* TA CHUCKS *

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Sat, 2001-05-05 20:23

Cousin_Hilda-(u...

*** TA CHUCKS ***

Ey up me luvs

I was thinkin' to mesen -

Everyone 'ere, just bogs off to me caff, and meets everyone else in private...
'Ow about, Hildas goes live?
A meeting spot...a bit like a cyber Queen Vic, or a Virtual Rovers return, of course, wi' a bit more class.....

Anyway - I's openin' the doors, yer all welcome.
Over there on the right, is pontificators pedestal, fer all the gifted and planet brained ones, to crow at the lesser mortals, on t' left is Knock em back table, for those as want to teach the pontificators a lesson.
Owt back, is limerick larder, fer discussing finer parts of rhyme and (cough) metre.
Theres a function room oopstairs, fer coats and stuff like, an' I promise not ter dip me whippet in yer beer.
Cake of t' Day visible ont blackboard, usual fare includes conny onny butties, black pudding beer, mushy prose wi' mint sauce, haute dogs. Speshuls announced daily....

Mon, 2001-05-07 18:43

andrew pack

Some G K Chesternuts for the macaw, who is disappointed that there is not a separate squawky menu for our feathered custom. Never underestimate the power of the winged pound, the macaw is minted, picking up eighty quid in royalty for every mention. The macaw is very impressed by the mirror in the gents though, he has been perched on the taps for ages telling everyone how pretty he is. I think he's trying to lure the female clientele inside.

Sat, 2001-05-19 12:17

w1ldrover

Hi ... where do I plug me guitar in ... you did order the live music didn't you?

Mon, 2001-05-07 21:46

IFB

evening all ...

Mon, 2001-05-07 21:56

IFB

large gin and miltonic for me please hilda ....

Tue, 2004-05-11 20:04

mississippi

She was a fool, she could have shagged me and I'd have kept my mouth shut. Well, except for when....

Sat, 2001-05-19 21:03

Merseysippi

Ta, Stormy. Nice to win with any kind of goal. SO GLAD I was there! We won the FA Cup with TWO Ow(e)n goals! Charlton 0 - 4 Liverpool (Just for the record.) Normal service has been resumed.

Sun, 2001-05-20 00:48

stormy petrel

Rumour has it that Charlton were bribed by some unknown benefactor to lose in exchange for ground improvements. Can't believe all you hear. Bit like Fergie claiming that Spurs only attacked 3 times. I saw the highlights. It was at least 4. Liked your Alaves badge doo dah. Reminded me of when I stamped on Hoddles signed picture all those years ago when he went off to Monaco. Oh dear. *Suggest Ricky Tomlinson for eddie*

Tue, 2004-05-11 20:10

Ely Whitley

easy there stallion... ooh you're a one aren't you!

Tue, 2001-05-08 00:07

#10

Taj Hayer

Oh dear, it seems to be one of THOSE kind of parties. I suppose a glass of orange juice and a tube of Pringles is out of the question then?

Tue, 2004-05-11 20:34

#11

Flash

Is it true that Princess diana called her legs Open and Goal?

Sun, 2001-05-20 11:37

#12

w1ldrover

Well I guess the live music must have been for another drinking establishment ... gis a glass of something afore I go

Tue, 2001-05-08 01:04

#13

spaghetti_si

Am I a bit late? Hmmm, well if you are open I shall wet the Brooke's head with a Gin and Miltonic.

Sun, 2001-05-20 11:41

#14

ivoryfishbone

hmmmmmm not sure i welcome MUSICIANS .... *quivers*

Tue, 2001-05-08 01:17

#15

kurious_oranj

i like to apply the "mull of kintyre" rule on parties, that is if a guest is swaying any less than 30 degrees to either side, another gin and miltonic is required. *how about those yankees? chin chin!*

Sun, 2001-05-20 13:39

#16

Merseysippi

Ricky Tomlinson, his arse! Suggest a cross between John Peel and Alexei Sayle for Eddie. (I saw him at the match) *Suggest any of the Muppets for Stormy Colin*

Sun, 2001-05-20 16:42

#17

IFB

i was thinking kevin kline for eddie *swoons* ... someone lean sandy and rather dirty for stormy ... can't think who ...

Sun, 2001-05-20 17:12

#18

Merseysippi

My, my, what a powerful imagination you have, Ivy. He looks more like Kevin de-kline, if yer ask me.

Sun, 2001-05-20 17:16

#19

curua

*suggests Ade Edmondson for Dogplop* >:-)

Sun, 2001-05-20 17:46

#20

IFB

imagination is very sustaining ...

Tue, 2001-05-08 18:41

#21

andrew pack

I regret to inform the guests at TA Chucks that Lee the macaw will not be appearing tonight. He forgot which drinks he had spiked last night and trashed his hotel room, throwing a Corby trouser press out of the window and into the swimming pool. He is now drying out in The Rookery, a special unit for Celebrity Birds who have 'over-partied'. We are all, in some small way, to blame.

Sun, 2001-05-20 19:07

#22

w1ldrover

Hmmm ... I just broke my g-string anyway ... you got a spare one I could use ivoryfishbone??

Sun, 2001-05-20 19:44

#23

IFB

*gasps*

Tue, 2001-05-08 18:55

#24

andrea

Perhaps he should try choking on a littlefishbone next time...

