Girls In Da ABC Hood ...

Wow....this is my kind of thread....can I join? I have much work to do here

is it anything to do with your pink fluffy slippers, Sword?

134.... fish is not talking to you. you are getting her into TROUBLE *see fenner thread*

*ignoring 134*

Apologies for any aggro I may have caused. I will fall on my own sword, fish. If I promise to stop being SO NICE to people will you let me join your gang?

do you have stilettoes? and im not talking poncy shoes for essex babes here.....

You have to impress Liana, Charlie *continues to patrol border with needle*

ah yes ... you have to be really REALLY horrid to join our gang ... AND you have to go through the Initiation Rites ... *whispers to Pirhana ... "what ARE those by the way?"*

I've got little bits of stilton between my toes. Does that count? I've also got your promotional video 'Da Hood. Da Bad and De Ugly'. You DO look fetching in your flannelette biker-girl gear, Pirahna.

Tell you what grrrls - if you let me join your gang I solemnly swear that I will only be nasty to people who are hard enough or stupid enough to stray into Da ABC Hood. I will be very polite on all other threads from now on. Fair enough? *secretly dreading that the initiation will involve Lemm***ade*

*hands Ari a penknife*

but are you a GRRL? this is important!! Any scrotes that stay our way get removed... its in the roolz.. you must understand...

oh yes you have to be a GRRRRRL ... *swotting up on the Initiation Rites Encyclopaedia*

Liana ..... guess what .... son returned from night out with only one eyebrow ......... it wasn't me and am a not sure which female was responsible .... but then I got to thinking about my battery (rechargable) powered lady shave ..... have been giving it serious consideration all day .... What you think?

I am a Number. I am genderless. I promise not to peek in Da Showers in case I start counting sticky-out things. This might cause embarrassment, but it is only my hobby. If you enrol me I won't let you down. You can count on me.

does it have a muffler? *sees potential use for pognophobes*

sistah.. yer in.

can I join .... asks very quietly .... keeps fingers cross

SPEAK UP!!!!!!!

ok will speak louder have .....very sticky tape in my bag ..... use it in a manor of attack ..... that is very pleasing ..... bit like waxing legs but more drastic ..... do you follow my point .... tweasers work well but the joy of ripping celotape has it's function ..... found it works great upon sleeping individuals upper lip when you want their attention ..... do you want the low down?

hmmmm ... that's better ...

Oh, THANK YOU sistahs! Can I do your accounts? I'm an expert in cash-flow and blood- flow. I've got a knuckleduster abacus and a cut-throat razor which I stole from Occam. I'm also very good at body counts and shouting the odds.

have also found that putting salt into tea instead of sugar also has strange effect upon male face.......

the best one was sewing certain gap in boxer shorts up .....

*summons fish back from janus thread immediately*

*leaps in*

we need a little get together about the 'ardness of said gang i fear..... now, gather round.....

friend of mine got her own back on her partner by shaving one side of his hair complete off whilst he sept off a drinking spree.... I am of course totally innocent of any act commited against poor male that has a problem with his taste buds or his boxer shorts or the sore upper lip .... it was all down to their imagination

pioden!!!!! Good Grief!! << I am of course totally innocent of any act commited against poor male >> Get out now!

am ready .... with hose and wire clippers ..... don't know why but I've have got them from garden shed .....

*strokes chin* thats a little better....

ahhhhhhh not fair ........ was enjoy myself .... can't I play some more ........

this threads getting very long ...why are you stroking your chin ?

*gathers*

Anyone you GRRRLS want me to do a little number on? *idly sharpens number 4* I used to be in the Triads, you know. They were the Duads until I arrived. I have entered the Hung Gates and taken the Thirty Six Oaths. I'm a fully paid up 49. They call themselves 'The Hung Brothers', though I didn't see much evidence of that in their trousers. Bunch of poofs, the lot of 'em. That's why I've joined Da Sistahs of No Mercy. ps It was me who devised the numbering system for Chinese food: 14 with fried rice, 34 with chips etc. You've got a lot to thank me for.

Fellah sistahs, I just got a txt msg. Molly Be Damned smote Jimmy the Harp. I gotta meet her by the fall-down tree. On my way I'll pop in to see those Nancy Girls at Thoughtcafe. I'm running a little Internet Numbers Racket and I'm ode a few bob. May your blades stay as sharp as Madonna's bra...

sorry no muffler but it does sound like ..... one of those kiddies remote control boats .... came accross much better tool ...... it shreds, it slices, it dices ..... forgotten what's it called but in was sitting in the kitchen draw ..... the slices bit looks a bit interesting ...... have now taken without asking one pair of combat trousers from elder son ... a bit tight in the never region but they do the job .... cycle helmet on head and daughters padded jacket ..... the stilletos look a bit odd ..... but feel well dressed (stupid) ...... have problem standing up with out support (it's ages since I wore these shoes .... am more use to wearing the old Dcs) shall I do a tour of the boundary? Do I need a fesh layer of combat paint checks makeup bag ..... out flew a few moths ... daughter right I do need to do a complete overall ...... What a 'pognophobes' ...... I mean I know what 'pogs' is ..... it's a kiddies game ....... scrathes head ..... sorry stupidy but thats what you get when your blonde ... I mean a red head

Me.

@!#$ ing too right I do. *fingers flick knife*

*polishes knuckles dusters and handle of small pearl handled pistol* what's this???? Tom Saunders? YOU can't join!!!!!!

No men allowed tom. sorry. tell you what, why dont you start a Boyz in da ABC hood style thread...... *swaggers off kicking a coke can*

*lights fag ... looks over shades* yeah tom .... you are a bloke ... with one of them Polar Bear pieces ...

we need hood names sistahh... who are you?

how's that sistah????? and can we have some rooolz?

@!#$ off! They'd talk about football and keep going on about meeting up and punching each other out. I want to discuss knitting.

well here, we will talk about the emotional fuckwittery of bruthas and punching each other out. no knitting patterns. knitting needles will only be used as weapons in this gang. now sit on this upturned oil drum, and start talking.

i say we torch his slippers sistah ...

and nick his wallet and.. *fingers razor*... cut his BEARD off...

yeah .... we could pluck it out hair by hair ... what d' you reckon ... oh and i think we need some kind of war cry ... how about "E!"???

E!!! YES!!!! PERFECT!!!