choosing schools 2019


My son told me the other day about someone getting in trouble with a knife in the playground. I was worried, but thought, well, the school will be on it, it won't
happen again. Then he explained he'd only mentioned it because it was
someone he knew, who had been threatend and there was a knife incident
of some kind every week.

At his previous school the main topics of conversation were suicide or porn, and the children at this new school are much happier as is my son since going there. Now I am not so worried for his state of mind and more for his physical state and don't know what to do for the best!


So sad, such a confused generation. He knows you care. Rhiannon


Thanks, Rhiannon, yes. But we are supposed to do what's best and I don't know what that is? I don't have any experience that helps


I suppose maybe you could email the school with your concerns. The youngsters of this generation haven't been given much of a foundaiton for the 'why' of morality except in 'it should feel right to you to be kind and not hurt others', but the foundation of an awareness of God who defined it, can nurture a love of what is right, and a right fear of doing wrong, together with a support available in everyday life. Rhiannon


Thankyou for taking the time to think about this Rhiannon :0) The school are worried about it. I think, from the news everyone is. What is strange is how different the situations are between big cities/gangs and here/individuals and yet the problem seems the same


I'm afraid today that, according to our local deputy head, there's an epidemic of mental health issues affecting our children and no one knows why. Maybe they're exposed to too much social media at an age when they aren't emotionally developed enough to cope with it. Maybe our education system has become too much like a factory process forcing square shapes into round holes. Maybe its an environmental thing. Whatever it is, it doesn't seem to be getting any better. It's a sad state of affairs, it really is.

Yes it is, Scorpio. Thankyou for your comment. We live in a very beautiful part of the world but last year a child commited a terrible crime. And yesterday, not here but nearby, a 17 year old took his life. It's not the environment. My son said lots more people started carrying knives when the school got in special lecturers to tell them all how dangerous knives were. So everyone got more afraid. I don't know if that's understood by government.


Oh Di, what a worry it must be for you. I don't think you have much choice where you are though, right? Was his previous school a primary one, or have you already moved him from another secondary (or whatever they're called now)?

From what I've read, they carry knives because they're worried about knife crime themselves, and it's 'for protection' - but of course it doesn't protect anybody and just makes things worse


Hi Insert :0) He is at school on the mainland, we moved him from the secondary here. Which has got better according to his friends, but they all still say they wish they were going to his school. Several of them hardly go in at all as far as I can tell, because of depression etc. He is becoming much better at coping with stuff since going there, but he is so afraid and it's a long trip.

On another topic, he is a blooming genius writer :0) I don't know how cos he NEVER READS ANYTHING  except instructions on the games he plays. He is planets away from my writing abilities. He has his English teacher eating out of his hand, which am not sure is good. What he wants to do is write the ideas/dialogue etc for video games like Ark and Sub Nautica. I don't know if I should be badgering him to read books (thery still aren't reading anything at school) or leave him to it as he is brilliant as he is? Should we keep saying he is brilliant or will that make him try even less? He is always complaining how often I say he is lazy :0) So maybe it wouldn't matter so much if he came back here and dropped out of school? I just don't know


Is there some kind of summer school where he could learn the skills for writing dialogue/video games etc? Or perhaps you (and he) could find out who to hassle for some related work experience?

Badgering boys to read things, from experience, never ends well, but I think it's good that there's a teacher who rates him. I remember when they were little, thinking when my boys got older that they'd need less input from me - and it's not like that at all is it - it's the opposite!


Thankyou so much Insert, adding parental advice to everything else you do!!!

I wish he would go on a Summer course. I think part of my worrying I'm letting him down is that my neice has gone on a writer's workshop. She is half his age but has got loads of support and opportunities already. There is a creative writing group after school but he comes straight home as it's a long day already? Dundee seems to be the place for games but it's the other side of Scotland. He is much cleverer than me (thank goodness) so am not sure I have any useful input anymore, other than the when did you last have a bath variety :0)


Oh Di, it's at times like this I'm so glad mine are way past school age now.  With the knife crime thing - I don't know how things work up there but here we have a Safer Neighbourhoods partnership which includes police, schools and other agencies and I think they run community events where parents and others can raise issues and ask for advice.  Of course it may not be viable in a smaller or more dispersed community.  

I'd be pretty much inclined to let him be brilliant in his own way for now.  If he's into the whole games thing he may know what's out there in the way of courses or summer schools already and will come to you when he finds something that takes his fancy. Also, girls tend to be more amendable to doing things like that.  I know it often feels like stumbling in the dark, especially when they're into something you as a parent know little or nothing about.  If he knows you're on his side and will support him, you've already done a brilliant job yourself because a lot of kids don't have that.  Sometimes you have to hold your breath and hope that they and you come out the other side.  

Thanks so much for commenting, AF. It is very comforting to have advice from people who have beeen through it all :0)  I bet Tony Cook had no idea what a variously valuable resource ABC would be. I met my partner on ABC, so our son is sort of because of it too. So  I guess I think of kind people here as like god parents


That's amazing!  I didn't know we did romance as well!  heart