Not so much a turn-off, but what sends me running a mile is the impression that the girl in question has had many boyfriends, and is very casual - almost callous - in their relationships. I don't like the idea that I might have to work very hard for something that doesn't mean anything to her. I desire equal footing, or I will be uncomfortable and not enjoy it.
Bizarrely, many girls who later turn out to be softies think it's 'de rigeur' to pretend to be a man-eater. I'm sure it works if you're after the same kind of trait in a partner, but then don't complain if he cheats and lies, for God's sake.
Tofu is horrid. Cous cous is lovely though... and of course people lie.
i lie.. "oooh, they were only 9.99, what a bargain"... thats not really the kind of lying i meant.
I was being too literal, apologies. Low IQ, you see. The lying cheat, okay, I can see what you're saying.
As an aside, a mate of mine at work, who cannot keep his penis in his pants, was having an affair with a married woman who, he found out, was also seeing another bloke. Marvellous. Apparently, she "went like a train". But there you go. He used to be married himself and cheated on his wife constantly. Oh, and the married woman's husband, who was some high flier, was cheating on his wife. Lies all round. Cheers.
Such facile points. Obviously stuck with writing. I'm off to work on my mental arithemetic and pythagoros.
The Marks & Sparks Mediterranean couscous is vile. Avoid - and that's the truth.
[%sig%]
I agree, I don't like liars or cheats but how can you tell just on someones
say so that they are not just that unless you have known them for a long
time only then that might make sence.
Also I can see where Karl is coming from in his first! post...
I heartily recommend the M&S tuna nicoise.You need to make sure it's all mixed up as the tuna and olives stay at the bottom, but the dressing rocks my world.
[%sig%]
Reporting from Bangkok now. It's hard not to like a country with cities named Bangkok and Phuket; and let's not forget my hotel in Chiang Mai: The Pornping Tower....lol....conveniently located near the Ping River I learned, which explains half of the name.
Speaking of opera, back in about 1994 we had a conference in Poland and brought all the Connecticut home office types over for a Regional confab. One evening the choice of activities was go to the opera or go to a restaurant in Old Town. I volunteered to lead the Old Town contingent, stating that I preferred a good meal and some lively conversation to three hours listening to people who sounded like their underwear was much too tight.
OTOH, I did go to see the Barber of Saville once and it was hilarious. They showed the translation on an overhead lcd thingie and the lyrics are a riot...lines like 'the mayor is a stupid goathead' and 'we'll start a bunch of rumors and send the town into chaos.' I was laughing out loud through much of it, which is not PC among the snobista crowd, but I was enjoying myself.
I suggested the things you and others have said might be just a ruse to piss me off because there *was* no debate. It can't be simply that you all disagree with me, because there was nothing in my original statement to disagree with. All I said was that I find pride in promiscuity an unattractive trait in someone. You can't contest that - it is simply the case. What you've then gone and done is started a big row about whose fault this is. Why does it have to be anyone's fault at all? Why can't you just let it be? This trait of mine works out fine for me, and probably everyone else. But you insist on rooting out the cause of the 'problem' - what can possibly be wrong with this young man that means he might not find *me* attractive, you seem to scream. Mississippi clearly, as in all issues, takes the side of his buddy.
*You* are also the one who turned it into a man/woman issue, and persist in keeping it as such. It's got nothing to do with gender for me - I find pride in promiscuity (or sluttishness, if you will,) an unattractive trait in men as well. It makes both sexes less easy to like.
This whole sorry farce of a thread reminds me of an anecdote I once read where a woman mentioned she found short people unattractive, and was consequently subjected to a tirade of insults from a very short gentleman who felt that he had to prove there was something *wrong* with anyone who didn't find him attractive.
Maybe I should dig around and find what it is that's wrong with your personality that makes you dislike blondes, Liana? Or would that be silly?
"Maybe your time would be better spent analysing why exactly people (and this is not only me) get this impression of you..."
The easy thing is to look at the similarities between the kind of people who do make up their own Hens to batter down. It seems you all have a particular chip on your shoulder, and just *have* to direct it at someone who seems to be in a vaguely different court. Missi, for instance, just loves to find an excuse to dispense his life lessons to me, even if they don't particularly oppose anything I have to say. You too have filled this thread up with passionate statements, supposedly in opposition to me, that I've never disagreed with. You've manufactured your own argument because it's obviously something that gets to you, like the aforementioned shortarse.
I note that Andrew and Bez have, in their usual manner, set things relatively straight. I admit I got carried away with my use of the word 'slut', but it was much easier to type, especially in my pissed off state, than 'people who brag about their promiscuity'. And I might well have thrown some severe misjudgements about you into the ring, in the spirit of revenge. Those who defend you know you better than I do, and are probably quite right about you. But I do wonder how it is possible for someone the least bit objective to take a completely innocent statement about my personal dislikes and turn it into a psychoanalytical war.
