Wish we'd had internet when I was a student

"do we really need to have the natural world cut down to cater to our own weirdo ideas of decency..." I wonder what Fergal makes of Rupert Bear and chums.

I have to look out for it. Last ad he did was the Rimmel one where he got to snog Kate Moss on the end of a pier.

I still don't like the el paso fajitas ad. Or the Typhoo ad when they swap typhoo tea bags for buckets of cold water being thrown at them........i mean why would anyone swap tea bags for a constant drenching. The ad didn't make me want to buy tea bags.......or chicken.

Oh, Rachel, are you Glam or are you Glam? Chalk and Cheese, me and you, but I like you anyway.

Me? Glam? Bollocks. Lars is glam, but I knew him before he was.

Yeah? Some blokes have this unnerving quality of suddenly getting incredibly handsome when they looked proper geeky at school. My step son is a case in point. He's a singer song-writer whose band won the battle of the bands once, though he's not with them any more. He's just moved down your way actually as he's working for KPMG on the Farringdon Road. He used to stay with us every week-end from being about 11. Then he didn't come as often, when he was 16+, every time he came up he'd changed dramatically, it was just amazing to watch. I freak out thinking about hormones in our house, with three boys.

I think the one with the black woman singing and giving away coca cola how dare she? why she giving all the coke away? why god damn it why? Also a advert from a few years back for a product called fibergel "why don't they just call us the fibergel family" it for costapation for god sake.

that teacher one in which everyone does their job without a head. And that baldy tosser at the end who makes a weak hair joke involving a Vandergraff generator to a class of kids who in real life would have told him to fuckoff and applied mains powered electrodes to his ears. I saw that four times tonight during one programme. Did you know that if every maths graduate this year went into teaching there would still be a shortage of maths teachers?

I can't stand that 'hands that do dishes' one.

Colin.. The Coke lady is handing out Coke laced with Cocaine and ricine.. thats why its free and it also improves the taste, the after effects are like drinking too much castlemane XXXX .. you'll soon find out what the four X's are covering... (as in a swear word) lol.. And Ive been on fibregel.. it doesnt work and it tastes like what is supposed to come out when it does work... (honest..) Steve.. Lancashire [%sig%]

Got to be Michael Winner and Esure - most annoying extra "I'm on the telly, Mum"

Actually, the HSBC ads about - we know loads of stuff about overseas traditions. Yeah? And I could care how much? What are you expecting me to do about it, now that I have this information that has absolutely no bearing on how I run my current account? Still, at least with them, I know my bank charges aren't going into Samuel L Jackson's pockets...

On the contrary best ads ever... My nomination was the Mr Kipling /Nativity play one which was quickly withdrawn after complaints by Christians without a sense of humour

For me, the most annoying ads ever, are the Halifax 'singing bank manager' ads. Even worse is their animated ad, where a character declares [in a badly-executed, faux-Brummie accent]: 'I was thinking about the future of credit cards'. If I see one more all-singing, all-dancing bank manager on my TV screen, I think I'll puke! [%sig%]

The ones that get me are the skin-care ads 'Look and feel ten years younger' they say whilst employing the winsome charms of a fourteen year old to induce you to buy and slap it on like it's going out of fashion. So by my reckoning this fourteen year old, having used said creams, will revert to eating mashed banana, having tantrums and suddenly become fixated on Bear In The Big Blue House...

anything that makes up nonsense science and incalculable statistics "boswellox" well I think they're admitting in their own way there "up to 84% healthier hair" you can't measure hair health to that level "two thirds shinier than normal hair " again, shininess is beyond those kind of figures Also, and I've said this before, when they say: "Can help reduce cholesterol" (replace cholesterol with heart disease, piles, wrinkles etc etc) I don't want "CAN HELP reduce cholesterol" I want, at least" CAN reduce cholesterol", or "HELPS reduce cholesterol", ideally I'd prefer, "reduces cholesterol" but the off chance that it might assist in my cholesterol reduction is just too vague, peeling bananas CAN probably HELP reduce cholesterol as can anything else conceivably. just how dumb do these twats think we are?

Surely a disgusting poster ad going around for "McFlurry"; a pair of luscious red female lips sucking a large flat piece of chocolate and the resultant saliva dripping into a tub of "McFlurry"; I couldn't believe this one! I mean, I'm not a prude and I realise that mutual exchanges of oral fluids do occur during osculatory sessions but not into my ice-cream, please!

The new Fanta ads affect me badly - some acne ridden, puberty-newbie skater-boy is digging about in a fridge in a tatty little shop, having improbable fantasies about endless bottles 'o pop and colour co-ordinated babes clawing eachothers eyes out to get at him ..... The Mum in me wants to tell him that if he drank a little less pop and washed his face, he might meet real girls..... Or I am taking this all a bit to seriously? He could save up all that pop money and get a deposit for a nice liitle Ford Ka and girls like a nice little car... I'll shut up now, as its time for my HRT and complex seaweed bioflavin antibacterial footbath.

How about Cravendale... 'So good the cows want it back.' Of course they want it back. It's produced to suckle their young. It's THEIR BLOODY MILK. We are the fucking weirdos for drinking from the dugs of the bovine. Don't try and make us think their something sinister about a species wanting it's own milk. Don't do that. How would we feel if the ad was reversed? I might make it. Might steal some milk from pendulously milky breasted women for the following ad: A load of cows standing around in a field drinking milk out of a big trough... a load of well endowed, motherly breasted type women running menacingly towards said cows with rolling pins in their hands... Cut to a load of little babies, wasting away, crying for their mammas' milk... 'So good the humans want it back.' Shudder. Shudder. Shudder. Shudder. We're the sick ones. Drinking other animals' milk. Then suggesting the cows are the fuck ups for wanting THEIR OWN MILK back. What have we become. What??? I've finished now. Thank you.

hahahahahha