Alphabet You Can’t

Posted by GlosKat on Tue, 03 Feb 2026

Alphabet You Can’t

 Inspired by Soulfire77’s Frankenplot competition (and beholden to him for the title above) I thought I would offer to donate £25 to ABC to see what anyone can come up with for ‘an Alphabet story’.

This means a coherent story where every word starts with the next letter of the alphabet eg “A bear called David eats figs greedily ..“ type thing. 

It doesn’t have to be a story, it could be  a poem or a non-fiction prose piece, any type of writing.  Or even several self-contained pieces, although the fewer the better, so long as the letters follow on in the correct sequence.

And it’s not really a competition, I couldn’t think of another word for it, although I might pick my favourite.

I’ve had loads of goes at it myself over the years, and never produced anything more than incoherent drivel !

Please post your entries in the Comments below, or if you’re a bit shy you can send them to me via Claudine at claudine@abctales.com

We’ll say that the cutoff date is 18th February.

PS Feel free to post more than one entry.

Note : illustration free from ClipArtMag

Comments

Submitted by insertponceyfre... on

This is a brilliant idea Gloskat - hope you get lots of entries, and thank you very much for the donation!

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

You're welcome Claudine !  I'm looking forward to seeing what people can do with it.

 

Submitted by TJW on

Alpha Bravo Charlie Delta Echo Foxtrot Golf Hotel India Juliet Kilo Lima Mike November Oscar Peru Quebec Romeo Sierra Tango Uniform Victor Whiskey X-ray Yankee Zulu

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

Thanks JJ.  Many stories embedded in that list.  I'm sorry for your losses. Great entry.

 

Submitted by TJW on

Alright, so been thinking about it.  What people call me is not the hill I want to die on.  Thaddeus, Thad, TJ, Jack, JJ, none of those names will end my  life or effect my bank account.  Henceforward, I don't give a shit.  It's my late new year's resolution:  it's bullshit to represent options and then demand the correct option.  Call me whatever.  My name ain't the hill I want to die on.

 

Submitted by SoulFire77 on

I'll do the best that I can. It seems only fair that I wait until closer to the end before submitting, since I had a heads up about the competition. 

If anyone can create one before the deadline, I will also donate $25 to ABCtales!
 

Thank you, Gloskat, for the wonderful writing exercise! Good luck, everyone!

 

Submitted by ScoZen on

                                                     Alphabet You Can’t.

                                              

                                          Amelia's…baby...cries....Din...dins

                                eating…foodie...gobbles…hiccups…indigestion

                                      jaded…kindly…loving...mummy... nappy…ok..

                                                    possets...quietly

                                  runs... stumbles…tumbles...under...vestibule

                                         wishing…xmas...yawning…Zzzzz                                 

                       

 

 

 

ScoZen

Submitted by GlosKat on

Brilliant ScoZen, thank you for entering.  I can picture the story in there.  

 

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

smiley

 

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

A surreal one from me,  Kat. smiley

A Bachelor Cameraman Did Enter Four Gated Houses In Japan Knowing Local Mothers Not Only Picked Qualified Romanian Students To Understand Vexatious Women Xeroxing Young Zebra

 

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

Very surreal Luigi ! 

Made me think of a Dali painting but I don't quite know why, I've never seen a painting of someone trying to fit a zebra into a photocopying machine !  Thank you for entering.

 

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

In 2013 I did a similar exercise. An alphabetical acrostic poem you might like to read.Here is the link https://www.abctales.com/story/luigipagano/stormy-relationship.

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

You must have had a classical education Luigi - I had to look up Xanthippe. I didn't know she was "the most difficult, harshest, painful, ill-tempered wife" of Socrates (according to Wikipedia)

I loved your poem and I've learnt something new because you didn't take the easy option and have the lady of the poem play the xylophone or go for an x-ray.  smiley

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Among beloved charitable declaration, eccentricity festers, ghastly hamstring injustice, jinxing kindrids lasting majority need of peace. Quiet reflection seals tension, unity valued welcome xenium, your zenith.

Hope this works.

Jenny.

 

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

Lovely Jenny, thank you.  I had to look up 'Xenium' so another new word for me.  

 

Submitted by marandina on

A bloke called Dave, Eastender from Greenwich, hardwired inveterate journalist kept lingering, making notes of probing quality, reaping stories that undermined values, withering xenophobia, yawning zoology.

 

Great idea and that's wonderfully generous of you, Kat. 

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

Thank you Paul !

 

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

It amazes me that people can write such coherent stories given the alphabetical constraints. Well done, folks.

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

My feelings exactly Luigi ! So many entries and all of them so different.