I'm quite capable of not sneering at people like fools when they don't act like fools. I/They do it roughly 99% of the time.
Hen, I don't know which of us is the sadder case; you, for picking up a dead argument after 11 hours - and from a different location - or me for reading it at half past f**king midnight.
[%sig%]
hahaha
thank goodness someone on here gets the idea, even if only a little..Justyn, I feel so wierd that you are out there...I also stayed in Bangkok...that hotel name rings a bell.
I tend to pretty much always tell the truth. I hate being lied to above all else. I'm not fond of mustashes, think blokes in sandals and socks look like plonkers ... umm But both of those can be overlooked if the bloke is genuine. I hate liars and cheats. Sloppy kisserrs yeuk. Oh, and weak men. I've become incrasingly intolerant to weakness in a man.
"And I might well have thrown some severe misjudgements about you into the ring, in the spirit of revenge."
Yes Hen. Angry as your misogyny makes me, I accept your apology.
Andrew think I said long ago and haven't changed my mind yet the
threads you write are always interesting and make a lot of sence hence
look for and really enjoy reading every word where others I could just
gloss over.
I now consider I have the brain and the know how no big achievement
only because I have lived so much longer than most and have been there
done that brought many! tee shirts along the way and made many!
mistakes and still do.
Where I fall down is not being able to get the words down on paper so to
speak as you can Andrew and one of my biggest regrets in life is not
having an education through no fault of my own also one other thing as
one gets older one tends to repeat themselves over and over but I never
ever mind over repeating this statement because it is I feel so true that
every experience in life no matter what! has to be felt! experienced! and
lived! before one is really qualified to talk on it even though its ok to
summise ( if thats the right word) its still not like really knowing your
subject so to speak.
Of cause we are all different and are allowed free speech and our own
way of thinking that is what keeps this world we live in turning and thank
God for that...
I'm eggy buns.
I am very, very old.
I am very, very fat.
I am very, very bald.
I am very, very beard.
I win Mr. Unattractive 2004 hands down.
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
very
very
very
much.
I find that what is unattractive in one person can be attractive in another and people with enough charm can be forgiven almost anything.
Having said that, with age, reliability becomes ever more attractive as does honesty and trustworthiness - so I suppose that it’s immorality (in the general sense) that I find to be unattractive.
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Emma, it's very unattractive to call me Flash :P
Hen, don't you think that a lot of women will use men rather than be used. I've seen it happen many times before and they are afraid to get hurt.
Men still do more of the cheating than women and I know Missi will shout about that but it's true.
Well, Liana, if people keep posing problems and alternative ideas, I will continue to ponder them outloud. Don't see it's got anything to do with being 'at it'. I take lengthy breaks - for example, spending most of the day visiting Lincoln, watching Holmes and generally havin' a good time on the last scraps of student loan! Ho!
Bez said:
"I don't know about UKA but there's going to be a limited amount of avant garde stuff here because there's a limited amount of it written. Nicoletta comes into that category and has been readily including by Tony."
It's not about how much is written on either site, but the attitude towards it. Admittedly, Tony's love of Nikki's stuff sticks a craw in my theory, but that just shows the danger of generalisation. The main point is that I find myself frequently having to defend the notions of avant garde/experimentalism on ABC, or else let frustrating comments slide, whereas the people on UKA who don't buy it generally stay quiet, and let those of us who *do* buy it get on with it.
Missi laughed at a joke about gayness. Could he *be* more schoolboy? And I'll wager, in any case, that I'm getting more girl action than he at the minute. Just in case you were still wondering about the gayness....
I guess I am wearing tights in the picture. But that's because I like wearing silly things here and there. Besides, it's a cool snap. Smoky.
Fishy - no offence taken. Your views agree with my own, it seems, entirely. Thankee, thankee, thankee. That is all I meant by my reasoning.
just a liar, whether they be male or female. Met many, remained friends with none. Shame because until he/she lied I trusted them!
Still I suppose that's what giving your all means. You give, the liars take.
>>>That would be 'In like Flint', Colin.<<<
Told you I'd make a tit of myself.
I always thought it was an Errol reference... swashbuckling combined with his prediliction for young ladies... and very apt for this thread.
Just goes to show you are never too old to learn.
Ho hum as TC would say.
Pip pip.
Well, it IS a well known fact that Errol did get in as often as he could, so I can see how you worked that out. Still I suppose what him being a little on the promiscuous side he only ever shagged slappers. I doubt therefore, that any of his ex's would be welcome in Norwich.