Tue, 2001-05-08 18:58

#25

andrew pack

How very true Andrea. At least that would have slowed down his alchol consumption. The brutal thing was, he tried to fly home. How many times have I told him, if you fly, don't drink and if you drink, don't fly ? He already has plans on his recovery to fly down to the zoo and replace the flamingos colour-giving shrimps with mandarin segments. He is on the mend, I'll warrant.

Tue, 2001-05-08 19:01

#26

andrea

Wouldn't only have slowed it down, would have put paid to it permanently. Perhaps not a bad thing, on reflection. Seems to be something of a birdbrain...

Sun, 2001-05-20 23:31

#27

ivoryfishbone

more chucks fizz please hilda ... and would you mind keeping the musos out?

Tue, 2004-05-11 23:14

#28

Katrina

hello I am new here, is there room for a little one?

Mon, 2001-05-21 00:47

#29

Kermit_the_Dog

Aihm undergoin 'n haidentity crysys. Pork scratchings anyone?

Mon, 2001-05-21 00:53

#30

Tame_Metro

Maybe you should play the balalaika W1ld.

Mon, 2001-05-21 10:45

#31

w1ldrover

At the rate my strings (there goes my D string ::twang!!::)are breaking Tame I will soon only have 3 strings left ... now if I can just reshape my guitar into a triangle..............

Tue, 2001-05-08 19:51

#32

IFB

i am willing to admit my part in the macaw's downfall ... but andrew ... tell me ... do they offer this so called 7 step ABC addiction recovery programme at the Rookery???

Mon, 2001-05-14 16:57

#33

IFB

is it too early for a pint of pedest ale? ... had a hard day ... my exhaust dropped off ...

Mon, 2001-05-14 18:07

#34

andrew pack

Hello everyone. Gosh, it's a bit gloomy in here, I'll open all these curtains and turn off the mournful music. Hilda, this new southern fried chicken is excellent, really spicy. It doesn't really taste like chicken though, more exotic. Like parrot or something. Why is everyone looking at me ? Have I missed something ? Why is there a gold plaque over by Lee's perch ? This really is excellent chicken Hilda - any more ? No ?

Tue, 2001-05-08 20:31

#35

andrew pack

Of a kind Ivory, but it is more of a seven peck programme. I don't advise it, unless you have tougher skin than I.

Mon, 2001-05-14 18:10

#36

IFB

andrew!!! .. pal!!!! nice to see you ... pull up a chair ... what are you drinking??? hey ... it's nice to have you back ... errrrrm ... gold plaque ... well ... ahem ....

Mon, 2001-05-14 18:55

#37

IFB

.. just to let everyone know ... there is a party in here later ... hilda is offering money off the pedest ale ... every pint you drink you get a whippet voucher and they can be redeemed for some very exciting whippet merchandise ... come on folks!!! ... let's celebrate!!!

Mon, 2001-05-21 19:51

#38

ivoryfishbone

a shandy lifeboat for me please ... and some whippet breath whisky for the poodle

Mon, 2001-05-21 21:51

#39

W H Audenary

I say, Ivory, is there a drink called Pouzo for poodles? Mighty quiet in here tonight. Have they all found lives to go to? Can't all be launching their slim volumes at the same time, eh, what?

Mon, 2001-05-21 22:07

#40

ivoryfishbone

bet they are all at the asylum .... poodle perky at thought of special poodle aperitif

Mon, 2001-05-21 22:22

#41

W H Audenary

The Asylum? Best place for the blighters! At least there's no football rubbish on the site tonight. Have you finished eating that orange yet, Ivory?

Tue, 2001-05-08 23:33

#42

spaghetti_si

Anyone in Ta Chucks tonight? I promise I will not avoid eye contact.

Mon, 2001-05-21 22:24

#43

ivoryfishbone

it's an eternal orange dearie ... yes merciful about the football ... some people just seem to be fixated don't they? can i get you a drink old chap???

Tue, 2001-05-08 23:40

#44

Liana

Mon, 2001-05-21 22:31

#45

W H Audenary

Do they have a Diet Guinness? If not, Horlicks on Tap will do. Thanks.

Mon, 2001-05-14 20:29

#46

guy ritchie

Alright guv, I was just in this ere rub-a-dub-dub to clock some action and get some background for me new 'ard-'itting underworld dominoes movie - all about a domino shark. It's gonna be set in "Evning guv" a seamy underworld domino parlour. It's called "knock-knock knock" - I've got a bit of casting in mind. Obviously er indoors is gonna play Liana and I thought Big Bob Hoskins for Stormy. Anyone else any ideas ? Ere, what's with the geezer eating the bucket of Kentucky - he looks like he's lost his Richard.

Wed, 2001-05-09 08:19

#47

spaghetti_si

*Sees Liana and makes eye contact*

Wed, 2001-05-09 08:56

#48

Liana

Its about bleedin' time!! Ive been sat here all night!!!

Mon, 2001-05-14 21:35

#49

Liana

Rick W - Stephen Fry obv

Wed, 2001-05-09 18:54

#50

spaghetti_si

* Si walks towards little miss liana* * He looks in awe of her and runs back to his seat and has another Gin and Miltonic* *Looks over once again and realises he should talk to her *

Mon, 2001-05-14 22:07

#51

IFB

and me????????????

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