When I suggested the idea to Claudine I wasn't sure anybody would be that interested at all, I thought how embarrassing it would be if there were no entries, and how relieved I would be to get just one.

so I'm amazed that so many people have entered with such inventive stories, in such a short space of time.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Hi, seeing Scozen's and yours as posting, I posted mine on site thinking that was being done and just going to put a link here. But here it is:

ABCtales brings challenges, delivers empathy, friendly given-help on joining, knowing learning media new often pressurises quirky readers suspicious towards using virtual writing. (X yesterday zapped!)

thanks for the challenge, it is difficult to keep going on the one theme! Rh

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

Thanks Rhiannon !

It certainly is difficult to keep going on one theme for the whole 26 letters, I've tried and failed many times myself.  I like your ABC themed onesmiley

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

A Bear Called David Eats Figs Greedily.

He Imbibes Juiced Kale. 

Large Mammals Need Outsize Portions. 

Quite Right

Say The Uruguayan Volcanic Walruses + Yugoslavian Zebras.

 

Notes :

If you rotate an x through 45 degrees it becomes a plus sign. (OK, it's sneaky). 
So as to head off the zoological and vulcanologist smarty pants who will say there are no walruses or volcanoes in Uruguay, and no zebras in Yugoslavia, I'd like to point out they all became extinct a long time ago.  In fact, come to think of it, even Yugoslavia is extinct now.

 

Submitted by SoulFire77 on

These are fantasic submissions! I am so pleased that Gloskat's idea has prompted so many people to participate here. For everyone that posted their idea, I imagine that there are ten others out there that at least attempted it but never posted (thank you all).

Now that there have been some other submissions, I'd like to post my own. I hope it will inspire some fresh ideas for those who have not been able to complete this writing exercise. Please remember that I knew of this competition in well in advance and have had more time to develop my submission.

"Aliens beyond comprehension devoured ever fragile gasping human innocents. Just kingdoms lamented massive nightmarish offensives, prompting quixotic rebellions, summoning tenacious uprisings versus wicked xenomorphs - yielding zero."

 

Submitted by GlosKat on

A sci-fi one !  Well done Jay.

 

Submitted by SoulFire77 on

Thank you!

The hardest part to nail down was "ever fragile gasping human innocents". That phrase didn't click for me until just today.

My best advice to everyone is: find the phrases inside the story first... "aliens beyond comprehension" and "massive nightmarish offenses" for example. Then, work to connect the phrases you already have. This will eventually produce a coherent storyline with some work.

It was facinating to me how many revisions a 26 word story requires! It was a great exercise in focused thinking.

 

Submitted by Turlough on

Angie Bowie caught David eating frozen Greenland herrings in Józef Kossakowski’s larder. Meanwhile, Norwegian obese people quaffed rotted sturgeon tails under veils with xanthic Yup’ik zealots.

A typical day in our village, We always have fish on Fridays.

Turlough

Submitted by GlosKat on

I was really hoping you would enter, Turlough, I knew you'd do something good.smiley

 

Submitted by Turlough on

My first draft brought up Jeremy Kyle's lounge which I thought sounded a bit chavvy. I'm happier with Józef Kossakowski but he required some looking up, so I suppose that was a bit cheaty.

Turlough

Submitted by GlosKat on

Nothing wrong with looking things up.  I had to check whether or not there really were volcanoes or walruses in Uruguay, although I was pretty certain there were no zebras in the former Yugoslavia.

Are they Orthodox Catholics in your village ?  We used to have poached egg and chips on a Friday.

 

Submitted by Turlough on

Hence the song lyrics… I am the egg man. I am the walrus.

Those that are religious here are Eastern Orthodox which has no links to Catholicism apart from the fact that they treat choirboys with equal brutality. Most people have no religion because communism encouraged / enforced atheism.

I didn’t know until I started to learn the Bulgarian language that Yugoslavia means place of Southern Slavs. We have two bus stations in town, one of which is called the avtogara yug, which means south bus station. Meko Yugoslavia means soft southern Slavs which would probably be the theme of a football chant if Leeds was in the Balkans.

All of those former Yugoslav republics are beautiful places to visit, though I haven’t been to Montenegro yet.

Turlough

Submitted by ScoZen on

                                    GlosKats… Alphabet You Can’t  

                         ancient  buddhist  chant’s  distant  echo’s

                                        from  golden  hills

                                   incantations  joy  kindness  love

                         meditation  nature  offers  peace  quietness

                                    regal  saffron  togetherness

                                   unbowed  visionary  wanting

                                             xanadu  

                                        yearning  Zen

 

ScoZen

Submitted by GlosKat on

Thanks ScoZen.  You've kept the theme running all the way through, which is the difficult bit.  I like your updated baby one too.