Thanks Bes I will take your advice. I love modern classical too - Kronos Quartet are top of my pops so a bit of discordant stuff doesn't phase me.
I like good trance/hip hop or whatever it's meant to be called as well. urban Species, Rae and Christian, LTJ Bukem all rock my socks.
Gardiner can't stand any of it - he's still stuck with the Grateful Dead. Ho Hum, so it goes.
Justyn my youngest son now in his thirties has lived in Thailand for many
years and loves it there also wouldn't come home to stay if I paid him, he
has just move from Bangkok and is now living and working at which looks
like a lovely resort Northwest of Thai about 130 kilometres from the
Burmese border, resort belongs to a German man and his English wife, my
son loves it so much he now speaks Thai fluently and has even taken a
Thai name which I think is the same as his in English.
I would be interested to know how you find it Justyn if and when you can
spare the time as for me it would make interesting reading and if you don't
wish to reply on the threads my e- mail address is correct at the top of this
post...
Kindest regards to you.
ok, time to make a tit of myself I suppose. I've just spent an eon re-reading this thread of "same assertion as my last post only with an added twist/insult" and have concluded thus:
Hen, you really do shoot yourself in the foot by your continual postings. Go back and read this thread from the start then tell me who kicked off the mud slinging. From what I've absorbed all was tickety-boo until Dotty Bes mentioned hot dinners. Liana responded to his point. You were in like Flynn against Liana before Bes had time to respond (which he did shortly thereafter) and it kicked off from there.
So your continual "I can't believe I'm returning to this thread to defend myself" remarks are somewhat disingenuous. You kicked it off. Nobody had a go at you. Read it again before you attack me.
You are also being disingenuous regarding the uka v abc threads. There are sensible threads on both sites - most of which are outside the 'general discussions'.
In fact, I cannot remember the last time I saw you post on the UK general diss board. You spend most of your time on the 'sensible board' and in comments on work.
Do you not think it a weakness in your argument that here, you spend your time arguing on the gen diss board and taking no part in the discuss writing board?
You and I haven't clashed before nor do I want to now but I think you need to step back every now and then read the posts that have gone before without wearing your hat of paranoia.
Everybody understood your original point. It is what followed that caused the problem.
While I would agree that there is something unpleasant in both sexes when they feel the need to brag about conquests or number of partners - at any age never mind 20 - you have to realise that 'most' women who have had more than a few partners will become, as dotty said, monogomous once their internal whateveryoucallit tells them this is mr. right.
And no, I won't be replying. You may have noticed I rarely get involved in constant rebuttal. These are my thoughts on the matter. People can take or leave them. I don't really care that much.
Gasp, well, Marc - I will do my best not to like tofu anymore. In actual fact I never eat it in this country. But, having lived in South East Asia, I have had the real thing which is somewhat different...believe me.
I'm quite chuffed to be defending opera; usually I'm defending Big Brother or East Enders.
*
I know what Hen means. I had a girlfriend who'd had more men than hot dinners, despite which she proved rigorously faithful with me. After a while she said it was great to go out and not have to be "hard". I think she meant that when she went out as a single she had to be alert all the time; now she could let her guard down and relax.
It may be true, as Sabelle says, that men do most of the cheating, but I belive that's due to greater opportunity. I believe that given the opportunity women cheat as readily as men.
*
I'm not a great fan of quartets. I think the only one I really like is Janacek's.
Jay, I'll be happy to write something when I return in a few days.
Emma, The Pornping is in Chiang Mai...though Porn and Nut are fairly common first names for females in Thailand. For my last couple ofdays here in Bangkok I'm staying in the Honey Hotel, which looks like a Viet Nam Era-vintage establishment for GIs on R&R...and if the lobby is any indication, some of them checked in around 1967 and never left.....
As for opera, I also saw La Fortza Del Destino in about 1974 in NYC. I rather liked it, but Italian opera all seem so clownish and wildly overblown it's just comical to me.
Oh, and I made the dire mistake of going to a matinee production of Boris Gudinov in NYC circa 1994. I left after the first 90 minutes with another 3 hours to go. That was without question the most boring piece of music ever written, at least to my knowledge. It makes the One Note Samba sound like the Flight of the BumbleBee. On my way home, I stopped in the Grand Central Station for a coffee and listened to a group of Peruvian buskers playing flutes and bongo drums, which was far more intertaining that Bore-Us Good-Enough.
Justyn, p'raps it was the pornping I stayed in in Chiang Mai...I'm talking 20 years ago...
Have you ever stayed in Raffles Hotel in Singapore...I used to live there?
Aww, Tom...
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